dance

[FirmGoldJoker]

my daughter is 17 in her first year of college , she does 4 hours a week of dance classes a week contemparory , lyrical ,ballet and tap she wants to give up dance which im devestated about and so is her friend who she does it with .
she struggles with dance due to dyslexia and slow procesing disorder and hasnt been able to do her recent lyrical or contemparory exam as her teacher said she is progessing well but not remembering many of the steps , her old dance school teachers have also said simmilar and they always put her in with the younger years . in her school she wasnt even allowed to do lyrical due to not being able to keep up with the rest of her class .
she did audition to do alevel and betec dance at 3 sixth forms but she was told that she wasnt at a good standard to do it
its just so hard as it is what she loves but now she wants to give up due to all the setbacks

Dance can be a really difficult environment - now might be a good time for a reframe of what she can get out of it. What does she enjoy about it - performing, creating, or just the experience of movement? This can be a really interesting question for her to think about and then lean into whatever part it is that she enjoys about it in a different way. When I was that age, I found that teaching dance totally changed my perspective of dance and reignited some passion for it - if she’s interested then this might be a nice route for a way for her to stay involved in dance but to feel much more of a leader

@TeachWithMsL its affected her mental health so bad in the recent months i just want to see her happy again
she says she just likes to move along with the music . i asked her teacher if she could help out with the little ones but she has said no due to not being able to remeber routines

Enjoyment of movement is great - maybe you could encourage her to spend some time working through some improv or some self-choreographed work just for herself? also, I suspect it is highly unlikely that she wouldn’t be able to remember preschool/pre-primary and primary dance routines so it feels quite unreasonable of the teacher to say this - if the teacher isn’t willing to offer support or creative ideas then honestly it might be a good time to look for other dance studios because that isn’t a response I would expect from an educator of any kind

It sounds as if your daughter might be discriminated against based on disability. Does your daughter have an EHCP? What accommodations does she get? Have you asked for extra time, extra rehearsal time, visual prompts, simplified choreography or the like?

Is this all happening at her college or her dance school? If it is the dance school, I would try to find one that is more supportive. I knew two girls with disabilities who were very well supported by their dance schools. Not all dance schools are horrible.

There are a range of approaches here. Either she can manage it with extra supports and she does that. She could also accept that we can't be good at everything and this is not something she has the aptitude for, if that is the case no matter what supports she is given. I think we've all had at least one things we'd have loved to do but didn't have the talent for. She can still enjoy dance for the enjoyment of it.

I assume she's not looking for a career in dance? When my son was 17, he and his pre-professional classmates were doing 40+ hours of dance training a week, more if there were performances.

I have a dancing child (with Adhd).
2 things:

• you need another dance school - one with focus on recreational dance
• she doesn’t do nearly enough dance for a career in dance. not even remotely

For children (like mine!) who struggle learning routines, its all about repetition, repetition, repetition. They need to work s lot harder. And trying a dance exam if you can’t remember the routine is a recipe for diseaster

I don’t get this at all. She’s ready to give up her childhood hobby at 17, which is totally normal and later than many. My dd plans to drop to 2 classes from 4 next year because she’s realised she’s not got enough to be a professional dancer and just wants to do it for fun but be able to focus on GCSEs. She’ll likely stop all together once at 6th form. It’s like the end of an era but normal.

Maybe look at adult recreational classes if she just wants to have fun.

@TeenLifeMum It sounds like she wants to give up dance not because she doesn't like it anymore, but because she is not being supported. She could continue even if she doesn't want to be a professional dancer. Dance is great for fitness and health.

I don’t exactly understand what you are hoping for from this or what your question is. She’s a good age to work out what she wants to do after school and it sounds like she could use the time well to figure that out. She could certainly find any number of recreational dance classes if she enjoys it, but it seems like this is the end of dance in the academic sense.

I agree with a pp - she needs to find adult recreational classes. There will be people going to those who are at a whole range of levels including complete beginners. Everyone will be there to have a fun time, and there will be no 'pressure' to learn routines for exams or anything like that.