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Secondary education

Connect with other parents whose children are starting secondary school on this forum.

Original poster

If your child is not academic/self motivated

29 replies

Cajoling55555 · 30/06/2026 19:52

How do you support a non academic child?

Currently in year 10. Needs 4 passes including English and Maths for college. English last mock was a 4, Science a 5,5 and Maths is under 4.

She has a tutor for maths but doesn’t do much at home. I just want her to finish year 11 and get the passes needed.Thinking of paying a tutor an extra hour/ 2 days so she sits down there to do the homework. Whatever it takes.

OP posts:
concertinacornflake · 01/07/2026 17:10

Cajoling55555 · 01/07/2026 07:45

Thank you all. Tutor is good and engaging; only started recently. I sent her the breakdown of her last mocks with topics, green, amber, red.

Maths worries me. I will keep encourage her to do the work the tutor sent. If that doesn’t work I will pay for an extra hours to do practice with her every week. Whatever it takes; DD just seem to need that structure at the moment to sit with someone else who isn’t DH or me; she just doesn’t seem to like working at home.

I'd do that - stop nagging for solo work and pay for more hours if you can.

If the tutor has only just started give it time. Ask the tutor how it's going.

Make sure you say many many times - it's great what you're doing with your tutor, I'm sure you can get the grades, I'm proud of you, you've got this, I'm so glad to see you trying.

Positive encouragement gets much better results than nagging or worrying.

Original poster
Cajoling55555 · 01/07/2026 20:38

concertinacornflake · 01/07/2026 17:10

I'd do that - stop nagging for solo work and pay for more hours if you can.

If the tutor has only just started give it time. Ask the tutor how it's going.

Make sure you say many many times - it's great what you're doing with your tutor, I'm sure you can get the grades, I'm proud of you, you've got this, I'm so glad to see you trying.

Positive encouragement gets much better results than nagging or worrying.

Show quote history

Thank you. I need to do more positive encouragement

OP posts:
Original poster
Cajoling55555 · 01/07/2026 20:41

ToadRage · 01/07/2026 16:59

Does your child get on well with the tutor? This makes a huge difference. My first two years at secondary school i had the school extra maths tutor who I really liked and helped me a lot, then she retired. I did not gel with the new tutor so my mum contacted the old one who still did private home tutoring and she tutored both my brother and I through our GCSE's.

Yes, she has clicked with this tutor. She had another one but I don’t think it was working

OP posts:
Original poster
Cajoling55555 · 04/07/2026 05:42

sparrowhawkhere · 01/07/2026 16:47

Does she have hobbies? A long commute? Why is she so tired?

She does have a bit of a commute, around one hour each way, door to door, wake up early. I don’t think she sleeps enough hours for a teenager. She goes out with friends, sometimes goes for walks or to the gym; but most time she just wants to chill, talk to her friends, watch things in Netflix or her mobile when she gets home.

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