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Secondary education

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Original poster

Drugs at Private Schools

277 replies

abignael · 05/04/2023 20:42

I have a DD in Sixth Form at a Surrey private school (day school) and I was recently looking at schools for my DS for the 11+ next year. I asked for her opinion on schools in the local area and was shocked that most her responses included references to the pupils there being “druggies.” I was particularly appalled when she told me that pupils at a school where I know a housemistress frequently smuggle in Ketamine and take it in their dorms. Apparently this is not uncommon at private schools - particularly boarding ones according to her. I won’t name the schools as I feel dragging their names through the mud at the behest of a teenage girl is inappropriate but could anyone enlighten me on this?

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Changeau · 06/04/2023 12:16

LexMitior · 06/04/2023 12:10

Ask yourself why such schools do not have drug testing if it is a real concern.

The answer is that they would lose a lot of their pupils. Schools are the same everywhere - private schools may have more expensive drugs but they have them and they are used.

Omg.

Honestly, listen to yourselves.

I just asked dd and, as predicted, she laughed and said no way, that would be a totally weirdo thing to do. She would have no problem telling me if drugs had been found in the school. Drug taking at school would in no way be seen as cool, it would be sad. It's an academic girls school, no idea if mixed schools or boys schools would be different

If kids from private boarding schools take drugs out of school in the holidays that's on them.

MrsBennetsPoorNerves · 06/04/2023 12:17

My privately educated friends were definitely more exposed to drugs than I was at my state comprehensive. Especially those who were at boarding schools.

Locally, the private boys school is well known to have a drugs problem. The girls' private school and the co-ed private school don't seem to have the same reputation. My dd (year 13) has never been exposed to drugs in her state comp. Though she did have a friend at a different state comp who seemed to smoke a lot of weed.

The drug of choice at state schools often seems to be alcohol. I presume that's because it's cheaper?

Changeau · 06/04/2023 12:18

MrsBennetsPoorNerves · 06/04/2023 12:17

My privately educated friends were definitely more exposed to drugs than I was at my state comprehensive. Especially those who were at boarding schools.

Locally, the private boys school is well known to have a drugs problem. The girls' private school and the co-ed private school don't seem to have the same reputation. My dd (year 13) has never been exposed to drugs in her state comp. Though she did have a friend at a different state comp who seemed to smoke a lot of weed.

The drug of choice at state schools often seems to be alcohol. I presume that's because it's cheaper?

Same at my dds private boarding school. They are happy to drink!

shutthewindownow · 06/04/2023 12:18

Why are you surprised I'd be surprised if it didn't happen. Drugs are literally everywhere now !

Crocodilekneecaps · 06/04/2023 12:18

Lots of drugs in private schools, I live near a very well known day school, lots of the local dealer/gangsters send their kids there and pay their fees in cash. It’s common knowledge.

Changeau · 06/04/2023 12:19

Dd tells me that the police are at the local state very regularly and there are loads of drugs there. I guess we all have different experiences.

Mutabiliss · 06/04/2023 12:19

Easterfunbun · 06/04/2023 11:54

@Changeau

Certainly was the case when I was at school and I’m 34. The drug of choice at our state was cannabis. I was unusual in that I had two sets of friends. One at my school and another set that I had been introduced too by new step father at the time. Yes they did have harder drugs, mostly class A. They just seemed more dumb in comparison to my state school friends. A bit like, nothing bad could ever happen to them which I think in a way did stem from a sense of entitlement and othering. Oh no, only bad things happen to other people. Me and my friends were much more wary over drugs but then we did have more education within school at the time. I was the Leah Betts era and pretty terrified of even taking one pill. I remember my friends in the private school next to us didn’t even watch those videos at school.

Yes, this matches my experience of state vs private. The private school kids did harder drugs and were fearless, they didn't run when they saw a police car in town or worry about anyone who reacted badly to drugs.

Crocodilekneecaps · 06/04/2023 12:20

Changeau · 06/04/2023 12:19

Dd tells me that the police are at the local state very regularly and there are loads of drugs there. I guess we all have different experiences.

How would she know ?

TheaBrandt · 06/04/2023 12:21

It’s not state v private thing it’s whether your child is in the party set or not

MsSquiz · 06/04/2023 12:22

Drugs are rife in the majority of secondary schools. But fee paying schools tend to have a "better standard" of drugs available.

This was how it was when I was in a fee paying secondary and had family members in state secondaries, and I'm now in my late 30s.

LexMitior · 06/04/2023 12:23

@Changeau - your post is rather naive.

Either your daughter is as naive as you, or she is telling you what you want to hear. Academic schools have clever pupils, and clever people are not so stupid as to say things directly.

