Here's the feedback my DC was given by MarkMyPapers. I thought it was well targeted.
Paper, Board, Ref: English Language Edexcel IGCSE Option B
Assessment notes:
Q1. 1 mark (out of 1)
Q2. 1 mark (out of 1)
Q3. 5 marks (out of 10) - You need to fully explain how your chosen evidence demonstrates the writer’s ideas and consider specific choices of language/structure. Questions focusing on ‘How does the writer?’ need you to also comment on writer techniques. Consider DAFOREST, direct address, alliteration, facts, opinion, repetition, emotive language, statistics and rule of three. All these technqiues can be used by a writer to convey meaning. For example, statistics give a sense of authority to a piece of writing, direct address makes a reader sit up and take notice, emotive language excites emotion – all these are skills a writer uses to manipulate his reader so ‘HOW?’ questions need to consider the techniques the writer has drawn upon. Also remember PETER – point, evidence, technique, explanation and effect it has on the reader – consider this when structuring your answer then you will fully develop each point you make.
Q4. 1 mark (out of 1)
Q5. 1 mark (out of 2) – you need to make it clear that the ‘high metal gates’ are locked.
Q6. 5 marks (out of 10) – you have picked out some examples of how they might feel such as ‘horrified’ and ‘dazed excitement’ but mostly you have listed evidence without really exploring how this creates an impression or suggests Ashok and Eketi’s feelings. You need more explanation to support and explain your evidence. Once again, think of the techniques a writer uses to control the reader’s reactions.
Q7. 7 marks (out of 15) - You have considered both language choices and structural elements of the two texts as a point of comparison, including identifying some use of rhetorical devices. Well done. You haven’t really stated what your evidence suggests about the writers’ different ideas and perspectives. For every piece of evidence you select consider why the writer has included this and what it suggests about their personal views. Again, when you quote evidence from the text you then need to support it with a developed explanation. Think PETER – it is not enough to think the evidence will support itself. You need to explain why. If you do this your answer will be more developed and improve your mark.
Q8. 7 marks for reading/understanding (out of 10); 8 marks for communication (out of 12) and 6 marks for SPaG (spelling and grammar) (out of 8). You have used devices such as rhetorical questions and direct address to the reader, as well as a variety of sentences and paragraphs. You have addressed all three bullet points integrating these throughout your writing. Include a wider range of persuasive techniques in order to convince your reader of the validity of your viewpoint. Try to include a wider range of vocabulary choices, particularly low frequency lexis (words used less often in speech and writing). I have given a link to a list here. You can’t be expected to know all these words but a few will improve the quality of your writing. Make sure you use them appropriately so try to learn their meanings.
https://www.vocabulary.com/lists/176046Q9.
Q9. 11 marks for communication (out of 20) and 8 marks for SPaG (out of 10). Watch that you don’t miss out small words when you are writing at speed – I know this is difficult but if you have time, check your work at the end of the exam and look out for missing words. You consider the implications of what ‘home’ actually represents giving a range of examples, with some nice points on the importance of family and community. Well done. To develop your response further, you should also consider possible counter arguments to the statement given i.e. when is a home simply bricks and mortar?
Total of 61 marks out of 100 i.e. 61% = Grade 7