Sen child - boarding school

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I am really a stressed mum, I’ve spent the last 11 years taking care of my dear daughter who has an adhd diagnosis, it is a constant battle and impacts all of our lives because of her diagnosis. I have done everything, and more to help her- as I should as a parent. There is nothing else I can do. My brother suggested boarding. I can’t afford that, she doesn’t have an ehcp. However is due to start high school this year and we are hoping that realistically she gets an ehcp which may open doors for a boarding school.

my question is, if my daughter is awarded an ehcp, are there any boarding schools that can help with funding through the ehcp. I could probably afford 10k a year

My understanding is that an EHCP will specify a school and, if that is a specialist private school, all fees would be covered.

It’s far more likely that a state school of some kind would be specified.

I’ll be honest, it’s very very unlikely to get a sen boarding school if she hasn’t even gone a ehcp at 11. Having had 2 dds with Sen (one autistic, one ADHD) I know parenting isn’t easy but the state doesn’t pay for boarding except in very complex situations. One option there is though you may have missed the boat is state boarding schools, at these the education is free but you pay for the boarding element, no idea of the cost but it’s worth investigating, my dd boarded for 6th form and loved it but had a specialist bursary and that school has since closed, we paid £4K per year for boarding

The type of school named in Section I of an EHCP, if she were to have one, would be based on the type of education she needs, rather than the other 130 odd hours in the week. It can be difficult to prove a case for residential as children do not all benefit from or require a waking day curriculum. Additionally, the cost to a Local Authority can be extremely high - parents are not expected to pay - and so LAs are reluctant to name residential other than in the most extreme situations.
Does she need an EHCP? If so, meet the SENCOS early in the autumn term and get the ball rolling asap, as it is not a fast process. You can also apply yourself for a statutory assessment.

in My area it’s extremely difficult to get a place in a Sen school even for children with high need who have had ehcps /funding for years. Some people end up home schooling.
Saying that You could possibly get a Sen school depending on her level of need which may help as if she is happier there her behaviour may improve.

I have never heard of anyone getting funding for boarding school. I know a couple of people who relinquished their rights and social services now fund full time respite. One child is in a care facility and the other is currently in an air bnb with two full time carers at a time. But these are severely disabled children who are extremely violent and cannot access education in any form. They are both non verbal and in nappies.

I think that boarding school would be incredibly hard for a child with adhd. Relationship ending hard. Although I can understand why you might want this if you’re at the end of your patience.

My ds with adhd barely keeps it together through a 9-3 school day and the stress of being in school affects the rest of his life quite significantly. Being in school Monday to Friday would be impossibly hard for him.

Of you have 10k a year to spend privately I would spend 5k of it on private occupational therapy. If even a bit of it works, it will improve not only your life but also your child’s. We use the key clinic. For some people it has been life changing for us, I wouldn’t describe it like that but we have seen a noticeable sustained improvement which has endured.

I would spend the other 5k on really regular respite. Find a good babysitter and book them one morning and one evening a week. With them covering everything from both morning and evening routine. Once they know your daughter well book them for a full week each year. PGL also take neurodivergent kids and if she can cope with it, that would give you some annual respite.

Residential placements can be funded. However, you would need watertight evidence that it was required. And you would probably still have to appeal.

You can request an EHCNA yourself now. You don’t need to wait for DD to start secondary. On their website, IPSEA has a model letter you can use.

Is DD on medication?

Have you requested social care assessments? If not, Contact has model letters you can use.

I have 2 children who go to schools that have boarding and I also work at one of them.

I may have misunderstood, but you seem to be asking about ‘mainstream’ boarding rather than a specialist placement. Apologies if I am wrong.

As a previous poster said, boarding can be extremely difficult for some children who are neurodivergent. Children are supported to a point, but are expected to be able to follow simple rules and guidelines. Boarding houses are not prisons and a level of cooperation and responsibility is expected to keep everyone safe.

I have known a number of children who have not been suitable for boarding and were either not offered a place, or lost their place, because of it.

Mainstream boarding school is definitely not the right place for a child with behavioural issues and they would be unlikely to offer a place. They are not set up with resources for that, and they would have to consider the impact not only on your child but the others in the boarding house.

That's not to say that there won't be children boarding who aren't also ADHD, ASD etc but it tends to be the sort that doesn't really impact on behaviour in a big way (DD is ADHD but it affects her focus and she's pretty angelic at school... less so at home!)

I was a boarder and they definitely managed out children with hard-to-control behaviour. And to be fair the kids weren't particularly happy living with all the rules, life being run by bells and strict schedules either.

State boarding is about 15-25k a year depending on the school.

But places are very highly sought after, especially now with VAT on private fees. Some are also academically selective and/or grammars.

A lot of the places go to children whose parents are in the military and need the stability. There are generally forms and interviews to assess boarding suitability and priority goes to children who need the place rather than just parental desire. (My siblings and I went to a state boarding school partly due to parents jobs making it a better fit for us).

Don't listen to whoever says it's not possible. Lots of kids don't have EHCPs at 11 and have significant needs and go onto specialist provision. You can name a mainstream boarding school as well as SEN. There are kids with EHCPs at mainstream state and private boarding schools. Lots of options. For a lot of parents in your situation they are a saving grace as kids like your daughter really struggle to switch from home to school mode.

My DS1 boarded for several years at a specialist independent school, which was fully funded by his EHCP.

However this was not at all easy to obtain. He’s had an EHCP since he was 4 years old. He started off in mainstream state with full-time 1:1. This broke down and no other state provision was offered in spite of the LA still claiming his needs could be met in mainstream. One particularly charming LA officer even informed me that she didn’t believe he needed an EHCP at all.

We paid for private mainstream, in spite of him having an EHCP, for three years until it became clear that he had to go into the special system. At this point our LA tried to plonk him in a 330-students-in-a-year mainstream comp and get him to miss ten minutes of every lesson every day and learn through the window. We started down the tribunal process until the LA conceded and agreed to specialist boarding. In his case though, the boarding was agreed due to a combination of his need for a waking curriculum and also the school being too far away for easy daily transport.

I think there’s a misconception that if you get an EHCP, it will instantly name the school of your choice and all costs will be funded. It’s far more complicated than that unfortunately.

To be completely honest, you got mugged off, as many people do and what you've described it illegal. There is definitely a misconception that EHCP= you get what you want though. That's not true. Many many EHCPs aren't worth the paper they're written on. And whilst there is little to no chance that OPs child would get a boarding placement straight away, its very possible with a tribunal and with the right evidence eg need for respite care or evidence of child struggling with home to school transition and risk of vulnerability in local community. The deciding factor is the burden on the public purse. If you can prove that the cost of her staying local is more than the cost of boarding, it's an easy enough win. The school placement doesn't have to be perfect for your child, the law only states that the school has to meet the child's needs, not give them the perfect school. If the local school can do that, than the onus is on the parent to prove that the school they are requesting is not an unreasonable use of public funds. That's when you show the true cost, because LAs make it sound like state schools are free and the parent is asking for an expensive moon. In reality a mainstream boarding school could actually work out cheaper than a local mainstream school. My DDs current state school placement is actually more expensive than her old very expensive private school as she needs a TA and SALT. The important thing to remember is these things all take time and unless you're lodging an appeal for a placement in a key stage transfer eg Y6-Y7, you're looking at a min 1 year wait for a tribunal date.

To be completely honest, you got mugged off

Charming!

Is she on ADHD meds?
Boarding tends to be very hard on ND kids….do you want the boarding for her or for you?