To move or not

[Newuser75]

So I'm just after some thoughts.
Our son (year six) is in an all through independent school. Very academic school, moderately high pressured.
He is happy there and has some nice friends. He is doing well although not at the top of the class or anything.

He is academically very, very capable but does have some SEN. He has autism, adhd (mainly distraction), visual processing disorder and a few others. He is very distracted by visual stimulus and noise. He doesn't like crowds and a lot of noise distresses him. Has struggled with school refusal and anxiety over the years. There are over 20 children in each class. And about 150 kids in the year in secondary. Pastoral care not so great.

There is another local school, a much smaller school, approximately 12 kids in a class with I think three classes per year. Pastoral care (so I've heard from other parents) is meant to be excellent, they seem to do a lot of extra curricular subjects that really interest him that he couldn't do at his current school.

We think he would do better at the second school due to mainly the smaller classes, more family feel and better pastoral care, less pushy, pressurised environment but are reluctant to move him from a school he has been generally happy at and has a nice friendship group.

He is open to all options.
Thoughts would be welcome.

That's a good idea, thank you will do that!

I don't know who is behind as the response was via email. We applied to CAMHS ( long tests done by us and the school). CAMHS responded that they would put it on hold for 12 months because he doesn't have ASD symptoms and for ADHD he has only inattentive symptoms and it is not enough as for ADHD diagnosis he would also need to display hyperactivity. Exact quote:
In terms of ADHD, although there are some difficulties with fidgeting and inattention to certain topics at school, there is a lack of difficulties in other areas associated with ADHD (e.g., impulsivity).

And they also used the fact that he has good results as an excuse why they don't want to process it further at this point

Now we went to a paediatrician who diagnosed him with dyspraxia but also moderate characteristics of Asperger and attention deficit. I have just reapplied through school using the paediatrician document. Probably another 3-6 months will pass before I hear from them again 😫

@ILickedItSoItsMine that's interesting. My son has good results at school too. Academically he is at expected level or above for all subjects excluding writing (he has dysgraphia and dyspraxia so finds writing difficult but has recently been allowed to type which is helping). He has been given a diagnosis of ADHD. We went privately though not through camhs which may make a difference?

he has dysgraphia and dyspraxia so finds writing difficult but has recently been allowed to type which is helping

same here. Now he is a very good writer( meaning when he types of course). He had a delay in writing in y3 and y4 because of handwriting difficulties. I remedied it by sending him 2 x a week to tutoring with a brilliant A level pupil. She was half the price paid elsewhere and she is even better than a qualified teacher. He could not write a paragraph at the beginning and now in 45 min writes ( types) over 1 page of quality story with the before it plan

Yes, def private assessment can change a lot if anybody can afford it

Sorry, it looks like we hijacked your thread, OP. Apologies for it:)

Friends wise you should ask about transition days etc for the other smaller school and take phone numbers to meet people in the holidays to help him settle if he moved.
Other than that what are the benefits of his current school, given it's going to be different from year 7 anyway?
The smaller school sounds lovely- I don't get why small and personal isn't more widely recognised as the major asset I think it is!

How's the head? How's the senco? If they are not willing then sometimes you have to give up.

I'd go for school B.

Sen and a pressured school is no fun for anxious Sen children.

Would he get into school b as surely all the 11 plus rubbish has finished now. Are you in Surrey?

Hopefully you can have a taster day at school B unless he has amazing friends that he would be devastated to leave at school A I'd defo go school B

Thank you for everyone's thoughts.

The smaller school run meet ups for students joining in year seven and there are a couple of transition days.

The only benefits we can see to staying where he is is that he has a nice group of friends and is settled there.

He would definitely have a place at both schools. The smaller one is none selective and the one he is at currently he has already passed the entrance exam for.

The pressurised environment and the fact that we haven't found the pastoral care very good up to this point is a big reason not to stay put!