Tell me about your child thriving at (comprehensive) school

[Flockameanie]

DC is in yr6. Our local comp is absolutely fine. New SLT last year that have good aspirations. Decent curriculum. But, like all state schools it suffers from a lack of resources and large class sizes. It's run down and has very limited facilities. We've been on two tours, and both times the kids looked pretty bored and the atmosphere in the classrooms was quite 'flat'. But, it's where the majority of local kids go, DC can get there under their own steam, will have local friends, go up with friends from primary, etc.

Have your kids thrived in a similarly not terrible, but not terribly inspiring school? I'm worried they're going to be bored and unmotivated :(

Thanks for all these replies. Like some PPs I'm not really that worried about exam results. I just want them to love learning/ be enthused and inspired to do the best they possibly can and to develop self-confidence and a strong sense of who they are/ want to be. Oh, and intellectual curiosity. But I think that is pretty much beaten out of most kids by the national curriculum/ GCSEs.

The school gets mixed feedback from local parents. Some love it. Some have pulled their kids out (but that was under the previous SLT). I think like many/ all schools, it works for some kids but not for others.

@TheTurn0fTheScrew that's amazing - well done your DD! Your experience sounds exactly what I'm hoping for, I guess... In that was clearly supported and motivated to achieve her potential

My 2 dds are thriving in a local comp. They are both doing really well academically, are joining in with loads of extra curricular activities the school offers, and are generally enjoying school.
With over 1000 students there, there’s always kids they get on with, and teachers are generally happy to support students who are willing to learn.
This is a ‘good’ (ofsted) comp in a mixed area in a northern city - nothing special as such, but it seems to work for my dcs

You should want more than fine.

It doesn’t sound at all ideal, so if can afford to go private until 6th form I would.

But if it’s going to make life a misery or worry you to death then go with the comp and make sure they have tutors when needed and extras and summer language exchanges and all that. However, it might really not work out, so devise an emergency really have to try and afford it plan too.

@Stealthtax I don’t have much faith in the system either. Mostly because the govt had done all it can to fuck it up and provide as uninspiring a curriculum as possible. I do have faith in the individuals who work in schools though and I’m sure most teachers are doing the best they can in difficult circumstances.

Really sorry to hear about the racism your DC have encountered. Terrible that it’s come from the teachers too.

Well im not so impressed so far. Dd in y7 at local school.
Put in wrong set. And they know it but still stuck there 4 weeks later. An admin error i assume so could be primary or the secondary.
Shes being set homework which is ks2 level despite exceeding on sats.

Shes also had a much older boy try to knock her shoe off.
Her friend in another school is stuck in top set and really anxious doesnt understand and they wont move her.

The other thing is yes, we’d all like our kids to go somewhere better than fine/decent/just about acceptable. But, under the gloss of good facilities, how good actually are your private alternatives?

We’ve never had the money for private so it’s a moot point for us. But that being said, our local independent is IMO not worth the money. It does get better results than the comp, but it’s selective so it should, and the results aren’t stellar. The extra-curricular activities are definitely better, but taking music as an example, the strongest kids at independent schools are still attending the music centre and junior conservatoire that my DC attend, so ultimately you reach a level with many where parents are still buying in extras.

There are clearly some fabulous independent schools out there, and a couple of DC2’s friends travel a long distance across the city to go a really high achieving one that looks like amazing. Maybe you do have a really great independent option, but I worry that it’s easy to assume private always = better without the evidence to support that on an individual school level.

Local bog standard comp to us has a permanent police presence. Kids are scanned for knives and there are random phone content checks. Girls either wear trousers or shorts under their skirts. This is compulsory.

Private school my girls went to have a resident tennis coach.

I guess that’s my point @TheTurn0fTheScrew. I’m not assuming private is better and that’s why I’m looking for 1st hand accounts from people whose kids have thrived at average local comps. I’m not talking about awful schools with knife and gang problems. Our local is in a nice area, no police presence or anything like that.

I just want my kids to be inspired to reach their potential, whatever that potential is, and to feel motivated to do their best at school.

All mine went to the local comp. Our original preference was for state but we did due diligence on the other options.

Grammars in the neighbouring borough - concern was the long journey, the intense focus on academic results at the cost of a broader education, the "hot house" atmosphere (little to offer the child who had peaked at 11). They were overwhelmingly white, affluent MC whose parents wanted private without paying for it.
Local private schools - fabulous facilities, their own theatres and golf courses but broadly a narrow social subset and we had concerns about poor experiences of racism reported (from observation this is an issue across all school types, you can't buy your way out of it) and the very narrow social demographic.
Local comp was a true local comp - it took all social and financial demographics, was walking distance from the house and did well by both the top ability kids and the lower. It was larger than I original wanted but had a very good pastoral structure so felt smaller whilst benefiting from the economies of scale. It also mad a much more diverse staff and intake and a supportive cohort of parents from all parts of that intake - parents can make a huge difference if they support a school.

All four went to the local comp, all went to top end universities and are established in good professional roles across public and blue chip private sectors. They have friends from a wide range of backgrounds from their school days and the "local" factor meant they had time to build local friendships and engage in more after school activities. They were also happy at school for the most part.

