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Secondary education

Connect with other parents whose children are starting secondary school on this forum.

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Original poster

Cheating school admissions. Wrong I know but needs must.

54 replies

LG8 · 08/04/2009 08:08

I have to choose my son's secondary school by October. We basically have a choice of 2 notorious, failing schools in special measures. My son is quiet and sensitive and it will be like sending a lamb to the slaughter. He gets picked on at primary school now so secondary will be hard enough for him as it is, without sending him to a daily war zone. I just can't do it, I'm not willing to do it.

My partner lives in the catchment of 3 very good schools. He has suggested we use his address to get ds in to one of them. Chances are we will be moving there sometime in the near future anyway but not before DS starts secondary.

As I said, I'm supposing nobody will be willing to help me cheat school admissions but it's worth a try. What do I need to do? Are we likely to pull this off? The other schools are not massively subscribed and I know of lots of people who have got into them without people checking up etc. Just that you have no chance if you're not actually in the catchment area. Especially when your catchment schools are so under-subscibed.

Can anyone advice me on this?

Please don't reply with a load of abuse, I'm just trying to do the best thing by my son.

OP posts:

edam · 08/04/2009 10:20

It's unfair because (in the South East, at least, and in some places I know up North) house prices go up around schools with a good reputation, so less well-off parents can't move there. Poorer families are priced out of decent schools in some places.

hippipotamiHasLost15Pounds · 08/04/2009 10:28

I agree with BIWO.

The system is the system. What would be grossly unfair is that a child, who lives just inside the catchment for the good school, who is just as sensitive as your ds, does not get a place because your ds got it instead by you cheating.

At the end of the day, you live where you live, them's the breaks.

So either move in with your dp and gain your place at the preferred school honestly. Then your ds does not have to lie and you don't need to worry about being found out.
Or send your ds to the failing school which may not actually be as bad as you think. Often these reputations grow arms and legs and people exaggerate the situation. Have you actually visited your nearest school?
Or let out your home and rent in the catchment area. That way your ds would be living nearer his new school mates too.

But please don't cheat. Because we are all trying to do the best for our children and one of those things is to teach them they cannot cheat and lie to get what they want, no?

seeker · 08/04/2009 11:30

magentadreamer - if your friend's catchment child had failed to get a place and you subsequently picked your child up from a friend's house that was well outside the catchment, I guarantee you would suddenly become extremely interested......

GrapefruitMoon · 08/04/2009 16:24

Edam, I'm not too far from you and it is getting worse. Our "catchment" school has become so popular in recent years that we don't have a hope of getting in even though it is our closest. Apart from the school you mentioned it looks like we'll have to go for a single sex school (which I have reservations about for ds1) or another underscribed mixed school too far away and to which no local kids go to....

edam · 08/04/2009 18:45

Miserable situation, Grapefruit. Wish you luck - you'll need it to battle Herts. CC, the swines.

nickschick · 08/04/2009 19:56

Hang on a minute ......my eldest 2 children go to a school well out of our catchment area- we wouldnt have got in had it not been for knowing someone - nobody is bothered where they live or anything - the trickiest part was keeping it under wraps until August- but I got my children in and rightly or wrongly thats what floats my boat!

Hulababy · 08/04/2009 20:25

Dn't forget that even if it is later, after your child has started, that someone shops you or the school/LEA find out - even then, even when your DS is at the school, the school can still ask you to leave because of cheating the system.

roisin · 08/04/2009 20:51

Don't cheat. Find a way to do it legally, or chance your luck - you never know, you might get in.

My ds1 got a surprise place at a non-catchment school this year. If he hadn't got in and we found out about someone who'd cheated to be allocated a place, we would be livid.

seeker · 08/04/2009 21:56

So I'm all right Jack and sod the rest of you. Wonderful example to the children. The world is in safe hands.

Sorrento · 08/04/2009 22:18

I'd move in with him, sounds like the push you both need to make a commitment and if it doesn't work and your boy already has his place you can't be called a liar.

nickschick · 08/04/2009 22:24

Not really seeker (if it was my comment that you are replying to) you just have to do whats best for your child and what you are capable of - as it were it worked for us and I know of at least 3 families who have appealed on the grounds that my ds got in.

I was fortunate enough to get a place without a lie but i think if id have had to lie I would.

skramble · 08/04/2009 22:32

I applied for the school I thought would suit my son better, we are outwith the catchment area, but we are in a funny catchment area in that we are in one council area and the school they are supposed to be in no one goes to from here but there is some sort of age old agreement they are in a catchment for another school in another council area, confused I am.

