Agonising over secondary school choice

[Curlewwoohoo]

Just after some outside perspectives. We live in a market town with only one comprehensive. School 1. Most kids go here, they all cycle/walk. The only other option is a 30/40 min bus to a very small school in a village. School 2. DD wants school 2! DH and I are worried about the social impact of that decision.

Some details...

School 1 c3yrs ago joined a large MAT, got a new head, and has improved from RI to Good. Unfortunately we had a bad viewing, saw 1 group kids skipping class and got sworn at by another. We know there are a minority of kids who behave badly and concerned they could have a disproportionate impact if you're in contact with them. The kids are taught in form groups and not in sets. But we also know there are a majority of decent kids and actually it should be a fairly academic intake as many locals failed the 11+. 240/yr, 1108 at the school. We have plenty of friends in this situation and they'd all go to school together.

School 2 is very small, 528. 120/yr. No sixth form. Its in a 2 school MAT with an excellent school. Arguably it has better SEND provision although school 1 is improving in this regard. There is more pupil mixing between classes and across the school.

Results and other stats wise they are similar.

DD is dyslexic. She can find friendship groups slightly tricky. She loves school. I think she prefers school 2 because it's smaller, less intimidating looking around aged 10, there aren't the sixth formers who seem big and grown up, we didn't see the behavioural issues of school 1 but not naive to this. DH and I are concerned she might miss out on local friends, all walking to school together, able to go to clubs. If the schools were near each other we'd pick 2.

Having had my son commuting for nearly seven years, a 30-40 minute bus can easily turn into an hour or more door to door. We are all utterly sick of it. I would choose a school he could walk to in a heartbeat if it was a decent one. We didn't really have a local option.

Have you got time in half term to have a trial school run to School 2? (Including get out the house at half 7 etc).

I’d also be keener on School 1. Being able to walk and a closer friendship group made a massive difference to my kids.

Could you try a second visit? It might seem a bit less scary now you know the geography? Ask someone to speak to your daughter about her concerns?

Could do that next week!

We've been twice and know the school well through holiday clubs and sports. DD has also been to a settling in day.

Yes agree with others, what is the actual 8am commute? 30 mins total, or 10 min walk, 40 mins on bus, 10 min walk. That’s an hour and a real pain.

I went to school in a rural area with a long commute, as did DH, and we really wanted to avoid that for our DC. It’s not good for friendships.

Also - would you get a place at the smaller school?

What about GCSE options? Are they limited bc of size of school (tech, drama, music, how many MFL, triple science)?

Are there clubs - sports teams, band? Or is she not interested?

Will she not miss her local friends?

What about sixth form - she would have to move - where to? How would that feel?

Perhaps the thread title should have been, what do you do when your child wants one school over another but you're not convinced it's worth it?

The smaller school has 2 mfl and 2 science. The bigger school has 1 mfl and 3 science. Dds not into languages or science especially. She likes humanities. The 6th form in the local school is not doing very well. DD currently says she wants to go to local rural college after school. Yes she likes clubs, it is a consideration for sure. She isn't swayed by friendships and can be quite singular about what she wants and thinks.

You decide as parents if you think it's worth to go with the second choice or not.

I’m a school two fan, bigger is not better. A happy child will learn better.
No reason to not maintain the current friendships.
Yes, she needs to try the commute to see if it’s okay.

As a parent of a Year 7 child about to end the first half term, we are so glad he can walk in 10 mins. He passed 3 grammars and although another school was ‘better’ in some factors, it was a long bus journey home.

If school 1 is improving and most local children are going there, I’d go for that. Do not underestimate how tired they can be after school and will have so much more time for relaxing/homework. Also more flexibility on after school clubs, local friends etc.

You need to make the ultimate decision for a 10 year old. Also remember the back and forth you’ll have to do for parents evenings and other events.

I would definitely try the commute together. If it’s just theoretical at the moment she won’t have a good sense of what it’s like to travel that far. Having said that, some kids are fine with this kind of distance and will do homework on the bus.

For me the major consideration would be behaviour. Your dd is very sensibly put off by the disruptive behaviour she has seen. Have a look at parent view on the Ofsted portal and try as much as possible to talk to current parents at both schools. That will help you to get a clear picture of how bad behaviour is in each school. In school 1 the fact that all lessons are with the form will make it very difficult if her form aren’t great - there will be no escape.

Just to add, my DC go to a large mixed comprehensive. It would be unheard of for current students to swear at prospective parents so to me that is fairly worrying.

It is very often the case that a larger school has more experience/provision for SEN such as dyslexia.
Also, a larger school will have a bigger potential pool of friends.
IId lean towards 1 unless she is desperate for a fresh start

School 1 has historically had a RI Ofsted for poor SeN support and poor reading progression. School 2 has a better rep for dyslexia.

the main issue with the second school is travel as local friends shouldn’t come into it

and then exactly what it is about school 1 she doesn’t like

yes you are the adults but she is the one who will be at the school you need to listen to her as well and work out whst are concerns you can overcome and what are genuine preferences

Hmm so school one is better for science but school two better for MFL, so pretty even. I wouldn't set too much store on what she does and doesn't like rn – she is in primary school, she has minimal experience of science or MFL.

What about other GCSE options – what sort of range is there? Are CS, DT (food, textiles, RM), drama, music, PE routinely offered? Any extras at either like sociology or further maths?

Yes don't underestimate the commute for you when needed as well. How far away is it – 30 min bus ride could be 4-5 miles for sure, which is not very much and a 15-min drive.

You can probably tell I would go for the bigger local school – those two things were important to me and DH, both having attended as I say far away and relatively small schools (mine was the size of your smaller option, DH's smaller still).

If you do lean towards school 2 I would certainly try the commute over half term.

Listen to your gut. Aside
30-40 mins is not a long commute for secondary in, say, London - but I suppose it might be different in a rural area if there are fewer buses etc.

I am team School 1. You cannot beat.lpcal friends, easy commute and active travel in my opinion.

School 2 has lots of considerations against it - long commute and lots more potential for delays, cancellations, forgotten pe kit or food tech ingredients and if they're ill you have much further to go plus for parents eve, dentist etc. Plus if she wants to do clubs, play rehearsals etc.

If she struggles socially smaller is not always better- smaller pool and less local friends means less opportunities to meet out of school

500 is a very small school - are they able to do plays, fields sports teams, do dofe etc?

I went to a school that was a massive pita 1 hr to get to (grammar school). It was incredibly annoying but I was very very happy at the school so would make the same choice again.

We were 600 + 6th form (so 700 ish) and it didn't feel small at all. The HT knew everyone well and it was great. There were no big behaviour issues, some of the things I hear about sound unbearable re disruptive students.

It was also annoying that all my friends lived a good distance from me but I did a lot of extra curricular stuff so wasnt bored In the evenings

I would take a morning off school and catch the bus to school 2 so she can see what it really means to catch a bus everyday

Probably can't do that as it's a school bus. But we could follow it in the car.

School bus actually makes a difference as less I would assume penalties for being late as multiple people would be and it is at a fixed time so they would have decided it to get there on time.

is the bus stop near? And assume she would travel with others from the school

There are 2 dedicated school bus routes from my town to school 2, both routes have stops 5-10 mins walk from the house and go directly into the school.

How about getting home if she stays late for extracurricular etc?