Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Secondary education

Connect with other parents whose children are starting secondary school on this forum.

Original poster

Judd, Dartford, Beths or Chis & Sid?!?

70 replies

SecondaryConfussion · 18/10/2023 17:31

DS got his Bexley and Kent results - he got top 180 in Bexley and 418 in Kent. That makes him eligible for a guaranteed place in Bexley and also OOC places for Judd and Dartford.
Now we need to decide which one to choose! I know it's an amazing problem to have, and we're very happy for him, but I do need some help deciding.

We live between Orpington and Petts Wood, so all schools will be a bit of a journey. Beths and Dartford have coaches, but I'm not sure how this works when the children have after-school clubs? He was very impressed by both Judd and Dartford, and Judd seems to be a convenient journey by train. Also, Dartford is the only one which is IB - would that rule it out for you, or put it on top of the list? I'm really not sure if being IB makes a difference.

He would like a sporty school and all schools seems to tick that box. But then he's football mad and most of these schools seem to be rugby focused, so may not matter!

I really don't know how to make this choice - help!!

TIA :)

OP posts:
Tryingtodecideschool · 26/10/2023 09:24

SecondaryConfussion · 26/10/2023 09:10

@newmum1976 how do you know there are 135 boys with a higher OOC score than your son?
My DS scored 420, which is viewed as a sure shot for Judd or Dartford, but I also know that there are many high scorers this year - just don't know how many.

Under "what your score means"

www.kent.gov.uk/education-and-children/schools/school-places/kent-test#tab-5

You can download a scores test report for Kent 2023.

AnneElliott · 26/10/2023 09:26

Beth's has a terrible reputation and when I visited with DS I could see why. I'd avoid that one.

I know people with kids at Dartford and Chis and Sid and they seem happy and are doing well.

historyrepeatz · 26/10/2023 10:04

DS had a good feeling when he visited Beth's and is veering towards that. We live close to all three Bexley Grammar choices and only a few minutes walk from Chis n Sid but he didn't like the feeling at all.

I've lived in the borough all my life and went to Chis n Sid many moons ago and have friends who went to BGS and have kids there now. I hear so much about BGS (all good) and Chis n Sid (mixed). I have never heard anything either good or bad about Beth's. Are the posters who said Beth's has a bad reputation able to provide any more information?

newmum1976 · 26/10/2023 10:35

SecondaryConfussion · 26/10/2023 09:10

@newmum1976 how do you know there are 135 boys with a higher OOC score than your son?
My DS scored 420, which is viewed as a sure shot for Judd or Dartford, but I also know that there are many high scorers this year - just don't know how many.

420 is top 50 in test OOC

Tryingtodecideschool · 26/10/2023 10:36

It's interesting that boys seem to have scored 420+ than girls especially in the state sector.

DollyDaisyDo · 26/10/2023 10:43

AnneElliott · 26/10/2023 09:26

Beth's has a terrible reputation and when I visited with DS I could see why. I'd avoid that one.

I know people with kids at Dartford and Chis and Sid and they seem happy and are doing well.

Genuinely interested in what dort of a bad reputation Beths has please?

Original poster
SecondaryConfussion · 26/10/2023 11:32

@newmum1976 Thanks for looking that up and also the link 👍

OP posts:
JustMeJustMe · 26/10/2023 12:30

I think this is why it's so important to be led by your child. We have had nothing but a good experience with Beths so far, and haven't heard a bad word. Some of the posts above are critical of C&S but this post is the reverse. Basically we will all hear good and bad about all of the schools - but in reality what you will hear will only be the experience of the tiny percentage of people you come into contact with so it's bound to be skewed. You can't predict the experience your child will have - it's going to be affected by so many variables, including their personality and that of the people around them. You can't predict that!

groveparker0 · 26/10/2023 12:31

AnneElliott · 26/10/2023 09:26

Beth's has a terrible reputation and when I visited with DS I could see why. I'd avoid that one.

I know people with kids at Dartford and Chis and Sid and they seem happy and are doing well.

Interested to know what you've heard.

JustMeJustMe · 26/10/2023 12:35

groveparker0 · 26/10/2023 12:31

Interested to know what you've heard.

