Missing a morning to visit rival school - should I tell current school the real reason for absence?

[castille]

So far we have been happy with DD's school (equivalent of Yr 7 - we're in France) but there are changes afoot for next year that we aren't entirely happy with, so we've been looking at alternatives.

She has been invited to attend a taster morning at another school so I need to write a note explaining her absence. Should I tell the truth? Would you?

I'd tell the truth, and explain that you're looking into alternatives because you have issues with the planned changes. Seems sensible to be honest about these things to me, that way they understand how much feeling there is, and may even reconsider, but if they don't you've been honest about the problem.

I agree re honesty.

But telling them won't make a blind bit of difference to their decisions, sadly. Other parents who have threatened to move their children have been told "well we can't make you stay"

Yes, you don't owe the school any weird loyalty.

Scenario 1: you like the new school and move. In which case, who cares about what the current school think.
Scenario 2: you don't like the new school so you have to come crawling back with your tail between your legs. Puts you in a weak position for complaining about the forthcoming changes.

However, the most important thing is your DD. Are you going to ask her to lie to the current school? Be careful how you phrase it to her.

Well, if they're not listening to what the parents say, then I think that's even more reason not to sugar-coat it. But I'd word it in terms of "looking into possibilities" rather than "definitely planning to move" just in case you don't like the other one, or it doesn't work out for whatever reason.

Oh I know fleacircus, but I feel very guilty even considering moving her! The teachers are terrific and are bending over backwards to try to retain the families who are thinking of fleeing.

It's the new head who, despite meetings and emails and phone calls from angry parents, still hasn't quite understood how unpopular her decisions are with some parents.

If it's like a British secondary, though, your letter wont go to the head, it will go to a form teacher equivalent. Who may be sad to see your DD go, but wont take it as a personal insult (unless they're a bit of a loon, which is always possible). What was the new school like, or is the visit still to come?