TheaBrandt · 06/04/2023 12:23

One of mine is one is not. Dd1 is studious and careful and has a lovely group of good girl friends (state). Minimal risk there. . Dd2 rackets round town and goes to lots of parties with a mixed group of state and private which is more concerning…

Changeau · 06/04/2023 12:25

Crocodilekneecaps · 06/04/2023 12:20

How would she know ?

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Because she has friends there and they put it on social media - she's shown me photos on Snapchat.

Changeau · 06/04/2023 12:26

LexMitior · 06/04/2023 12:23

@Changeau - your post is rather naive.

Either your daughter is as naive as you, or she is telling you what you want to hear. Academic schools have clever pupils, and clever people are not so stupid as to say things directly.

It's really extraordinary how a random on the internet knows more about my dd and my dds school than I do. Statements like that just make you sound stupid.

Crocodilekneecaps · 06/04/2023 12:26

Changeau · 06/04/2023 12:25

Because she has friends there and they put it on social media - she's shown me photos on Snapchat.

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And you don’t think the same goes on at her school ? You are ridiculously naive

TizerorFizz · 06/04/2023 12:27

My DDs were at private boarding schools snd they had a lot of drugs education. It’s inevitable there’s more drug taking in state schools. 90% of DC go to them! It’s often drugs in families and whether you want drugs or not. Obviously the vast majority don’t. Those that do seek them out. It has always been the same. The only DC I know of where there have been huge drug issues were state educated. However nothing to do with the schools. They wanted drugs.

Also don’t tell me that all the robberies for drug money are done by privately educated Dc. Are county lines privately educated Dc? I think not.

Changeau · 06/04/2023 12:28

Crocodilekneecaps · 06/04/2023 12:26

And you don’t think the same goes on at her school ? You are ridiculously naive

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Of course it doesn't. Honestly it is you that is naive and blinkered. Someone told you once that boarding schools have loads of drugs and despite actual current parents telling you that isn't always the case you cannot be told otherwise.

Crocodilekneecaps · 06/04/2023 12:28

TizerorFizz · 06/04/2023 12:27

My DDs were at private boarding schools snd they had a lot of drugs education. It’s inevitable there’s more drug taking in state schools. 90% of DC go to them! It’s often drugs in families and whether you want drugs or not. Obviously the vast majority don’t. Those that do seek them out. It has always been the same. The only DC I know of where there have been huge drug issues were state educated. However nothing to do with the schools. They wanted drugs.

Also don’t tell me that all the robberies for drug money are done by privately educated Dc. Are county lines privately educated Dc? I think not.

County lines is a very different issue involving vulnerable kids, threats and grooming

Crocodilekneecaps · 06/04/2023 12:29

Changeau · 06/04/2023 12:28

Of course it doesn't. Honestly it is you that is naive and blinkered. Someone told you once that boarding schools have loads of drugs and despite actual current parents telling you that isn't always the case you cannot be told otherwise.

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I’ve worked in a variety of schools for over 25 years. You are stupidly naive.

TheaBrandt · 06/04/2023 12:29

Not sure this is one you can buy my your way out of. Education /secure boundary parenting and good communication all you can do.

LexMitior · 06/04/2023 12:29

@Changeau - but you have asked a bunch of randoms on the internet. And all you have said, my daughter says not. Is this assurance not authoritative enough for you?

Do you usually take comfort in the internet and why then are you not listening to your very clever daughter? According to you, she has all the answers and you are then most wise, and an excellent mother.

Changeau · 06/04/2023 12:31

Crocodilekneecaps · 06/04/2023 12:29

I’ve worked in a variety of schools for over 25 years. You are stupidly naive.

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I don't care what you've done. I can tell you that there is not a drugs problem at dds school. All three dds went there. There was the odd party group who took ket when they went home to London and that's it. I also have good friends who teach there and they have confirmed drugs are not an issue.

Changeau · 06/04/2023 12:33

LexMitior · 06/04/2023 12:29

@Changeau - but you have asked a bunch of randoms on the internet. And all you have said, my daughter says not. Is this assurance not authoritative enough for you?

Do you usually take comfort in the internet and why then are you not listening to your very clever daughter? According to you, she has all the answers and you are then most wise, and an excellent mother.

If a current boarding parent joins the thread and says yes drugs are rife at my dds school then I'll listen.

Luckydip1 · 06/04/2023 12:33

Coke in private schools and weed in state schools.

stillavid · 06/04/2023 12:35

@TheaBrandt totally agree with you regarding which 'set/crowd' your DC hang with being the main issue.

Drugs are in every school and anyone who doesn't realise that is a little naive. It is how the school deals with it that is important.

It doesn't help that it seems to be easier now for 16 and 17 year olds to get hold of drugs than have a sneaky underage drink.