Eldest is repeatedly getting "red comments" in her school diary about shouting out in class

[DeborahBorr]

She's in Y7 and getting quite a lot (increasingly recently) of "red comments" in her shcool planner. All on the same theme - being disruptive, shouting out, turning round to talk to her friends etc

They were predominantly from one teacher but there are now some from other teachers.

The school's sanctions are detentions, removal of ability to go on particular trips/rewards etc depending on number of comments

But what, apart from talking to her about it, should I be doing? Do I leave punishment for this type of behaviour with the school? I recently started to deduct pocket money from each comment but I'm not sure whether or not that's appropriate.

What have parents of other disruptive kids done at home? I could do with some advice here

Many thanks

It is up to the teachers to deal with it in the classroom, but maybe you could talk to her about WHY she is doing it.

Is she over eager to answer, is she bored, is she looking to impress a particular set of friends (I would tend towards this one at this age), is she playing the class clown, is she trying to get away from a 'swotty' image, are the class generally disruptive or is she on her own in this? etc etc. You are the one who knows her best and is most likely to get to the bottom of it.

May be there is nothing really serious at the bottom of it and she is just a busy noisy bouncy child who doesnt realise how difficult it is to move a class forward through constant disruption. I did have some success once with an older child who played the to the crowd constantly, when he was put in charge of teaching some younger kids football. Suddenly we were able to have a conversation of how it feels to be on the other end of disruptive behaviour. Its a stretch but if you think she is just not really aware of how she is coming over could you role play a situation where she has to try and give a talk and you act the disruptive child?

Finally I would say that obviously the school need sanctions to manage difficult behaviour but some positive rewards for good behaviour would also be useful. You could do this at home or maybe set something up with her tutor- if she has one. Might be worth having a proper chat with school to see how serious they think it is and what you can do together to sort it out.

Thanks for your reply cathpot.

The school do a rewards scheme as well. I think they are quite fair and positive about behaviour and she does get a lot of credits as well (way outnumbering her red comments, fortunately)

I think all of your suggestions as to why she does it are likely apart from being over eager to answer. She's not on her own but I do think her friends may be, on the whole, wiser about keeping their head down a bit more.

I'm hoping a lot of it is still settling down into secondary school. She has had an influential older friend warn her that she's in danger of getting labelled a bit by teachers, which may well last all the time she is at the school. Difficult to know how far along the line she is at being a complete pain. Oddly, at Parents' evening all her teachers were positive about her, not seeming to be overly-concerned about her talking (One was) She's academically able.
But the frequency of the comments has certainly increased in the last few weeks.

She is good at sport and I've tried to steer her towards that whenever school have suggested particular clubs etc but peer pressure seems to get in teh way here

I think you're right that I need to speak to someone at school without the business of a Parents' Evening

Hmm, yet another red comment today. Think I'm going to have to leave any action plan until after Easter now.

Anyone else had a continually talking and disruptive child?