I know 3 of the schools you mention: T , W and D. Agree with everyone that T sounds better fit for your son.
yes, the range of sport at T is not as all-encompassing as at W but they do the same core sports and the quality is still very high. W music dept is a bit ‘other’ to the rest of the school, imo. The music dept at T is in a league of its own.
There is a persistent rumour that T is highly academic - not so; and stronger than W academically - may have been the case a few years ago but no longer since W’s new head tightened up their admissions. Now they are about the same. W is stricter, higher standards of behaviour, manners.
I would ignore the IB question as although it is an option at W you can also choose to sit A-levels and if you don’t already have a strong preference it’s too early for this to be a factor at this point.
D is between the two in terms of music and sport, and is a bit stronger academically. As is Alleyn’s where standard of music is so high it has become inaccessible to many children, although they have just got an inspirational new head of music who will sort that out.
A is co-ed, D and W boys only, T has girls in the 6th form so a different atmosphere which permeates down the whole school. If D and W would get with the programme and do the same they would be more appealing.
Something else to really consider is location and therefore commute time and stress for your son, and also for you taking him to Saturday sports, attending events at the school. The easier this is for you all, the less tired your son will be and the more invested you will all be, and get a lot more out of the school. We looked at St Dunstan’s and Epsom, but quickly decided too far away. There is also St Paul’s, Emanuel, Caterham. And don’t rule out good state school options, if you have them.