Would you consider swearing to be the norm in Y7 of secondary school?

[SurprisedM]

I have a DS who has recently started Year 7 of secondary school. The school was rated as requiring improvement in several areas by Ofsted in its most recent inspection (2022). DS has said that he has witnessed multiple instances of other pupils swearing during breaks or in the corridors. He has heard fuck, shit and various offensive words, some of which could be considered as homophobic or misogynistic. I am slightly aghast 😱at this behaviour, particularly coming from 11 year olds. Is this the norm nowadays or would you expect this not to be happening at a good school? It's a state school in a relatively deprived area in NW England.

It was completely normal when I was that age 40 years ago.

Why are you aghast?

This has always been very normal. When I was at school in the 90's there were lots of year 7's that already smoked.

Normal and was normal in the 80s when I was that age.

Its very naive to think that children a lot younger than 11 are not exposed to foul language through media, gaming, music, books and yes their peers.

The "nicer" childten know not to do it infront of parents etc. They others have parents who don't care about it.

Yes

DH (late 60s) came home on his first day at a rural primary school and told his mother to fuck off. I can imagine how shocked she was!

DS (late 30s) came home from his first day at an outstanding infant school in a leafy suburb, and said the same thing to me, adding another swear word for good measure.

I told DS not to swear at home in front of his younger siblings. However, I used to hear him swearing in the garden with his friends.

Swearing at secondary school hardly comes as a shock!

Normal even in nice MC schools.

I thought I was naive! I do think going from primary to secondary school is a massive adjustment and I always think how do we have great primary schools even in some of the most deprived areas and some truly awful secondary schools in good areas?
DD2 started sleepwalking which was a result the truma of going to secondary, the stress of worrying about getting a detention was making her so anxious.
She left in year 11 and never got a single one!

We all swore like right little guttersnipes at grammar school, in the 1970s.

Bit naive of you OP. Next you’ll be telling us you’ve never heard of pegging..

Out of the earshot of adults? Or course it’s normal.
You could be talking about 17 year olds. Of course they swear.

Well, the context is importantly.

i work at a very ordinary state secondary.

It’s quite normal to overhear students getting a bit sweary in their general interactions with each other.

But swearing at each other in anger, at or around staff at all, or in any way audibly in public is absolutely not accepted and is duly sanctioned.

Normal, DD is at a very good state school in a leafy area and they all swear from the get go. They also all swore in the private school I attended in 1990s.

Normal unfortunately. Especially year 7s who start to feel a bit cool.

DD1 came home from residential secondary school one Friday. She asked me what was “tea bagging”, which she’d overheard some older boys talking about? She’d asked the staff, but they told her

”We don’t want to hear that kind of language from you DD1!”

DH and I had never heard the expression either and had to look it up!

Very normal, I am a secondary teacher! I will always call them out on it and log bad language on the behaviour system, but with social media, tick tock, YouTube… it’s where they get it from and it is very normal.
I swore like anything when I was at school, to fit in, never at home!! I turned out fine, I swear like a trooper at home and when no students are around…! I always say to my students, nobody expects you to NEVER swear, but you need to be disciplined about controlling your language in different situations…

Yeah totally normal. I hear them all the time walking to and from school swearing.
Lots of vaping too sadly.

Considering that they all have TikTok swearing is the least of the worries! My Year 7s are really sweet and innocent on the whole (one is really upset as a teacher talked about Father Christmas being a myth and they believed). I know for sure that many of them
will swear - they are totally distanced from the fact it is a 'naughty word' as they hear them so often.

I have been asked who decides what words are swear words!

Yes, totally normal. And not only amongst naughty kids.

Unless you went to secondary school in a very different culture, I’m amazed that you’re surprised! I was at a very naice home counties secondary at the turn of this century and we all swore like troopers (out of earshot of the teachers). And I was one of the ‘good’ kids. We all turned out ok! I now make my living with words and consider the odd well-timed expletive to be part of the richness of the language - so I’m not teaching my preteen DC to never swear, but rather to use it judiciously and appropriately for better effect 😁

I also think there’s a difference between the odd swear word in conversation and swearing AT someone in an aggressive way - I don’t tolerate the latter from my DC at all.

Normal and normal in the past. I’m early 40s and our school was far worse.

In my experience, Koreans are not only willing to swear but do so with enthusiasm, pride and creativity.

The kids in my quiet little village school were swearing like troopers from year 4. In the 1980s.

Sadly I think it starts earlier than that 😩. My seven year old came home from his highly regarded, oversubscribed primary yesterday and told me “the naughty boys in Y6 say s-h-i-t to each other in the playground when the teachers can’t hear”! This is London so bit of a mixed catchment but still!