Show quote history

Me too. We've not had any issues, it's been an amazing school so far.

AnneElliott · 26/10/2023 15:42

On thé Beth's point, the kids were so rude when we went round and looked it really put me off. Considering the schools normally put the best of the bunch on show I was really concerned at how awful the others were when the ones that were there in the night were rude.

And from what I hear from other people it's a tough school with lots of fights/ bullying.

Turmerictolly · 26/10/2023 16:14

Unfortunately we also know two children who were bullied at Beth's and one left in Yr 9 for another school and has been much happier. I didn't like it and neither did ds, it just felt a bit rough but ds was a very quiet and timid boy and maybe I was being over protective. We liked all of the other grammars more so it didn't make our shortlist. They do football though.

groveparker0 · 26/10/2023 16:32

That's very much at odds with our experience. My son was bullied - or targeted is more the right phrase I think - and it has always been dealt with very swiftly and satisfactorily.

Of course every child will have a different experience of school and I will say from my own fairly limited POV that Beths seems quite different from the other grammars. I like that but others might not.

DollyDaisyDo · 26/10/2023 17:16

Both my boys went to Beth's and both loved and flourished there. It is very much a 'boys' school but we found it deals with any issues around bullying and physicality very well and negative behaviour is not tolerated.

It is very diverse, possibly over 50% of the boys are black and this is definitely not the case at the other local grammar schools. Some people do struggle with this and we certainly had other parents ask us how we felt about this (we are white for context).

I am NOT saying this is the case with anyone commenting here.

Snowfreezer · 27/10/2023 13:48

Congratulations to the posters with all these options. Can I ask how much preparation you did to secure such a great result? Did your child start working in year 4? Did they go to good or outstanding primary schools? How did your family juggle 11 plus and working or did you pay for a tutor?

I know some good friends whose son could have gone anywhere, not sure if this was because of too 180 or area, but they chose Beths. I think they got a later offer for Dartford but stayed at Beths. They are very unhappy with the phone use policy at Beths.

Phone use is an issue with teenagers but it has too big of a role in their child's life that all started with Beths and their child has a real issue now.

They warned me off any school with an open phone or device policy.

I know they are not the only person unhappy with that aspect of Beths as it has also been raised by their friends who also have children at Beths at social gatherings.

Apart from phone use there has been some griping about some staffing in the early years but this was more to do with staff shortages.

The school have their view and will not be changing it re phone policy.

You should also remember that families feel so happy to get a place at the grammars that they try be very positive about the schools so do not wish to rock the boat.

I asked another friend, Chis and Sid do not have phones displaced openly it is a phones must be turned off policy. Only sixth formers can use them in communal areas or a large lecture theatre that they use.

Devices can cause trouble everywhere, parents are concerned about the new device use in Townley. I would also avoid private schools that expect children to bring devices into lessons.

It is hard as they are all good schools, results wise and no school is perfect.

DollyDaisyDo · 27/10/2023 14:48

I'm pretty sure all teenagers are glued to their phones and I'm not sure how you can blame a school for that!

Snowfreezer · 27/10/2023 15:00

I am not blaming the school at all.

I can only go on the experience of friends, friends who I can trust. They would not have chosen a school with a liberal phone policy if they had had their time again. They thought they could manage that at home. They can not do so.

The issue is (I believe) that even if they take away the devices the excuse is they are needed for school work and so on. Now that may be a teenager just ensuring he gets what he wants too.

Their view is this all started with needing a phone for school reasons. I challenged them and said well do not give your child the phone, they assured me you need it for school anyhow.

Just because everyone has phones, it does not mean that the adverse impact for some children should be ignored.

For my family we are going to try very hard to negate the influence of phones and devices. Too much time-wasting and harmful content for me.

Bluejellybean23 · 27/10/2023 15:01

Dartford has an excellent reputation and the IB is a positive in my opinion (although maybe I'm just biased as I did it!)

