GCSE pressure and end of secondary school mixed emotions

[TeddybearBaby]

Hi,

I wonder if any of you can relate. I’m writing down my feelings to try and make a bit of sense of them tbh and hear from others in the same boat.

My DS is doing his GCSE’s in just over a week 😱. I feel like they have really creeped up on me and that they have been being talked about since forever at the same time.

I have been so wrapped up in the organising / trying to get him to revise that it’s only just hit me that this is it for him and secondary school and I feel quite emotional about it. It’s ridiculous that this is just dawning on me. Today he had his last geography lesson with the teacher he has had since year 7 and I felt so overwhelmed by it, I was shocked.

I go between being so proud of him and the young man he is becoming, polite and kind etc that I feel like I shouldn’t put any pressure on him to revise and should let him make his own way then I’m hit with a wave of anxiety that he NEEDS to revise more.

Sorry for the rambling post. I’m hoping some of you can relate. Thanks for reading.

What are his plans for September?

DD will stay either at her school for 6th form or move to a neighbouring one, she has conditional offers for both but is very undecided. She is revising well but we have lots of days where she is breaking down at 9pm thinking she didn't do enough.

She is /We are also just starting an assessment journey for ASD/ADHD and processing dyslexia so this is all on top of the revision and exam stress.

I am actually taking parental leave for 4 weeks and DH is covering the last week of her schedule. The stress of work for me and constant looking out for DD is taking its toll. The last mocks ended in me being ill with stress migraines. I can now take care of her without wondering if I missed a deadline at work or how to sort out a system issue or covering a colleague.

Our school is not doing a lot for the Y11s after the exams, they have a tea party end of June but that's it.

He is planning to change schools and go to a new sixth form to do A levels in September. He has a conditional offer for that. If he did well enough he could stay on at his current school but it isn’t his first choice anyway so I think he would move on anyway but it is always nice to have options.

I think the lack of plans for the end of school life doesn’t help. I don’t think anything is planned at all. The students asked for a prom but the head said no.

Sounds very stressful for you! I’m glad you have something in place now to make it all a bit easier 🤞🏼.

I hope your daughter does well and good luck with the diagnosis’s!

Results days will be an interesting 😬

Not looking forward to results day. DD will definitely won't wear uniform anymore, both schools adopted business dress for 6th form and it will mean lots of shops and a frustrated DD. She actually has a great figure to dress for but it's the deciding what to match with what instead of just wearing the same things as anyone else will be a challenge for her.

I took results day off and we will do something to celebrate surviving it.

Our school only does prom at Y13 but I know from DD that several of her wider circle will leave the school, either to go to a different 6th form, apprenticeship or college. Not sure that eating cake with the teachers and head is a great way to say goodbye.

This business dress is a bit of a throwback. My friend works in the City and wears smart black jeans and a smart plain top. When she started 30 years ago it was all suits/jackets/skirts. Now she only dresses a bit smarter if she knows she is meeting with a Government Minister that day.

A few schools near us do business dress for sixth form. Luckily ours doesn’t - just a few rules like no tracksuit bottoms and jeans cannot be ripped. My DD is counting down to be able to have all
piercings out and on display!

Worth mentioning too that DD may also choose to do an A level programme at a local college.

Don't forget to film stuff, we did the last walk to school that Ds1 and Ds2 did together, so just them leaving the house together and walking down the drive. Also when exams have gone well, recorded their jubilation at the questions they answered and felt got right (this is for later when they inevitably feel that they messed it all up, doom and gloom phase between exams and results day)

It is huge them leaving secondary especially the end of their uniform wearing. Mine took their clean uniform into school , school jumpers, sports kit etc on the last day to hand over to teachers on the gate, wore their tie for 2 hours then removed it and handed it in to reception along with everyone else. Came home in just a shirt and trousers. Felt very strange. So take photos of them in their full school uniform as you no doubt have first day photos so get some last week photos too.

As parents we were asked to provide first day year 7 photos for the leavers' assembly, loads of parents did it apparently, all the kids thought it was a hoot.

Thank you for those tips, I wouldn’t have thought about doing those things but definitely will now. The assembly sounds lovely, wish they were doing something at DS school.

I agree with the business dress, I am a city banker and wear dark jeans and tops unless I am meeting a customer or we had HQ visitors.

Good idea about the photo, we did a Y11 one on the first day back in school.
They do a yearbook and hoody and DD asks for both.

She warned us that she would cut up her skirt but I asked her not to as they are in great condition and I want to pass them on. I allowed the oldest jumper and any shirt. She will take a clean one or her PE top, which had to be embroided with her name, with her for signing.

Business casual for sixth form. I prefer it to some schools where kids wearing cropped top and body piercings on show or some kids look like they taking pyjamas style to the max.
Zara has good selection of basics and Primark. Just go for neutral colours.

Definitely do something to mark the occasion. The ideal time would be after exams but before results. Even if it's mainly for you, it's a big milestone and you matter too.