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Secondary education

Connect with other parents whose children are starting secondary school on this forum.

Original poster

Abingdon School

26 replies

Schoolz · 22/11/2022 14:21

Hi, has anyone got any recent experience with Abingdon? I’ve looked at the old threads on here and am aware of some controversies. I’ve also heard people say they love the school and their boys are very happy there

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Original poster
Schoolz · 22/11/2022 14:24

Sorry, posted too soon. I’ve heard some people say it’s a hot house and boys will be pushed out if they drop to B grades, and others say that’s not the case at all and that there’s a good balance between academics, activities and wellbeing. I’d love to hear any views from current parents. Thank you

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Khix · 22/11/2022 14:26

A family member attends Abingdon and he has enjoyed his time there. Very good educationally, teacher support is fantastic and he has made wonderful friends. There is a lot of homework however and pressure on the students to achieve but the only thing he really complains about is the lunch food! :)

Original poster
Schoolz · 22/11/2022 17:29

Khix · 22/11/2022 14:26

A family member attends Abingdon and he has enjoyed his time there. Very good educationally, teacher support is fantastic and he has made wonderful friends. There is a lot of homework however and pressure on the students to achieve but the only thing he really complains about is the lunch food! :)

That’s really helpful - thank you

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Jenny12345 · 31/01/2023 20:23

We have been at abingdon since September.
It's a great school but there is a lot of expectation foe the boys to succeed and to put in 100% effort into everything that they do.
I would say you would need to be comfortable in the top set in prep school to really be comfortable at abingdon.
It's a academic school and lessons quiete pacey.

Jenny12345 · 31/01/2023 20:24

There are many different clubs and activities at abingdon but academics is at the centre of everything a boy will do

MoiraRoseRules · 31/01/2023 20:50

My son started in year 7 from state primary & overall we’re pleased with it.
good points:
So organised. Communication excellent. Patience for boys to make mistakes while learning how it all works.
Amazing opportunities across the extra-curricular stuff which they have to engage in.
Sport is at different levels - matches up and running for A team but B and C team for less able / interested!
Pastoral care has been decent in that there is a good response re any worries - DS is quite a worrier.
Efforts to make things fun & the teaching & classes seem to be good.
Wide range of boys - sporty / musical / academic / geeky etc! Not a type.
Parents of all sorts & not overly flashy. Ie, not in it for the social cachet.
Longer holidays offset some of the termly tiredness
Year 7 takes mainly from state primaries so a reasonably level playing field - then yr 9 intake is from prep schools.

challenges
Fast-paced!
Quite a lot of homework each day though possible to get some done in prep.
Long days from getting the bus to leaving school at 5.15 every day.
Suddenly go from being ‘pretty bright’ at village primary to mixing with some super brainy & talented kids!

I have seen the PSHE topics for all years and they are tackling some of the issues that plagued the school re sexism and misogyny. I don’t kid myself that a boys school can rule it all out but I’m aware boys in mixed schools share those views too. So far I’ve not had any whiffs of bragging / arrogance etc coming home but DS probably would avoid those sorts.

We did no tuition but did prepare using the eleven plus books. Hope all this helps. I think it is a fantastic school but do worry at times that sensitive DS will find it demanding at times but so far he enjoys the focus in lessons, behaviour not being an issue, the good lessons & he’s made friends.

Jenny12345 · 01/02/2023 06:09

I agree with all of this. Abingdon is not for a sensitive boy. I would probably look elsewhere for 2nd DS as he is more sensitive. It is a mature relationship between teachers and pupils in Year 9. The tutor and housemaster are both oxford graduates so a boy has to be able to handle these type of situations well.

Original poster
Schoolz · 11/02/2023 16:42

Thank you. it’s great to hear that the pastoral care is good and they are tackling sexism and misogyny. He is quite a sensitive boy so although in top sets at his prep, I’m worried about the pressure of keeping up - especially in maths which he finds more difficult. How many hours of homework are they expected to do each day?

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MoiraRoseRules · 12/02/2023 20:44

My son does prep (supervised homework at school) 2/3 times a week but some nights will have one or two pieces of homework, it is a fair amount but he is managing.

He has found maths, physics & languages tricky but is thriving in other subjects so we are working on resilience & I keep saying he just has to keep up, not set the world alight! He’s really enjoying some subjects and has a nice bunch of friends.

Jenny12345 · 23/02/2023 19:34

The homework is a fair amount. The academic level is completely different to what the boys were used to at prep school. They have from 98% in Maths to 50%. You have got to be really confident and resilient to swallow that pill.

stickystick · 28/02/2023 12:27

Does anyone know anything about the boarding at Abingdon?
Also is it compulsory to do rugby in Y9?

UKMum2021 · 28/02/2023 12:55

stickystick · 28/02/2023 12:27

Does anyone know anything about the boarding at Abingdon?
Also is it compulsory to do rugby in Y9?

I would not recommend boarding at Abingdon. Very few boys board at Abingdon and most of them are international students.

Somersetmumz · 05/03/2023 10:15

My Son went to Abingdon and had a bad experience. He has mild Dyspraxia, which they tried to punish out of him and ended up destroying his confidence. Teachers (one in particular) were deaf to any discussion around making allowances and actively tried to manage him out to school as a result. We moved in the end to a fantastic school in Somerset who made some small adjustments for him, and turned him back into a confident happy young boy. He's just left with top A levels so it was the right decision and I'm glad we made the move.

To be fair, there were some very happy parents and children there, but we were not among them.