JustMeJustMe · 27/10/2023 18:49

So I honestly think that it's probably again a really personal/individual thing that links back to parenting style. I considered the phone policy at Beths before he started and it actually fits with my overall philosophy on use of mobile devices. My approach has always been that this is the world they live in, we can't change it - as adults they will need to moderate their usage of devices - no one is going to be there to do that for them. So my son has had a smartphone from the start of Y6. He had to listen to me for an hour while I lectured him on my expectations around behaviour/safety and repeat it all back before I handed it over! I've then trusted him to moderate his own usage and behaviour BUT I do regular unannounced spot checks and he is never allowed it overnight. If when I do a spot check I see anything that I think needs a chat, we sit down and I coach and advise him. So far he's been doing okay, I've actually seen some great examples of him calling out poor behaviour, and I see it as a way for me to teach him skills that will hopefully set him up for life. I'm alive to the fact he might make a mistake at some point, but that can happen to anyone at any time. I'm very much of the approach of trust/empowerment/coaching but that's not for everyone. The Beths mobile policy is of that style too - the students themselves have written the rules for it - very much as 'we have been trusted therefore we must be responsible and this is how'. That really chimed with me because that was already the approach I'd taken at home. But I totally get why that would be uncomfortable for someone who had a different philosophy, and I totally respect we are all different. So basically it's what I've said before - this is SO individual to you and your child! Take a look around, read the literature and go with what you think will work best for your family.

Turmerictolly · 27/10/2023 19:00

@Snowfreezer, ds had tutoring from year 5. Achieved Top 180 so had the pick of the Bexley Grammars plus also had scores for Dartford and Olaves.

Tryingtodecideschool · 27/10/2023 19:15

Snowfreezer · 27/10/2023 13:48

Congratulations to the posters with all these options. Can I ask how much preparation you did to secure such a great result? Did your child start working in year 4? Did they go to good or outstanding primary schools? How did your family juggle 11 plus and working or did you pay for a tutor?

I know some good friends whose son could have gone anywhere, not sure if this was because of too 180 or area, but they chose Beths. I think they got a later offer for Dartford but stayed at Beths. They are very unhappy with the phone use policy at Beths.

Phone use is an issue with teenagers but it has too big of a role in their child's life that all started with Beths and their child has a real issue now.

They warned me off any school with an open phone or device policy.

I know they are not the only person unhappy with that aspect of Beths as it has also been raised by their friends who also have children at Beths at social gatherings.

Apart from phone use there has been some griping about some staffing in the early years but this was more to do with staff shortages.

The school have their view and will not be changing it re phone policy.

You should also remember that families feel so happy to get a place at the grammars that they try be very positive about the schools so do not wish to rock the boat.

I asked another friend, Chis and Sid do not have phones displaced openly it is a phones must be turned off policy. Only sixth formers can use them in communal areas or a large lecture theatre that they use.

Devices can cause trouble everywhere, parents are concerned about the new device use in Townley. I would also avoid private schools that expect children to bring devices into lessons.

It is hard as they are all good schools, results wise and no school is perfect.

Achieved super selective scores in the Kent test. Started tutoring in October of Y5 but he's always been a big reader and loved maths.

Snowfreezer · 27/10/2023 21:22

Some incredible results on here.
Very well done to your children. A year of tutoring seems a good investment.
I hope I did not derail thread with my phone and device rant.

JustMeJustMe · 27/10/2023 21:42

We did some tutoring in Y5 but actually stopped it because it wasn't working out. The tutor was having a negative impact on his confidence, so we took it all in house and just did practice papers and revision books ourselves at home. Mostly in the summer holidays before the tests. I did the 11+ and went to a grammar in the 90s, so had a bit of a memory of it, and we'd been through it with his sister a few years before, so had an idea of what to focus on.

emmagow13 · 29/10/2023 13:14

Have a child in Bexley GS and one just left Beths. Wouldn't choose BGS again if had to make the choice again. Child happy there and doing v well but their woke spin on anything and everything makes being a teenager so much more difficult imo and they don't follow up on pastoral issues flagged up. Beths was great pastorally and for picking up on gifted kids in different areas. Son really enjoyed his time there and did well. Beths much more welcoming feel, imo. Found in areas where child is not great (but still keen and enjoys) at BGS e.g. sports that they are left to entertain selves and nothing taught to them and nothing done to encourage them during lesson times after being set from yr 7.