Issue with school uniform

[JaneStiler]

My DC has just started year 8 and there is a slight problem with his uniform. Last year he always dressed smartly with his shirt tucked in, tie fastened, top button done up and blazer on. However the first 2 days of year 8 he has both times left with his shirt hanging out and a short tie with a fat knot in addition to the top button undone and no blazer. He says everyone else wears their uniform like this and is desperate I let him leave looking like a scruff pot. How do parents even let their kids go to school like that??? Very scruffy and Messy! What do I do? Should I let him do one of the above? Really not sure what to do. Would appreciate any tips and help on the situation and would love to know how your children dress? Thanks for the help!!

Pick your battles. My mum always used to insist I unrolled my skirt before I left the house, I did, then rolled it back up again before I was at the end of the road. As long as you have supplied the correct uniform leave your child to it- the school will tell them if they have a problem

I'm already out the house myself some days when the kids go off, including my DS in Y8

They've both been told that I will supply the correct uniform items, if they choose not to wear them properly then that's between them and the school. They are on school transport so if they get a detention is a long old journey home on two service buses which is also a bit of an incentive...

Realistically what can you do?. You've supplied the correct uniform. He can wear it however he wants & if he gets a detention then that's on him.

You have two choices-

1. Let him choose.
2. Make him leave the house looking smart but knowing his shirt will he untucked and tie tucked in when he's out of sight.

Well of course not, but he's not a man. He's a child.

Does he have a bedroom like a grown man would have? And watch programmes a man would watch? And go to bars and date women?

Do you treat him like a man? Or does he have restrictions that apply to children. Like telling you where he is going and when he will be home.

Thanks for the replies. I have made my decision and that is to let him leave for school with his shirt hanging out, tie with a fat knot and short, top button undone and he can leave his blazer at home. I still think it is ridiculously messy and informal however kids will be kids. And as he is desperate and says it’s normal why not let him, shouldn’t affect his learning

This is the kind of situation where schools could sort the issue if they had the will. A few mornings at the start of term making everyone sort themselves out (in the rain?) before entering might make for less trouble later in the year.
Children will follow rules that are applied. If school doesn't enforce uniform rules then they can't be surprised if they aren't followed.

That said, DD's old HT said teens need something to rebel against, so if you let them rebel against how they wear uniform that need is satisfied and they won't feel so obliged to rebel somewhere else that might be harmful.

Sounds completely normal to me. Mass rebellion year 8 style 😀

Unless the school intervenes, there is nothing you can do.

JaneStiler
However the first 2 days of year 8 he has both times left with his shirt hanging out and a short tie with a fat knot in addition to the top button undone and no blazer.

How do parents even let their kids go to school like that???

You tell us😀

Seriously, relax.

OP - have you never been a teenager?! It's so important to fit in. I let my year 8 daughter shorten her skirt and not wear a blazer because that's what her friends so and it's important to belong. My daughter spends her morning working on her "look" but only 3 mins on packing her bag 🤦‍♀️

at my old school the uniform was long sleeve shirt, tie tight, waistcoat fully buttoned, blazer fully buttoned. Sometimes people wouldn’t do their top button up because it was so hot- but they would have to do it up again, then run a lap outside in the heat in full uniform. i think you should force your kid to wear it right.

For the first week of year 7 we tried to send our son off looking properly that was it, he has to abide by the school after that it's up to him what he does

Unclench a bit OP. He will change his uniform as soon as he is at the end of the road anyway and it just starts everyone's day off with a shit start. I think this is a prime example of why schools should adapt and let hoodies and joggers/leggings etc.... as uniform. You don't have any of this hassle that way.

They all do it, whatever parents and teachers say.

DD's school have pretied ties that you can't mess with, and a uniform that is reasonably hard to make look terrible.

I went to a school that put us all in navy jersey roll-necks under a v-neck jumper ... impossible to make look different or scruffy. So we wore the wrong colour socks instead.