Advice

[TheAdeptZebra]

My daughter has been to school today and a teacher has called her and idiot and pathetic is this acceptable. I know my child's behaviour isn't perfect but I need advice on what I can or if I can do anything

How reliable is she? What was the context?

Honestly it depends what she’s done.

I agree a child should not be called an idiot or pathetic. However she may have done something pretty serious - for example, if she did something that put others in danger in order to impress someone.

In which case I could kind of understand these words being used and I would be focusing more on her behaviour than the words used.

No it isn't acceptable.
It may not have been quite as your daughter said. That doesn't mean she's lying. For example the teacher might have said something like, "Don't be an idiot" or " You can choose to be an idiot or you can choose a different way"

I'm not suggesting this is ideal, but it's a lot less bad than , "You're an idiot," imo.

I would contact the teacher and ask what happened.

I have a video recording of the teacher calling her an idiot and pathetic.

What had she done?

Context matters here.

If she stabbed another student the teacher was probably being restrained.

What did she do first?

I've heard students called a lot worse (secondary)

My first question would be to ask what she'd just done

They had put her in what they call resolve and she said she needed to go class get her work the teacher then said you don't need to as u won't do it your an idiot. When another teacher was asking what was going on in the video u can hear the teacher in question saying this idiot she's a pathetic animal.

Go to the chair of governors with that. Not acceptable

How do you have a video?

What was the other teachers reaction?

All sounds very strange so far

Well then you need to present that evidence to the school head asap because that is against teacher standards (although I suspect this staff member is support staff and not a qualified teacher). Disgraceful.

I had told my daughter to record on her phone so I could hear for myself what was being said to her. Like I said she ain't no saint but I wanted to hear myself

Well that sounds appalling and yes I’d be going to SLT and if necessary governors.

There’s obviously a lot of backstory then, is it always the same teacher?

The school should have a complaints policy on their website, sit with your daughter and compile a detailed account of every time something like this has happened - Names, dates, exact words if possible, witnesses, etc. submit a complaint first thing Monday morning.

Thank you all for the advice her head of year has asked for the video but I said I will go in and he can listen to it for himself.

So she was asked to leave a classroom and go to "resolve" (presumably internal isolation).

In general students who have been asked to leave the classroom are not permitted to go back and get work because they usually use this as an opportunity to disrupt the class again.

Most internal isolation rooms are either staffed by support staff (so not teachers) or SLT (senior teachers).

Either way if you have it on video then share it with the school.

So you and your dd decided in advance that she would record staff on her phone. How did she know she would have a problem? Sounds rather suspicious to me.
Why was she in the room in the first place? Sounds like a lot of missing info here OP.

She has so broken the rules again by using her phone in the inclusion room.

So you and your dd decided in advance that she would record staff on her phone. How did she know she would have a problem? Sounds rather suspicious to me.

I can imagine this may be due to the child having ongoing problems with how this particular teacher treats her.

She was put in resolve for missing a lesson. The teacher had said to her this morning if I was your mum I'd be ashamed when my daughter text me that that is when I told her to record the conversation as I wanted to hear what was happening.

When she missed her lesson where was she?

As a teacher I know there is a huge amount of info missing. Frankly if my child was truanting class they would be in serous trouble at home but you obviously see things differently . ..

Minipie or its because this child behaves poorly at school and the parent spends most of their energy finding excuses rather than supporting the school.

I would be disciplining your daughter first and foremost. It sounds like she is in need of it for skipping class. Perhaps the teacher is in the wrong too, but it sounds like only part of the story is being told. Instead of focusing on what the teacher said, perhaps you should focus on your dd and what she did wrong. What can she improve?

My DD12 recently got called an ‘idiotic kindergartener’ by a supply teacher. I queried it with the school and they told me they probably wouldn’t have believed me except that 2 other kids’ parents had been in touch to complain. SLT decided they wouldn’t be inviting the teacher back. It was investigated and DD had done absolutely nothing wrong and had been caught in some crossfire somehow.

I fully appreciate that teachers have an unbelievably stressful time, but I don’t think calling kids idiots/idiotic is really ok in any situation.