St John’s Leatherhead - problems

[NewWave2024]

We have a DC at the school and are finding that there are problems at the school which we hadn’t expected.

I don’t want to say too much but wondered if any other parents on here feel that things are not sorted out properly between children and the school is too lenient? Bad behaviour seems to just pass by with little to no accountability and then the same children do the same things and nothing changes?

We have other children at other schools and have been amazed how different the school's approach to behaviour is, compared to what we’ve seen elsewhere.

There are a number of other threads on this, the phrase “mini Andrew Tates” was used rather frequently- although obviously it’s a minority

@CaptainOhMyCaptain can you link these threads please? Thank you

I don't know anything about the school, but if you, or your child, are unhappy can you move them?

I would like to know as well as we are thinking about this school for 2025 entry

No personal experience but it’s my understanding John’s has always had somewhat of an issue with sexism because it hasn’t managed to shrug of the fact it used to be all boys. There’s always been a sense (at least what I’ve heard from friends) that girls are often treated like they’re encroaching on male spaces. I think they managed the transition to fully co-ed fairly poorly, making it clear girls were there as a financial necessity rather than individuals who could contribute to the school as a whole.

@NewWave2024 Sorry to hear you DC is having issues. I have DC at St John's and have found the school very responsive. In the younger years I actually thought they were a bit too involved rather than letting the kids sort things out amongst themselves.
Do escalate things if you don't feel the issue is being dealt with.
As for sexism, in my DCs year any hint of it is challenged and stamped out by the students (both girls and boys) so it has never become anything. Unfortunately we haven't yet managed to get rid of all idiots in the world and a small minority of them pop up in many places.
The school is 50/50 girls and boys and the girls are as strong a voice in the school as the boys. There has been nothing of what @abignael mentions in our years there.
My DC has had some bumps along the way but I am very happy with the school and more importantly my DC absolutely loves it.
@swlondon25 pm me if you have any questions about the school, happy to help.

@2dayistheday unfortunately not our experience at all. We have found it very light touch in the lower years. Non-existent might be a better description. There appears to be an implicit bias towards bullies/rough kids getting off and not having to account for their behaviour.

And yes a lot of mysoginy too but unfortunately you’ll find that everywhere nowadays in all schools thanks to the likes of Andrew Tate.

It has always had a reputation for suiting 'robust' children. I've heard many stories of bullying.

@NewWave2024 I'm really sorry to hear that you don't feel the school is addressing the problems. Not sure how old your DC is but we found (as did friends at other schools) that these issues thankfully disappeared as they got older. Not helpful in the here and now I know if the issues are impacting your DC.
Can only suggest you keep escalating, Mr Tate seems very approachable and it feels like he is bringing in a shift change so now might be a good time to raise this type of thing.
Again not sure if it's an age thing but little to no misogyny, the odd stupid person but very much not supported by the rest of the year. Been great to see boys calling out other boys behaviour when not appropriate.

@3WildOnes not sure where you heard that. My DC is sensitive and quiet and many of their friends are definitely not what I'd describe as robust whatever that even really means. I don't know anyone at the school who would say it had a reputation for bullying. But not all schools work equally for everyone and our experiences and children are all different. I'm sorry for anyone having tough times at any school but as we only hear the bad stories it can skew the view of an entire school when it might be a very small number of students in one year.
Remember these are children who are often being held to account as if they are adults.

That’s good what I’ve heard isn’t true. I think the misogyny problem might just be unavoidable now unfortunately. I was only under this impression because one of DD’s friends left John’s because of issues with boys.

Hi OP @NewWave2024 , I wondered if you had an update on how things are going at St John's? It is one of our 11+ options, and this thread has made me a bit worried. I appreciate that everyone's experiences are different though. Thank you

As a coed school there will always be misogyny issues, even if really tiny and well managed by the school, its natural they raise their head from time to time. I had, from parent friends, of boys, heard st John's has had its issues, some of which haven't been dealt with well at all. But that was info from 2 years back in 2022. A lot can change since then in terms of management, so things could be on the up there and no one seems to be jumping on this thread with countless horror stories. I assume you have a daughter? Our DD is at a girls only, suits her well, choice absolutely nothing to do with 'boys being a problem', just logistics were easy and the school looked great. We havent regretted it at all, it's great for her confidence.

@Gymnogene I won’t say too much but I’m confident now you can safely put it on your list and send your child there.

Things have improved.

Feel free to message me if you want.

Thanks @NewWave2024 , that is reassuring to hear. It is our backup school, as we have others that are our preference. But until recently were quite comfortable that it was a good option, if out first choices didn't work out. I think I might try and go and see it again, if possible

Hi OP #NewEave2024, mind if I ask how it was solved? Might be best if I send a PM?

DS has already experienced bullying that took too long to sort out (it was sorted, but had to get really horrid) so I'm keen to avoid it again as the damage still shows. St J made their house system /
pastoral care sound really good, but what does it really mean when put to the test?

Oops ...would help if I could type .. waving to ...

@NewWave2024

@welshvalleystosurrey pls message and I will answer your Qs

@NewWave2024 why the secrecy. Is there some reason you won't elaborate on here?

It's loyalty to the school. I have no axe to grind. It's very outing to write further on it as it's quite specific. I have given an update above that is general and reassuring I hope.

I agree with the original post - a lot of problems at the school with bullying. So many different parents I'm hearing this from. The new Head is super strict and doesn't seem to take pastoral care/bullying issues seriously.

Can you share more?
Do you know what sort of bullying is going on and what years this is?

Can you share what year this is and the update on how it has been handled? I am thinking this school for my children.

Things are much better now. The school will try to help if you explain what is going on. Sometimes you need to go to the very top but from there, they will do their best. The head is responsive and a kind man. It's a good option and I would recommend the school.