Top boys and girls private schools

[Queenspark2016]

Hi everyone and thank you in advance for taking the time to read this!

My son is 9 (yr4) and my daughter is 7 (yr3). Both are academic and all rounders thriving at a south of england private school.

My work and my husband’s allow us to work anywhere so we are fully open to moving to London or elsewhere in the South of England to get them a place in top academic private schools.

Can anyone recommend specific schools and a set up that would work well for this? Ideally co ed for our son and single gender for our daughter. Close together and both academically focussed with excellent university admissions for Oxbridge or similar universities?

Has anyone moved for schools? Had kids start at different times? We’re relatively clueless! Please help!

Top means different things to different people.
Some families choose nurturing, enjoyable sports/music/drama and friendships over strictly grades.

You’re right, it’s subjective! My kids are naturally academic so grades are definitely important in(but inspiring a love of learning is probably more important to us) and also nurturing and not a hot house, encouraging of being all rounders! Friendships are super important too but guessing that’s one gamble wherever you send your kids?

Brighton College? www.brightoncollege.org.uk/

Presumably day schools?

Tbh 'top' is so personal. I've just had boy and girl relatives finish at King's School Canterbury, though they were boarding. They loved the school and have done brilliantly. But the school was hand-picked for them, particularly for the music provision and the pastoral care, but also for what for want of a better word I'll just call 'vibe'. The academics have been great too. I don't think there is a substitute for going to visit.

If I were just going to say 'Alexa find me a top single sex mainly day provision private school for an academic girl' I would guess that Oxford High might come out near the top. But for your set up maybe sending them to both the St Paul's would work?

brighton had crossed my mind but seems to come up less in what i’ve read. Does anyone have experience of the school? Is there a girl’s equivalent school?

Thanks so much for this! Yes I should have clarified-we’re looking for day schools really. St Pauls would be amazing. Do people tend to get an instinctive feel for the right school for their children by visiting schools? Open days or separately arranged visits?

I have a relative at Brighton College. Seems to be a great school and the facilities are outstanding (we’ve been to watch a few sport/drama/music events there). Not sure if there’s a girl’s equivalent but there’s Burgess Hill Girls and Roedean are close by (although I think both might suit less academic kids).

Bedes and Hurst also come up a lot but I’ve no direct experience.

I know I shouldn't post because I didn't send my child to a private school... but I considered it. I'd make a shortlist using the Good Schools Guide then come back here to refine the list, then visit. Tbh I think you might have quite a short list since you want two different schools close together

Personally I quite like open days as imo when a school is supposedly giving you its best side, the results can be quite telling. But maybe that works better for state schools. I'd arrange visits that work for you - you havent got much time left this year to visit.

Why not just look at a league table? If you’re after something like St Paul’s it’s easy to see top academic results.

You’re all so kind giving these suggestions, I’m extremely grateful and absolutely taking it all on board

Well, having mentioned Oxford High, the school I genuinely thought about trying to get ds into was Magdalen College School. Both definitely at the hot house end of the market but great schools nonetheless.

Are you from the uk? The ‘top’ public schools, especially boys, are pretty well known. They’ve all got a slightly different reputation. Look at the Times list for academics. Buy the good schools guide. Ask around. And yes, you and dcs do tend to get a feel of fit when you visit- the key thing to think about is can I see my dcs making friends here and do I want my dc to turn out like these kids.

Be careful of relying on mumsnet - most people only have direct experience of a couple of schools and will suggest them. You are better off asking if people have experience of a particular school and then you will hear both sides.

Academic results are incredibly important, especially Oxbridge admissions, but it mustn't be a hot house, and must produce all-rounders with a love of learning? I'm afraid you have to pick which of those two aspects is most important to you.

Any school that chases a top ten league table position will need your child to also produce those same exam results in order to keep that position.

Fwiw if you really do want ultra academic, then I'd consider a super selective grammar (ie a grammar school that has no catchment area criteria, no siblings rule, everything rests on the 11+)

Top London girls schools:
St Pauls Girls School
City of London School for Girls
North London Collegiate
Haberdashers Girls School- there is an excellent boys school on the same campus.

Also worth looking at Highgate which is co-ed.

All these schools are notoriously hard to get into so you will need to have a non / less selective backup plan.

If they are independent learners then Sevenoaks School may suit. It’s co ed

There’s academic and academic.

anywhere that chases high grades some people will consider a hot house.

personally I chose a more relaxed school as I didn’t want my DD placed under massive amounts of pressure. Some girls would cope well with it but she wouldn’t have and she was much better off at a more traditional school with lots of music and extra curricular.

you need to consider personality/character as well.

Most good schools will enable your dc to get the grades they are capable of, if they are are very able they don’t need to be at a ‘top’ school to get the highest grades. Equally if they are less academic a ‘top’ school won’t enable them to get straight 9s if it’s beyond their capability.

Beyond what others have about the dangers of focusing too much on rankings by academic results, given that you have two kids at different stages, I'd suggest your DS applying for schools where there are suitable schools for your DD with different levels of entry requirements so as to make the move too much of a gamble. Unless that you manage to find an all through girls school with an occasional vacancy. London is an obvious choice in terms of options but also tends to be more competitive and it obviously also depends on your budget for moving.

The Perse school in Cambridge is very academic. Cambridge is an expensive place to live if you don’t need to be here though.

Hammersmith is excellent for academic private schools:
St Paul’s Girls & Boys school
Latymer Upper (mixed)
Godolphin & Latymer (girls)
You have many lovely areas in which to live where those school are a 20 min max bus ride or cycle away…Chiswick, Brook Green, Barnes, Fulham, Putney.

You’ve then also got Kings College School (Boys) in Wimbledon, Wimbledon High School & Putney High School (both girls & part of GDST).

All regularly feature high up in the league tables & can be reached easily & quickly by public transport. Lots of choice & often discussed on the annual ‘SW london independents’ type threads under Secondary Education

Brighton is mixed boys and girls.

St Paul’s boys and St Paul’s girls are two different schools. Not so far apart but not in the same site.

If you are focused on academic results, then look at the Sunday Times Top 100 league tables.

If you specifically want one mixed school and one single sex girls school near each other, then look at Latymer Upper in Hammersmith for mixed and Godolphin & Latymer / St Paul’s Girls which are both nearby for single sex. Otherwise Westminster will be fully coed by the time your DC are the right age. In North London there is NLCS which is girls only and Highgate that is mixed but they aren’t as close in distance.

Then consider the reality that it’s incredibly difficult to get into these schools. However bright your children are, you will need to do some level of tutoring for the entrance test.

That may be you supporting your child yourself and doing work with them in preparation for the exams. You may need to get external additional tutors. I have two children at two of these schools and it is a total arms race. Every parent hates the system but perpetuates it, and it’s getting worse every year. The difference the right prep school makes in helping get ready for the 11/13 plus exams is also massive from our experience of two different prep schools.

And it’s a fact that the top schools are all hot houses. Some children thrive in that kind of environment, others don’t. A school can be both a hot house and nurturing because they’ve tried to select children that will succeed in that atmosphere. But of course, there will always be a few that don’t.

Sorry for the long message but I would really go into this with your eyes open, get as much info online as you can and try to work out if this is what you really want!

Oh, and don’t forget what it will cost to live within a 30 minute commute of Hammersmith too (on top of the fees!)