Sarain · 05/03/2023 12:10

It's a big jolly school. It has its issues but it doesn't get much better for a boys day school. They do not "manage you out" but you need to meet the criteria for sixth form subjects just like any other school. They push the boys to perform but it's not MCS. They take a big chunk from their own prep which is the easiest way in. Their own prep boys won't join until year 9 so they are running parallel year 7/8 groups on two sites.

Jenny12345 · 20/03/2023 19:40

Sorry to hear your experience somersetzmumz.
Abingdon is a big, busy school with high demands from the boys. Like I originally said unless your boy is bright,strong,fairly thick skinned it may not be the place for him.

Kune · 20/03/2023 21:45

I'd agree that it's not a school for SEN. Any boy with even relatively mild needs would do well to look elsewhere.

Jenny12345 · 21/03/2023 08:55

I think all schools are great but as a parent you really have to dig deep into senior schools. How they teach and how they talk to children. For someone sensitive St edwards may serve better or even for someone who dies not get things in the flick of a second. Let's be honest there are any ways of getting those As and A*

appleth · 21/03/2023 12:06

So boarder mainly international students? Any ideas how many as boarder?
how about bully case ? My son never joined Boys school before so please share what young student (year 9 ) joining school has to face?
thx u

stickystick · 30/09/2023 19:48

We just went to an open day. 98% of the boarders are international (nearly all Chinese). I don’t think that’s good. What’s the point in coming all the way from China just to live with 50 other Chinese boys? And it’s not much fun for the tiny handful who are not Chinese.

3kidslondonlife · 08/10/2023 09:42

Hi everyone - we sadly missed the open day this year, but we went to the prep school for a private tour. We found the headmaster there (Craig Williams) excellent and he answered our questions very well. I do wonder how much the pace must change from the prep school to the senior school though ? The prep is 250 boys and the senior school over 1,000 - did anyone on this thread go through that transition with their boys? I’m just curious if the pastoral excellence of the prep school can really be replicated in a school 4 times the size!

Jenny12345 · 09/10/2023 20:14

Abingdon is a big boys school. Its very busy but everyone knows where they need to be. They are in a house and the housemaster is almost like a "mini headteacher".
We have found our housemaster to be excellent.

MoiraRoseRules · 07/11/2023 20:13

It depends on whether you’d use the prep school or enter your son into year 7 / first year in the big school.
At the main school, the first and second years are kept together in their own ‘lower school’ with its own houseroom; it functions as its own house. The head of lower school is fantastic and everything is as @Jenny12345 says - everyone knows where they should be and what they are doing.

There will be a big jump at year nine / third year with all the boys entering at 13 from preps (many lower school boys have come from state primaries at 11) but they will have the advantage of knowing the school already.

Unless you choose a tiny secondary school I think it’s always a big shift from primary / prep.

HopefulMama10 · 27/03/2024 20:18

Hi - I have just read this thread with interest.

We have just been offered a place at Abingdon for our son into year 9 in September. He is bright, not sensitive and fairly robust in sport and most subjects, hence we thought Abingdon would be a good fit.

I was delighted to be offered a place at Abingdon, however have heard (from multiple different boys in different year groups in son’s current school) rumours of serious bullying, sexism and inappropriate digital behaviours towards girls.

I was wondering if anyone at the school or with friends or family there had experienced this? I am honestly feeling sick that I have to make this decision, and don’t feel able to make it based on either a) what the school PR machine says or b) rumours from teenage boys!

Any insight would be very greatly appreciated, thanks

Original poster
Schoolz · 28/03/2024 16:16

HopefulMama10 · 27/03/2024 20:18

Hi - I have just read this thread with interest.

We have just been offered a place at Abingdon for our son into year 9 in September. He is bright, not sensitive and fairly robust in sport and most subjects, hence we thought Abingdon would be a good fit.

I was delighted to be offered a place at Abingdon, however have heard (from multiple different boys in different year groups in son’s current school) rumours of serious bullying, sexism and inappropriate digital behaviours towards girls.

I was wondering if anyone at the school or with friends or family there had experienced this? I am honestly feeling sick that I have to make this decision, and don’t feel able to make it based on either a) what the school PR machine says or b) rumours from teenage boys!

Any insight would be very greatly appreciated, thanks

Oh no, this sounds awful! Our son is due to start in September too. Hoping someone will come along to say this isn’t their experience of the school…

OP posts:
scarletbegoniass · 28/03/2024 16:52

HopefulMama10 · 27/03/2024 20:18

Hi - I have just read this thread with interest.

We have just been offered a place at Abingdon for our son into year 9 in September. He is bright, not sensitive and fairly robust in sport and most subjects, hence we thought Abingdon would be a good fit.

I was delighted to be offered a place at Abingdon, however have heard (from multiple different boys in different year groups in son’s current school) rumours of serious bullying, sexism and inappropriate digital behaviours towards girls.

I was wondering if anyone at the school or with friends or family there had experienced this? I am honestly feeling sick that I have to make this decision, and don’t feel able to make it based on either a) what the school PR machine says or b) rumours from teenage boys!

Any insight would be very greatly appreciated, thanks

In all honesty, I think you would be hard put to find a school – whether it be private/state, all boys or co-ed – that doesn’t have a problem with that currently. Of course some are worse than others, but if Abingdon boys does have a problem with sexual harassment, it isn’t unique within Abingdon-on-Thames, let alone nationally. Sexual harassment is pretty rife within the state schools in the town, all of which are co-ed. Being schooled with girls doesn’t make you automatically respect them.

Chances are, there’s going to be behaviour that is disrespectful towards women and girls from certain boys wherever he goes. Whether or not he thinks thats okay or engages with it, is surely due to other influences ie. his parents.

And for what it’s worth, I haven’t heard anything particularly heinous about the students behaviour towards girls. I’ve heard worse regarding Radley and MCS.