We also got offers from both but ended up going a completely different route (Channing, in Highgate - so more central and single sex). In the end Forest pretty much ruled themselves out as despite offering her a place their SEND department were then super off-putting (emphasising how difficult it would be for DD, how noisy the dining hall is, how little space there is for lunchtime play - etc. etc. - obviously not what you get told on the tours, and I suspect basically not true except in as much as it's a very big and lively school - but we've learned in our SEND journey not to go where we aren't wanted - life is too short). It's a shame as DD really liked it, as did we, despite the size - it felt like there were all kinds of kids there and lots of opportunities to do different activities. It was a bit awkward when their Admissions team were then asking why we'd turned the place down... I wonder if they know the conversations their SEND team are having? I guess it just affects few enough children that its' not high on their priority list.
DD got an offer with an academic scholarship from St Margaret's who were much more helpful on the SEND front too - really lovely and detailed in talking about supports they put in for kids who need a bit of help socially or with sensory stuff. It was super-tempting not only financially but also because I got a really good impression of the school and a lot of the senior leadership - it had such a nice feel to it. And they were really impressive on the ways they can stretch the more academic kids and also support those who are finding things more tricky (DD might well have been in both camps in different subjects!) I also really loved the setting - but OH was a bit worried about the academics (they had a not so great GCSE year* which I think was really a blip as they didn't have a head for that year's intake when they were coming in at Y7 - and indeed I think the GCSEs are much better this year - but OH couldn't quite get over those results or Bushey being that bit further out of central London). There were a few other factors but I think those were the main two.
So far she is loving Channing - SEND department have been great but not really needed so far (but it's nice to know they are there and engaged/keen to help) and there are lots of activities DD has thrown herself into (maybe too many, but there's not too much homework for now so it's a good time to try different things out!) The girls seem lovely and she's having a good time, and she's getting to do lots of football and music which are two of her big passions.
I think the lesson to take away is that all these schools are really good (I also know people who are super happy with Forest, and in fact I think DD would have done very well there too - but we just couldn't bring ourselves to send her there without full confidence that they would support her if she did have a wobble along the way).
We are now starting the whole process again for DS who is in Y4, and Belmont/Mill Hill and St Margaret's are definitely both in the frame for him - but luckily we have a couple of years yet until we actually have to decide for him!
*By not so great I mean, still twice as good as the average state school, and really impressive value added scores - definitely worth talking to them about this - I think they really excel at bringing out kids' potential in subjects they've been struggling with! But I think their absolute results have also recovered this year, and when we spoke to them they were expecting that to continue in the future, based on the increasing CAT scores of their intakes over time.