Has anyone had a DC go into year 7 knowing no one else?

[listsandbudgets]

This will happen to DS. It's obviously not what we wanted but it's how it's ended up. At least he has a school place.

He's really nervous about it as presumably lots of them will know each other from primary school.

Reassuring stories please and also any hints and ideas to help especially as he was bullied in primaryt. I've told him he'll make friends quickly enough but he's not convinced.

Yes, our son was the only one from his primary in his form at secondary, it was fine,no problems.

Not DC but 23 years ago I went into year 7, a few people from my previous year but none from my class and certainly not friends (more like enemies!). I’m married and have two kids and just met up with 5 friends, all from high school, one from my form.

Induction day? Some schools use a game where they introduce themselves, and/or have a team of 3 or 6 for a task. This helps. Then then take each others phone number at lunch break, tell him to encourage this. Phone HoY now and ask what they do to help, facilitate.

Yes my DS1 did this. The first few days were difficult but he very soon made friends. He's now 23 and has just booked a lads holiday with some of the boys he met in that year 7 class!

Yes, my DD did it and it was absolutely no problem. She made friends quickly from the first day and now surrounded by a lovely group of girls.

Thank you so much all of you I'm now feeling much less worried for him.

unfortunately there is no induction until July but hopefully he'll find someone he wants to meet up with in the summer, you never know.

My dd started on a random Monday in year seven. We'd just moved back from Australia, she had a dodgy Australian accent and she's black in an extraordinarily white area, close to BNP headquarters no less.

She knew nobody at all.
Her lessons that day were
French (never done it)
History (only done Australian history)
RE (never done it)
And geography where she had to label a map of the UK.

We arrived and I took her to the office - oh, she's also anaphylactic so I had a meeting with someone about that.....and a girl came down to get dd. Girl had a handbag on the crook of her arm and looked 17. Dd not sophisticated. Off they went and I had a day imaging her head being flushed down the toilets Grange Hill style.

I went to pick her up and I honestly nearly threw up in the carpark waiting.

She got to the car, opened the door and said 'is it OK if I stay and play netball, it's an hour, see you' and she was gone.

My dd will start secondary being the only one from her school going there. However, I already made an effort to find other dc going via there as well because my dd does a lot of sport and other activities. I think it helps if you manage to find out some dc going. But if not, there will be others in your ds same shoes not knowing anyone. Even if you know people you might not have them in the same class so will need to make new friends anyway.

My older two both started without knowing anyone (although in both cases a child -siblings- from their nursery was there) and DD2 now in year 7 knew one girl from dancing.

Honestly, it will be fine.

When I dropped DD1 off for the transition day I told the art teacher she knew no-one and he called a group of girls from a different local primary over to take her with them.

And DD2 was separated from the one girl she did know on the transition day

DD was in that position 5 years ago. She made a best friend by lunchtime on day one, and by the end of week one had 12 good friends. Any time she saw someone else on their own she (and her growing friendship group) asked if they wanted to sit with them until their friends arrived. Some (most!) of the 12 are still good friends, including some who have since moved away. She now has 4 or 5 friendship groups and is literally never alone!
DS, on the other hand, moved to a school with several classmates. Within a month it became clear none of them were actually friends and he had a much more rocky start as a result! 6 years on, he too has found his people and he has a large friendship group both in and out of school.
My next DS is starting a different secondary in September, also alone, and I’m not worried at all.

Yes. She spent a long time moaning about it but by the end of y8 she wouldn't have moved even if she had the chance to. It can take a while.

It's fairly normal. There were around 25 girls from DD's primary going to the same 8 form secondary, only 2 made it into her form and both were girls DD didn't like at all.

We encouraged her to talk to other girls on induction day, she took small paper slips with her mobile number with her and she kept in contact with some over the summer holiday.

She is in Y11 now and while friendships changed since Y7 there are still 2-3 girls from the beginning she hangs out with a lot.

She hardly speaks to old primary school girls at all.

Yes, best thing that ever happened to my DD. didn't have many friends in primary then didn't get into the same secondary. I was so worried but she has the loveliest group of friends now. First friend was another girl who was in same circumstances and they stuck together and attracted others.

My ds didn't know anyone.... He made a friend on induction day and they were firm friends until they left and moved away 😔 but by then he had joined clubs he was interested in and had made more friends.

My DD will only know 1 other.... She is at a 16 place primary and they're going off to 6 different schools in September so most aren't going with a close friend.

Yes, it is very common, a good school has methods to deal with this.

Sometimes moving up with people from primary is a negative. A clean slate and an open mind are good sometimes. Also it goves them confidence for later when they are choosing sixth form, uni, jobs as they always know they have done it.