Private or state?

[Sambatime]

My DS has been offered a scholarship to a great private school. Grandparents offering to pay the rest of the fees. School has excellent teachers and facilities but we’d have to drive him there. It’s a 15-20 minute drive. The alternative is our local, excellent state school. The teaching will not match up to the private school but there is a bus. It’s a public bus so timings don’t quite match up with school times and it takes 40 minutes. Which would you go for?

@Sambatime Why do you think he would coast?

Can't comment on the public/private but mine go to a state school and the bus service was just stopped and so I do the drive your describing every day anyway. Bad weather/crash/get up late etc etc you might end up driving anyway.

I believe parents should give as much love and the best education education they can.
It’s such an individual decision OP, I would personally make the travel and time sacrifice if the grandparents and child were willing to do their bit!

Worth looking at range of GCSEs on offer between schools and if align with DC interest? Also, A levels choice. We noted schools have a different take and curriculum offer ie. music, drama, PE, modern language or classics.

I would consider

1. How would you pay if grandparents stopped or couldn't pay anymore?
2. Can you afford to pay for second ds?

What's your relationship with your parents like and do they have any tendency at all towards emotional manipulation or wanting to control other people's decisions then be very very cautious about going into an arrangement like this. Imagine being in a situation where you and DH really wanted to spend a Christmas with the other set of GPs/didn't want to go to a family event and you got a blackmailing vibe of "we are shelling out all this money on school fees, you owe us your obedience". Obviously many GPs are perfectly nice people and wouldn't do that.

This is a very good point.

Think about how you would feel
presenting the invoice to them too. If they are nice N people and you just have to forward an email to them and it’s taken care of, great.

But if you have to contact them to ask if it’s paid etc. Discuss DC’s progress. Show school reports.
And will they pay for DC2 too?

I’d be concerned they will throw it back in DC’s face if he decides to pursue eg arts instead of what they may consider a ‘better’ professional qualification.

And will the funds be set aside to cover all educational expenses if anything should happen to one or both of them?

That's a little unfair on the OP. Maybe the OP works full time and can't be available to do the school run?

OP - do you think you could manage the logistics of the private school journey every single term time day for x years? If not there is your answer.

Hands down state

He bikes to the bus stop and gets the private school bus? Or any any other route to school that doesn’t involve you driving every day……

Meanwhile, where is his bike? Chained to the bus stop?

Are you sure there’s no school coach? Most private schools do have a bus service as their catchment areas are so big.

I’d go private if it’s basically free. Assuming you prefer the school. We plan to go to state because I genuinely prefer the ethos of the local state secondary over our local privates (which are a bit hothousey and cliquey). And they also cost £25k a year round here, which is half my take home salary, and their results aren’t even any better than the state schools to justify it. But I wouldn’t have any moral objection to DS going if he liked the school and I wasn’t paying.

Private 100%, no contest.

Grandparents are giving us the money upfront and are generally lovely so I think that’s ok.

Even the bus stop is 4 miles away, quite far to bike.

Private, no question

private, no question.

Haha, I didn't read the first response!

Depends where they are likely to be happier ours go to a private which is 20 mins away. One parent deliver the other collects occasionally grandparents collect. Longer school hours mean deliver at 8am and collect earliest 4pm but often 5pm.

Would you still have the same concern if the scholarship had been 100%?

Private.

20 minutes is hardly a journey and the benefits seem clear.

I’m surprised this is even a question tbh

20 min journey is not that far and most private schools have their own transport anyway. The question should be which option is the better fit for your son really.

I would go for private but only if the grandparents will pay for the fees up to the end of school. You don't want a situation where they change their mind in a year or two.

100% private. It's not the quality of the teaching that's different, it's the facilities and opportunities that students get.

As above, ensure grandparents can commit to whole stay at school and could cover the potential addition of VAT to fees in event of a change of government.

We were in the same situation and had a grandparent give us the money upfront to cover balance of fees to the end of sixth form, avoiding any potential complications in future.

I've heard about this type of situation before with grandparents paying fees. Do consider that 5-7 years is a long time and just because this money can be (easily) afforded now, doesn't mean it always will be - and what would happen then?

Go state