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Secondary education

Connect with other parents whose children are starting secondary school on this forum.

11 year old can't remember any names of his new classmates.

9 replies

Readinstead · 07/09/2024 01:18

I have just googled the above and was surprised that this is a possible indicator of Autism, on one site, but was not specifically mentioned on, my admittedly brief scan of, the Autism Society website. I will obviously discuss this with my dd tomorrow but was just wondering if anyone else has experienced anything similar. A bit of background:
When my dgs was in reception it took him until the first half term to remember his classmates names. His birthday is in mid August so although this seemed a little odd no one was concerned. He passed his English Sats with a score of 102 (lower than his practice scores which had been consistantly around 105) but got greater depth for maths and his reading is also assessed at this level. His memory is otherwise very good. He has consistantly been described as a popular member of the class who has many friends, throughout his time at primary school
He started secondary school this week and apart from the children from his old school cannot remember the name of any other child in his class even the ones be sits next to. The seating plan in his form class is alphabetical by surname and he struggled to remember if he was seated by a boy or a girl and with regard to ethnicity (both his primary and secondary are ethnically diverse) he hadn't got a clue!
I'm not interrogating him, honest, but he comes to my home after school and we always chat in the car and he has been very bubbly and chatty the last three days, telling me about his day, his lessons and what he had for lunch. He knows his form tutor's name, but not any of the other teachers and was proud of the fact that he knows his way around the school already and hasn't got lost like some of his friends.
Sorry this has been so long.

OP posts:
BestZebbie · 07/09/2024 01:41

It is a possible indicator of autism if the reason for it is face-blindness - if he couldn't recognise anyone then he is unlikely to recall their names correctly (even if he possibly knows facts about each classmate as a dossier).
Being generally forgetful or 'bad at names' in general isn't really specific to autism. Neither is concentrating on his old friends and the lessons in the first week at a new school rather than prioritising mingling with strangers!

spanieleyes · 07/09/2024 04:17

My son lived in halls at university for a whole year with 5 others, he couldn't name a single one by the end of the year!
He's autistic

Starlight7080 · 07/09/2024 04:22

My dd is terrible for names unless they are the same as hers or her friends . Same goes for teachers. I think maybe given its the first week then he may have just been distracted or not paid attention to names yet

Babychewtoy · 07/09/2024 04:29

Maybe he has prosopagnosia (face blindness).

It can be associated with autism but not necessarily. Does he have any other social difficulties?

Wherefore · 07/09/2024 08:36

It could be used as part of an overall profile if a child pays little attention to other children. But I definitely wouldn't be basing it on a child who has just started secondary. He may have heard hundreds of new names in his first week, along with new rules, classes, buildings, teachers etc., combined with lots of new big emotions.
And if he has form class at the beginning of the day, quite a lot happens between then and the end of the school day!

PTSDBarbiegirl · 07/09/2024 08:44

Working memory issue. Look into executive functioning and auditory processing issues and how to build strategies. Consider speaking to school about extra processing time needed and try digital supports at home.

BriocheForBreakfast · 07/09/2024 08:44

It's only week one and he has moved to a much bigger school with lots more pupils, new rules, new layout where he has to find his way to different locations based on a much more busy timetable. Ask him again in a few weeks. I think one of the biggest fears of year 7s is getting lost. He's probably been concentrating hard on that and his new classes.

Jimmyspiano · 07/09/2024 11:13

My summer born eleven year old started secondary school this week. He has no clue about the names of his new class mates or many of his teachers. He does not have autism.

Starting secondary school is a huge change. They are managing, and getting used to so many new things. It sounds like your grandson is doing a brilliant job of settling in. He is cheerful, getting to all of his lessons and coping with all of the changes. My son has not eaten anything at school yet as he is too anxious. It is a huge win if he is eating at school with the others.

Well done to your lovely grandson. I hope he continues to enjoy secondary school.

Readinstead · 07/09/2024 12:44

Thank you all for taking the time to respond and raising very interesting points. @Jimmyspiano Thank you and I hope your son feels less anxious very soon.

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