GCSE's 2023 - Feeling my anxiety rise! Anyone want to join a thread?

[BumblingBy]

Just that really. My first child is taking her GCSE's next year and I have no idea what to expect. Currently I am much more stressed than her which isn't going to help anything! She struggled last year with Spanish so I suggested that she do 10 mins vocab a day over the holidays so she goes back feeling confident, but that was met with a real lack of enthusiasm/ accusations of interfering! She has good predictions - 6 & 7's which she will need to get to stay on at her state 6th form, but I feel that she might not get those if she doesn't put in a bit more effort. Should I lay off her for the holidays? School don't appear to have set much, although she has lots of art to do but that she finds a pleasure which helps. Anyone else feeling nervous?

I think there is already a thread? I'll try to link.

Thank you!!!

General starting Y10 Sept 21, GCSE's 2023 thread www.mumsnet.com/Talk/secondary/4321115-General-starting-Y10-Sept-21-GCSEs-2023-thread

Think it's this one.

Mine is a year longer but uses an app called Duolingo to help with Spanish. he says it's good.

@Plumbear2 She has done some Duolingo but she finds the AQA vocab card sets better - if I can get her to do them that is! I am finding it very hard to get her to do anything, she is a very grown up almost 16 year old (much older for her age than her siblings if that makes sense) and she is furious if I try and interfere in her school life at all.

Thank you OP, I'm also feeling nervous for ds.

Duolingo is a favourite in our home, because it gets you thinking in the language.
I think be careful about letting her see your stress. I know from bitter experience how much pressure they are under (dc gets their results end of the month). She can't have you adding to it. You just need to promote good study habits, make sure she has a quiet space for an hour a day as well as chill out time. Most importantly plenty of sleep.

@PrimeMinAuguster
Are you a first timer too? Sending hugs!

@PutinIsAWarCriminal thanks for your message, I know you are right. Its just so hard to feel a bit powerless. I was actually quite in to revision (weird I know) and did better in exams than my intelligence deserved as I would doggedly stick to a revision routine and get it done. My youngest it like me, my eldest like my husband who did as little as possible but was very bright and did well because of this and despite the revision (middle one is somewhere in the middle lucky thing). The other thing I find hard is that the revision is so much on iPads /laptops so I don't know if she is really on snapchat etc during her revision time. Give me an old fashioned highlighter and some index cards anyday!
Good luck with results, will send out positive vibes for you x

Yes! And prone to fretting😊aarrg. It will be fine!

Ds going into year 11, but in Wales they often sit GCSEs in year 10 so we have some results coming next week. Feeling very nervous as sitting exams was so new to him, they had no practice at all. At least if they are not great he can resit and it looks like they might sit some maths papers in November.

Lay off. She will probably have mocks this autumn and that will be a wake up call if she's slipping.
My son was not academic but I did what I could - printed off reams of past papers, helped set a revision schedule, bought extra help books etc. but it was down to him in the end and he didn't revise enough and did pretty badly. It hurt his confidence more than actually had a bearing on his career (he went to vocational college and did well on his course though covid had a huge impact on the practical side).
My daughter did not need any of the above - she is academic and put enough pressure on herself (and was rewarded with mostly 8s and 9s). She sits A levels in the next year and is already stressed about it and has set her own revision tasks for the summer. Ironically she does not need particularly good grades for what she wants to do (she needs an outstanding portfolio), but she wants to do the best she can.
Support and encourage. Do not nag and harass - all that does is creates a resentful child and a strained relationship. How they handle the exams is down to them.

@mumonthehill the Welsh system seems sensible to spread the worry out! Do you get to pick which ones you do in which year.
hope it all goes well - is it results next week? X

@mondaytosunday that is such good advice thank you. My biggest worry is that by expected of her what I would have done that I will add to her stress and damage our relationship.
I find it so interesting how different my 3 children are. Put eldest on a sports pitch and she will give everything she has and she is deeply competitive. But with work she doesn’t seem to strive in same way even though she is bright. Youngest is the other way round, works so hard. This is despite going to same schools.

No they did not pick! Done English lit, 1 paper for history, 1 paper for RS, PE and 1 paper for each of biology, chemistry and physics. They also did the English Lang oral before they broke up. It does ease the stress for next summer, but only if they do well now!!

My eldest is going into year 11 in a couple of weeks and even before they finished for summer was totally dreading this last year of high school. She doesn’t cope well with all the pressure school seem to be putting on them and is convinced she’ll not get a place at college (luckily until recently I worked in an FE college so know what school are telling them is absolute rubbish and we’ve looked at some courses together see that she is more than capable of getting the required grades).

It doesn’t help that she has dyslexia and before Whitsun half term they took all her exam concessions off her as she wasn’t deemed as struggling enough, so we’ve been having discussions as to what else she can access to get her the support she needs.

Dreading when term starts again as she’s been a different person over the summer.

Oh totally OP! We are a fairly academic family (I have a masters, there are several doctors and lawyers), but that just was not the way for my son. Put my god he will get up every day at 6am to get to the gym before work, sometimes go back afterwards or go to football practice. and for years he was out there early Sundays in the mud and rain for rugby practice. I tried to make the analogy of how hard he had to work at the gym to see results and that it is the same with schoolwork. But he is passionate about fitness, couldn't care less about history or English.
My daughter is the opposite. While she doesn't mind kicking a football around she is fairly low energy but loves her art and music and writing. Both are extremely disciplined about food though, which is odd, as I'm certainly not.
One has to accept that they are responsible for their own lives. You can't study for them nor sit the exams. Unfortunately wisdom doesn't seem to be something you can bestow - it comes with age and experience!

Saying hi on this thread to bookmark, will go and join the other thread and hopefully one of them will be more active this year than the y10 thread I joined last September!

Yes, me too!
Can only deduce everyone was very laid back about their Y10's last year, which is good I guess.

Morning all, yes I feel anxious too...my dd is very relaxed but I am sure it will hit her soon.

She knows she will need to focus more this year but knowing it and doing it our two totally different things. She didn't do too well in the Summer exams- I think it is because the penny didn't drop, mocks are round the corner..

My ds will be going into Year 13 while my dd will be entering year 11! Honestly if I could forward this year, that will be brilliant!!

Good luck to all parents and children this year and thank god we have this thread, which is an amazing support for us all.x

DD took the Y10 summer mocks very seriously and it made me rather anxious for next year and the extreme levels of worry we are likely to get then. I keep emphasizing that GCSE's are only the keys to the next stage and not the be-all-and-end-all of everything. Much more difficult to see when you are 15 though.

I'm also feeling a bit anxious as DD2 has twice as much to learn for her GCSEs than her DD1 had for her exams this year.

The other thread hasn't had any posts since June

It seems like we are all feeling the same! I feel so powerless to help my DD as she gets cross and emotional if I get too involved but then gets sucked up in the usual distractions - phones, shopping, friends, sport! It’s a bit like when DC were little and I had to stop myself wading in and doing their colouring in when it went out the lines, I almost want to dive in to her revision myself and just get the job done 😂

has anyone got any good resource tips? I found this book good (I read it as thought it would be greeted with distinct lack of enthusiasm if I presented it to her!) it actually made me think about how I work too and I have made a few adjustments based on it.