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Secondary education

Connect with other parents whose children are starting secondary school on this forum.

Original poster

2022 Year 8 parents support group

45 replies

WhatTheFuckingHell · 16/08/2022 08:04

Thought this might be a good idea, for advice, support or just a shoulder to cry on as our little baby’s are getting so big!!
my dd is 12, starting year 8 in September. We are in London.
apologies if this has already been done!
whatthefuckinghell xx

OP posts:
TeenDivided · 16/08/2022 09:06

You may want to ask for this to be in Secondary Education, (you will find similar threads there, though often y8 is a relatively 'stress free' year).

Original poster
WhatTheFuckingHell · 16/08/2022 09:12

Ah will do thank you!

OP posts:
Summersunhopefully · 16/08/2022 10:18

Good idea to start this thread! My dd is at a London all-girls school. Year 6 was challenging for her with being ostracised from her friendship group. She has a good group of friends now (in and outside of school) but things are still a bit up and down when at school. So complicated growing up! Hope year 8 is a good year with not too much drama 🤞🤞🤞How did your dd find year 7 WhatTheFuckingHell?

MissDollyMix · 16/08/2022 10:21

Great idea for a thread. My DS is also starting year 8 this year and I’m pleased to hear it’s considered a stress free year- here’s hoping!!

Original poster
WhatTheFuckingHell · 16/08/2022 10:22

She found it quite hard, she wasn’t well most of year six so wasn’t in for the transition talks. Now she is looking forward to seeing her friends and her teachers are very nice. What about your dd @Summersunhopefully?

OP posts:
Summersunhopefully · 16/08/2022 10:30

My dd found starting year 7 quite exciting and made a good group of friends. She always finds there are 1 or 2 girls who make mean comments/go off and finds this hard (I think due to what happened in year 6). She seems to get on well with people/is pretty sociable/ item hanging out with friends. I’m trying to build her resilience so she finds it easier to cope when people a mean/exclude her (low level eg pass notes to each other and leave her out even tho she sits between the girls).

Summersunhopefully · 16/08/2022 10:30

Is often not item!!

Singleandproud · 16/08/2022 10:55

My DD is also in year 8.

I teach at a local secondary and year 8 is generally a low stress year (before the hell that is Yr 9). They should be settled in their new school now and encouraged to get involved in drama, sport, science clubs etc it will help build friendships and participation in these groups starts to dwindle in year 9 as the academic work gets trickier.

Friendship groups tend to develop away from the core Primary school friends they tend to cling to at the beginning of Yr 7. Friendship issues tend to rear the heads in this year groups particularly amongst girls who can get nasty.

Keep a tight look on what's going on in their social media, and a reminder (again) not to send inappropriate pictures which is scarily common despite the children knowing not to but in Yr 8 many start their first relationships.

Feetache · 21/08/2022 23:19

Great advice @Singleandproud
I'm looking forward to hopefully less fall outs from old primary mates etc and a more settled year. My DD has adhd so whilst she seems ok, she emotionally immature which does concern me. I suspect her first relationship will be with a girl not a boy.

MalloryMae · 21/08/2022 23:33

Adding myself on as I have a DD going into Y8 too. This thread could be very useful - thanks!

Circleoffifths · 22/08/2022 07:54

I am just popping in as I don’t have a DC going into Year 8. But am interested in the posts about Year 8 being relatively low stress. My DD has just finished Year 10. Year 8 was a very difficult year for her with her mental health. My DS has just finished Year 8 and his behaviour took a nosedive compared to Year 7. Not looking forward to Year 9 for him going by @Singleandproud’s post!

TeenDivided · 22/08/2022 08:00

I was the one who said stress free. Maybe that wasn't fair. It can be a bit of a 'lost' year if you don't watch out. They aren't shiny new y7s, aren't choosing options, and aren't doing GCSEs. Some can take their foot off the pedal behaviour or work wise. I guess I just meant there are no intrinsic stresses for y8 (unless your school does a 3 year KS4).

2reefsin30knots · 22/08/2022 08:00

My DS is going into Y8. He just turned 12 least week. He's in his last year of prep school though, so not at 'big school' yet. I'm hoping for a nice year- being at the top of the school with entrance exams finished (although scholarships still to go), putting on plays and playing cricket.

I will be so, so sad at the end though. 😔

Singleandproud · 22/08/2022 11:58

I said it was a low stress year,
Year 7 is stressful as they are starting a new school,

Year 9 appears stressful (I don't have a Yr 9 of my own yet) because the vast majority of students are in the middle of puberty with everything that goes with it, I always find the behaviour in this year group harder to manage in class. At home students are finding their own feet and want independence whilst still being a child, for some children their dating relationships become much more serious.

Year 10 behaviour in class tends to improve but there are still friendship issues and challenging parental boundaries at home.

Year 11 students are stressed as they suddenly realize they have their big exams and they do actually matter for what they want to do next.

