2 day suspension for vile attack

[Poptart22]

My 13 year old niece was physically attacked at school by her ex best friend. The bully had threatened that she was planning to do this a week earlier, which we informed school of and pleaded with them to keep her safe, however the attack happened on school grounds a week later.

Some other pupils filmed the attack in which my niece can clearly be heard saying several times she did not want to fight, and did not retaliate once. The attack was vicious, she was repeatedly kicked and punched before eventually the teachers arrived.

My niece had to attend A&E. Police were informed who advised she can press charges, but we haven’t yet. However they went and warned the bully to leave her alone.

School suspended the bully for a measly 2 days. She has returned and continued harassing my niece, commenting on her weight and laughing about the attack.

To make matters worse my niece is a looked-after child in the care of her grandparents, with an already troubled and traumatic past.

I wrote a very angry email and attached the vile video of the fight to the headmaster asking why the attack was able to happen on school grounds when we warned them, why the punishment was so weak (in my opinion), and requested that the bully be excluded.

Today I received a phone call from the safeguarding officer advising ‘teachers can’t have eyes in the back of their head’ and that the punishment is pretty standard, as ‘fights happen all the time’. Also tried to put some blame on my niece for failing to report all ongoing incidents of harassment.

In my opinion, if the bully had been properly punished, the harassment would not be continuing.

Im planning on requesting a meeting with the head, since he hasn’t bothered responding to my email.

Where do I stand on this?

My niece is terrified to go to school and completely humiliated.

(I am dealing with this on behalf of my mother who is in her 70’s and struggling to cope).

There's been lots of good advice here from school governors on how to escalate this complaint.

Regarding formally complaining to the police, your 70 year old mother is not helping matters by letting the bully get away with it. If she's genuinely scared of retaliation then this forms part of your conversation with the police. She keeps vigilant, communicates with you daily, gets a ring doorbell, whatever needs to happen but do not allow her to let your niece down due to fear. If they did retaliate then this would be further evidence for the police. Record and document everything. The fact your niece is a LAC means she's vulnerable and needs additional support and safeguards. Please model to her how to stand up to bullies.

It would be useful in threads like these if teachers who appear to be simply shrugging their shoulders actually said “The situation is wrong and shit but there’s nothing the school can do” because otherwise it’s just mindless parroting and doesn’t inspire confidence in our educators.

This was an assault by a child who is over the age of criminal responsibility. That our school system is such that this child isn’t subject to an immediate expulsion is appalling. And I don’t think this is all down to 14 years of the Tories either.

Maybe the school doesn't have the power to permanently exclude or do xyz.

But they do have the power to be sympathetic, caring, and make parents feel heard and respected in their communication.

They have chosen not to do that either.

If people think schools aren’t dealing with these children correctly and just shrugging their shoulders, volunteer to become a school governor and sit on exclusion panels. Then you will see what many educators are trying to tell you

According to the OP, the police told her she could. So the OP or the police are misinformed if that’s the case.

Follow the complaints process, press charges, but also (and I doubt this will be popular advice) get her to the gym and teach her to throw a punch. I used to get battered at school on a regular basis, and the best thing I did was learn to defend myself. Make it crystal clear she isn’t to start any fights, but she can fight back and that you and her GPs will back her up if she gets in trouble.

Either way, it’s an important distinction.

In England and Wales a victim can’t press charges

www.lawtonslaw.co.uk/legal-processes/can-police-press-charges-if-victim-doesnt-consent-in-the-uk/

Do you really think that two days off for the bully followed by the victim having to face their bully laughing at them daily is "dealing with the situation"? And a member of SLT then victim blaming to the guardians? Because lets be honest - that is how it will present to the victim, the bully and all the pupils around them.

Problems with systemic bullying cultures in schools are not specific to certain types of school, to school funding or even education philosophies. The biggest singl influence is the quality of leadership in the school and the ethos they build.

Oh and yes I am a governer - of a school where the leadership team don't shrug and say its all too hard or too expensive to keep pupils safe.

The school should def have suspended the girl for making threats. And stronger punishment for attacking. Perhaps week in school suspension (so she is not on her mobile at home).

Definitely press chàrges especially since the bully is continuing to do this after the attack. Might be the only way the little CF learns. Also I hope your neice is ok I would be horrified if this happened to mine

you can’t ‘press charges’ in England, this is driving me mad

Or the OP is mistaking what she/he was told (more likely)

You cannot press charges in England/Wales. That is not how our legal system works.

I wonder whether the confusion with pressing charges is that the police have asked for a witness statement and that is what the grandparent is saying no to. With no witness statement might be hard for the police to convince CPS

A witness statement isn’t the same as charges being pressed (although it sounds like you know this). It’s simply to aid the police in furthering the case.

But I wish posters would stop posting ‘PRESS CHARGES OP’ because it gives a false impression that the victim decides whether the case goes to court.

With a PEX there are 2 conditions that need to be fulfilled

1. A permanent exclusion is when a pupil is no longer allowed to attend a school (unless

the pupil is reinstated). The decision to exclude a pupil permanently should only be taken: • in response to a serious breach or persistent breaches of the school's behaviour policy; and • where allowing the pupil to remain in school would seriously harm the education or welfare of the pupil or others such as staff or pupils in the school.

It's the second condition that will likely be challenged at an appeal.

Obviously, the perpetrator has continued to harass the victim. Unfortunately, you can't change a suspension to a PEX. But if harassment continues it could fall within both of the above conditions.

So this behaviour needs to be reported every time it occurs

I don't think the school has acted well towards OP and therefore a complaint would be justified, but do need to follow the complaint policy. When in a meeting need to talk about safeguarding your niece. Do not ask about or demand punishments for the perpetrator.

@Wildflowers99 I posted a link earlier about pressing charges by a victim is not a thing. I was just trying to work out how the confusion may have arisen with the OP

Not dealt with though as the harassment has continued since she returned.

To those asking why we haven’t pressed charges, my mother (DN’s legal guardian) was afraid to in case of any backlash from the girls parents/family. She is in her 70’s and struggling to cope. I have offered to support DN through the process of pressing charges.

Update from the school:
This morning the safeguarding officer called me back, following our chat yesterday. She told me that at the time when the head made the decision to suspend for two days, he had not seen the CCTV/recorded footage of the attack, and believed it was just another fight. To me that is astonishing, surely he should have reviewed all the facts?

However, following my email in which I attached a video of the attack, he now feels he has ‘all the facts’ and has agreed to bring the bully into his office today to give a formal warning that if one more incident occurs, she will receive severe punishment that COULD result in permanent exclusion. Her mother will also be advised this.

Bit frustrating I had to push so hard for this but feels like they are finally taking it a bit more seriously.

The police advised her that she could press charges if she wants to, and that if she changes her mind later she still can. So they did definitely give her the option

Op, that wouldn’t have happened. We do not press charges in this country, ever. They might’ve said ‘you can provide a statement’ or ‘we will take your wishes into consideration’, but we do not press charges. It’s an Americanism from watching too many crime dramas.

https://www.lawsociety.org.uk/topics/blogs/no-gavels-please-were-british

no one in England and Wales can press charges, unless one counts private prosecutions.

Maybe tell the OP then, just a thought.

See above.

Phew!