So I applied for DS to go to another school that a few here go to that I thought would be better for him, bit more academic and more rounded.

Didn't get a place, so DS goes to the one they all go to from here but still in another council area,(holiday dates get confusing as DD is at school in this council area). Its a more rural school catchment area covers loads of local villages and most lads seem to go back to working on farms or in trades. They don't even teach history.

BUT>>> he loves it and is doing so well, he is excelling in almost every subject and has discovered rugby, (never quite got football which seemed to alienate him from the other boys). Quiet glad he is their as all the kids from here go their and he is positivly flourishing like OP I thought he would be eaten alive but no it seems to have brought him on. He even had the confidence to make £2.51 on red nose day by going around at break and dancing to get money I would never have believed it he was so quiet.

Sorry to go on, but just wanted to tell a positive tale.

seeker · 09/04/2009 07:04

If by lying, or by "knowing somebody" (not sure how that works) you get your child into a school that they do not, by use of the proper admissions criteria, have a right to a place at, you are depriving the child whose rightful place that was. If that's not an example of I'm all Right Jack and Sod the Rest of You then I don't know what is. And I think it's outrageous. Yes, do the right thing by your child. But that means making the best of what is legitimately available, not teaching them to get what they want by any means possible.

foofi · 09/04/2009 07:16

I think I would move in your partner. That way you're not lying about anything.

seeker · 09/04/2009 07:39

"Darling, I would love for us to live together - that way little Billy will go to a better school"

foofi · 09/04/2009 08:21

He's already her partner, and he's already offered to let them use the address - he might be hoping she suggests moving in anyway!

seeker · 09/04/2009 10:09

"Chances are we will be moving there sometime in the near future"

But not before October.

fullmoonmum · 09/04/2009 15:19

I think you are in a terrible position
Seeker - I understand the points you are making because the system does suck but unless your child has suffered from being bullied it is hard to understand the awful effects upon the individual - I certainly didn't - it destroys their very happiness and self worth
Two thoughts - one positive and one negative
Some secondary schools ask for a counil tax form to be sent in on application
But - if your son has been bullied look at the admissions criteria - their may be a criteria for exceptional circumstances or pastoral need - you can apply specifically on these grounds but you will need supporting documentation from the primary school and if possible the ed psych
Good luck

MrsGuyOfGisbourne · 13/04/2009 13:08

Seeker - I totally sympathise. If you can't physically move there, can you get utility bills/council tax/child benefits in your name at that address? Your son is your priority, and he has a genuine need. (I know so many people who cheated on primary entry for no good reason, simply a more 'prestigious' primary , that your case seems positively straightforward)

mimsum · 13/04/2009 13:34

er, the OP isn't Seeker, MrsG, Seeker is getting very draughty on her incredibly moral high ground ...

RockinSockBunnies · 13/04/2009 13:52

Sympathies for the OP. Horrible situation to be in. I'd echo what other posters have said and try everything possible that's legitimate, before resorting to underhand tactics. If none of that is possible, then I'd try and do what's in the best interests of my child.

Seeker - maybe it is an 'I'm Alright Jack Attitude' but surely that's the kind of attitude most parents have in regards to their children. I know few people who would jeopardize their children's education and happiness for lofty principles. Furthermore, the system in this country in regards to education really doesn't work. So, unless we have radical changes in education, then people learn to play the system, as they do in all areas of life, not just education.

Whilst some kind of equal utopia would be lovely, it's not reflective of true life.

MrsGuyOfGisbourne · 13/04/2009 16:21

Sorry - got confused. My sympathies are totally with the OP.

rolledhedgehog · 13/04/2009 16:31

You are getting lots of support OP...of course if you did one of these posters' kids out of a place by fibbing they would be singing a different song!

marie1979 · 13/04/2009 23:13

i say look after number one and that is do what is right for your son.

cory · 14/04/2009 09:28

The problem is twofold.

As Seeker says, it will affect your son's social life. He will have to keep lying to his friends and will find it difficult to maintain a social life out of school. If he is sensititive and a likely target for bullies, living a lie will be a horrendous thing for him to do.

And you are accepting that your son is learning from you that looking after number one is the thing to do even if that involves telling a lie. So the day he gets the sack for having lied in his CV, you won't really have anything to complain about: you taught him that.

It's not just about moral grounds: the potential for later trouble seems fairly high to me.

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