Mental health issues tend to rear their head during puberty and I believe for boys as they start later the peak tends to be when they are around university age.

Puberty also makes things alot more difficult for children who are neuro diverse but they appear to settle down towards the end of High school.

ethelredonagoodday · 22/08/2022 12:08

Adding as I have a DD about to start Y8. Good idea for a thread!

Walkingbkwrm · 23/08/2022 13:26

Yes, good idea - I have a DS going into yr 8. I hope it’s a mostly stress free year though his school does a 3 year KS3 so will be picking options in March which could be interesting…..

Dalaidramailama · 24/08/2022 11:47

Pastoral worker here. Year 8 is a smooth year. They’ve done their transition, hopefully settled in and made friends and no looming exams on the horizon.

My sons just heading into year 8 and all seems calm.

Year 9 though? ….. well that’s another story 🤦‍♀️. Year 9s are massive twats. I do love them though I promise 😂.

Geometric · 27/08/2022 08:39

Will join, as I have a ds starting y8, as well as an older one starting year 10. And yes I can agree with the above, I completely understand why year 9 drive teachers spare!

DS2 is very young (age, size and interests) in his year, but settled in well to year 7 and made nice friends despite my concerns, and was able to hold his own with some of the more obnoxious ones. Hoping he’ll enjoy not being the youngest year any more, and spread his wings in getting more involved in some of the things on offer.

MissDollyMix · 27/08/2022 23:37

Geometric · 27/08/2022 08:39

Will join, as I have a ds starting y8, as well as an older one starting year 10. And yes I can agree with the above, I completely understand why year 9 drive teachers spare!

DS2 is very young (age, size and interests) in his year, but settled in well to year 7 and made nice friends despite my concerns, and was able to hold his own with some of the more obnoxious ones. Hoping he’ll enjoy not being the youngest year any more, and spread his wings in getting more involved in some of the things on offer.

Your DS2 sounds exactly the same as mine! Also hoping that year 8 brings more confidence and getting a bit more involved.

PawFives · 27/08/2022 23:56

Following as DD will be going into Y8. Hopefully it will be ‘low stress’ as described by PP but a little worried, as for me Y8 ( or ‘second year’ as we called it - I’m old!) was was easily my least favourite year at secondary school.

MissDollyMix · 29/08/2022 00:25

Year 8 was definitely the year I started to fall behind academically. I’m going to be keeping an eye out for ds to try and make sure history doesn’t repeat itself.

Tailrunner · 29/08/2022 01:03

I have a DD going in to year 8 too and hoping it is a nice, stress free year for her. She is lovely but quite sensitive/shy and I worried about her going to secondary. Year 7 was good though - she joined some drama and sports clubs and made some great new friends. There was 1 girl who caused some issues in her friend group and I know DD is anxious about how that will go next year so fingers crossed it settles down. I teach secondary and find year 8 is pretty calm compared to most years (yes year 9s, I'm looking at you!). Here's hoping it's a good one for all our DC.

Singleandproud · 06/09/2022 01:02

Well when I said Yr 8 was a low stress year I clearly didn't take into account DD having a massively growth spurt and her trying on her new shirts before I ironed them for tomorrow to find they didn't even meet in the middle (they fit perfectly when I ordered them a month ago. Queue a hectic rush to Asda at 9.30pm (only shop open around here) to try and pick some up, only DD is very tall and also needs a shirt with a revere neck. Ended up with a normal shirt, still a size smaller than she needs but bigger than her other ones.

This is on top of the debacle of the uniform shop not stocking the size trousers she needs, she's too tall for the likes of supermarkets, Next and M&S. Ordered online only to find they'd been discontinued. Had to order from the 'tall' womens tailoring and it turns out its neigh on impossible to find plain mid grey trouse, still not entirely sure her trousers are the right shade of grey.

DD has ASC tendencies although doesn't have a diagnosis and will be massively thrown tomorrow for not being in the correct uniform. I have contacted her head of year to explain the trouser problem and they were very understanding, have scheduled an email for tomorrow am explaining the shirt. Fingers crossed the uniform shop has some in stock in her size when I go afterwork.

Walkingbkwrm · 06/09/2022 23:19

That sounds like a bit of a nightmare, @Singleandproud Hopefully it didn’t throw her too badly and you manage to find some properly fitting stuff soon.
Anyone else’s started yet? Here DS1 not back until Thursday. DS2 at primary went back today and thinks it’s very unfair!

XelaM · 06/09/2022 23:28

WhatTheFuckingHell · 16/08/2022 08:04

Thought this might be a good idea, for advice, support or just a shoulder to cry on as our little baby’s are getting so big!!
my dd is 12, starting year 8 in September. We are in London.
apologies if this has already been done!
whatthefuckinghell xx

👋🏻We're also in London and my daughter is also 12 and just started year 8 at a new school. She spends the whole morning getting ready and making sure her skirt is extremely short 🤦‍♀️