We were able to provide the "cultural capital" and activities which the school budget didn't run to. I would expect under current budgets we would need to do more of that. I'm glad we resisted the pressure to go selective/private.

The one factor which might have pushed us down the private path would have been unmet special needs where LA budgets did not adequately support a child in mainstream.

@Flockameanie don't underestimate the impact of a strong and aspirational HT and SLT – our local Secondary Modern went from somewhere parents wanted to avoid at all costs to being over-subscribed, thanks to a new HT.

Research has repeatedly shown great teaching to be the most important element in a child's educational achievement (and no, I'm not a teacher!). Closely followed by a supportive home environment, and a friendship group who share the same ambitions. Class size is a much less significant factor than we as parents commonly assume eg children do better in a large class with a great teacher than in a small class with a mediocre teacher.

My DS is at a local outstanding state school. Still have parents pulling kids out and moaning about it.
Are you sure they don't set maths on yr10?
Also do they do triple science and double? Opt for triple as only the dedicated students will want to do it so it self sets.
From experience you get what you put in. If you do well/try the teachers help you more.
My DS noted that all the ones who put in effort did well at GCSEs and those who didn't were the ones upset on results day that they should have done better.
Also he doesn't have to travel all over the area for his social life. By default they all live within a mile of the school.

My 3 all went to the local comp and have thrived. There were some friendship issues along the way but academically great results. However I agree with pp that's partly due to them having parents interested in their education, who support school decisions and respect teachers etc. Plus valued a love of learning outside of school with plenty of reading, talk of news and a few sporting hobbies.

Thanks @C8H10N4O2 @thing47 @sm40 and @heartdog for your really helpful replies. Yes, we're definitely able to provide the 'cultural capital' outside school (and already do).

The thing about friendship groups with similar ambitions really struck home. I had that at school and it's what made me up my game and aim far higher than I ever would have if I hadn't been surrounded by similarly swotty culture-loving friends. I guess my fear with the comp is the 'lowest common denominator' factor. The stories of teachers responding to enthusiastic kids is encouraging, I just hope that such kids feel it's ok to show their enthusiasm. That, I think, is my biggest concern - disengaged kids breeding a low-aspiration atmosphere. I accept that this concern may be unfounded!

I also strongly believe in the importance of a local social life/ friendship group. Really interesting to hear that there's research showing that class size isn't a significant factor @thing47.

@sm40 They may set maths in yr10. It's opaque on their website (I will email and ask). All teaching in KS3 is definitely mixed attainment classes (with, I think, a separate 'nurture' group for children who need it). They offer triple science. Overall the curriculum offering is pretty good - better than a lot of state schools.

DS went to local (but outstanding but v run down physically) comp and just dropped off at uni (Nottingham). DD at same comp and got 6 9s and 4 8s at GCSEs this summer. Younger DS started there in covid and didn't settle as all his friends went to nearer linked to primary secondary. He moved in year 7 - this school is 'good' but has amazing facilities and is brand new. If he passes enough GCSEs to be able to go to sixth form I'd be delighted.

point is kids can do well even at 'normal' comps and all kids are different. I think best thing is for kids to be happy at school - if they're not then you're facing an uphill struggle. And what makes kids happy/soar differs - for older DD and DS it was being able to study what they liked and good/nice teachers. For youngest it's being with his friends

DC1 is in Year 8 in a local comp. It's rated good and have better than average exam results. It's a bit run down like all state schools. But DC1 is enjoying her time at school. She's not bored or unmotivated. She's got activities after school, all outside of school.

Although I have been quite negative about my DCs experience at a comp, I will say that the teachers really latch on to bright enthusiastic kids and give them lots of encouragement. Probably more so than at a school where every pupil is middle-class, bright and bushy-tailed!

My dc are at the local comprehensive school. When dc1 started in 2017 it was Ofsted rated requires improvement and the school wasn't great although dc1 thrived there. Then they got a new head about a year later who really turned things around. Ofsted recently rated it good and dc2 and dc3 are doing very well there. All the staff are very enthusiastic with my younger dc when they come to watch school concerts etc and when my dc1 came in to visit, all the staff were really pleased to see him.

My kids, in a similar way to me actually, survived secondary school with average results.

We thrived - all of us - at sixth form college. That's where we started to really achieve and our careers started.

Mine are thriving in average comp. Great

Great teachers, nice friends, on target for top grades at GCSE. All at an average comp. Maybe it's their parenting haha.

My kids have done well at their comp. We are in Wales so no other option anyway really! They walk to school, have local friends, have great relationships with their teachers.

Sounds like it’s a good school that leads to a great sixth form, save the cash private school would cost and put it towards uni fees/a house deposit. And have some lovely family holidays.

I wasn’t impressed at all with our local comp and didn’t have money for private, however was able to pay the bus fees for my DS to attend the better comp a few miles away. It’s a school only bus so I feel confident putting him on it and yes he is thriving there, really happy. Great teaching and tons of extra curricular stuff to choose from.

Our DC's is an academy (small chain of 3 local secondary schools) and it's excellent. He is absolutely thriving. We would have gone private had it not worked out, but he's really flying.