Moving schools in Y9

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My DD is in Y9, hates her school and wants to leave. It's a strict, academic school and she finds it stressful. The school has linear tutoring and it has been tough for her to make friends as there are only a couple of other Y9 girls in her form who are besties, and stringent rules in and between classes, so there's no opportunity to socialise except for the short, staggered lunch break. She says she has no friends and she is lonely and the GCSE options are rubbish (they do have a narrow curriculum compared to other local schools.) She's becoming disaffected with her learning and I'm worried about her. I'm also worried that it's too late to move her and that most schools are choosing/ have chosen their options at this point in Y9. The school she's at is supposed to be the best in the area, but it is not working for her. I'm also worried she will have the same problems elsewhere and that I'll be moving her to a school with more behavioural issues and she'll be no better off. Has anyone been in a similar situation and moved their child? How did it go?

PS sorry for the long post and thank you.

Very difficult situation. There is no right answer and either decision is a gamble. I would be looking at other schools, personally, given she is unhappy and not learning where she is. Of course it could be an out of the frying pan into the fire situation, but maybe she doesn't have a lot to lose at this point. Good luck

Thanks, this is the problem, it is a gamble and I'm so worried about getting it wrong. Thank you.

Is there a particular school you have in mind with GCSE options she would prefer and/or a strong ethos in terms of pastoral care? And does that school have places? If so, it may be a good idea to at least go and speak to them.

When students start options subjects, friendships often change anyway, so it's not a bad time to start another school.

My DD moved at the end of Y9 and it has been absolutely right for her. She wasn't desperately unhappy in her old school but just had some excellent and mature reasons for moving.

I would listen to your DD and try to look round some options. Lists of pros and cons re moving etc. Good luck 🤞

Thank you both. Yes there's one I'm thinking of, but they're full at the moment. We'd be put in a good place on the wait list though as we live quite close to it. It does have a good record for pastoral care and is a 'traditional' comprehensive so is inclusive. It also has some quite lively behaviour issues and is huge with a massive 6th form - a contrast to DD's current small academy. It has a wider range of options too, which is also a problem for DD in her current school. Thanks for your thoughts. 🌻
@msmatcha did your DD find the other children were open to friendships? I'm a bit worried they'll all have their groups and DD is quite shy socially.

I must admit my DD moved to a private school so easier to find a place and also much more common for people to come and go. She had a tricky first term settling in but now is very happy and much more herself.

Thanks, I am pleased it worked out for her. I'll speak to her again tonight and look at the options for both schools.

Move her. My Yr9 is in a big mixed comp and they have a huge range of gcse options, yes they have mates but in Y10 they'll make new ones via their subject choices. Eg all the arty kids together doing art, the top scientists doing triple science, the vocational stream ones doing the best options for them.

According to my DD who is now 17, you can move in year 9 and find a friendship group.

Starting in year 10 at a new school is likely to be much more difficult.

Personally I think the behaviour issues are much less once they have started options. (If they did exist before).
Also life itself is messy and it's a good life skill to work out how to carve their own path. If your DD hates her school you actually have nothing to loose

@Dacadactyl I think this prob depends on the school and child. Ours mixes the DC for all lessons Yr7-9 so although both of mine have 2/3 good mates they have huge circles of mates too. And seem to know everyone else (10 forms per year)

@deeprealisation im intrigued how that works please? Is that sets with high achievers from year 7 mixed with low achievers from year 9, along with middling year 8s?

@Dacadactyl no I mean in years 7-9 the DC are mixed up for all lessons.
They have a form group but then all classes are mixed up: sets / streams / mixed ability depending on subject. Plus huge extra curricular programme so DC can find their tribe