What to wear when touring a fee-paying school?

[MamaMeBe]

Smart casual I guess?

I don’t own any heels so are pumps or sandals acceptable with a knee-length dress/linen trousers?

Completely new to this & don’t wish to offend.

I wore jeans, hoodie and trainers to visit DS's fee paying school. 🤷‍♀️

Is it an Open Day? If so, there will be so many families, nobody will remember you anyway!

Either of those sound great. I wouldn’t wear heels as there may be quite a lot of walking and standing around - then again I’m not good in heels!

you’ll probably find people in lots of different things, but most will have made a bit of effort and wearing something similar to what you describe. No one will be judging you unless you’re in a disco diva outfit!

hope your tour goes well. 😀

Wear what you want to wear. Don’t go all dressed up.

@MamaMeBe Absolutely fine. I usually wear what I’ve got planned for work so business casual or if it’s not a working day something exactly like you’ve said.

I wore my gym stuff. Because I’d just come from the gym.

Love you lot! Thankyou! ⭐️ If ever there was an unwritten rule of a dress code, it would most definitely be me that would discover it!! 🙈

Every school I went to I wore jeans, top & blazer. Was probably overdressed with the blazer tbh. No one will care or remember what you wore - honestly.

Anything you want that's clean and not scruffy. While private schools may be more or less selective based on the child's academic or other performance, it's worth remembering that you're a potential customer who may be spending a huge amount of money with them.

As the parent of existing pupils, I would sometimes attend these open days to be able to give a parent view. Believe me, some people turned up looking like they were going to a film premier, some like they had been working under a car. Nobody cared how people were dressed. The school just wants your money at the end of the day, and they have no idea how rich or poor anyone is by their dress.

Wear whatever you want. We're not taking notes.

Jeans and a top. If it puts your mind at ease, we have quite a stuffy and formal speech day. One parent wore shorts and a T-shirt.

Other than the more formal school events, people really don't dress up at all. Jeans are fine.

We’ve just had our open day (fee paying school) and parents wore anything and everything, though the most common was jeans/tailored shorts and a jumper. If anyone was dressed up, I sort of assumed they’d come straight from work. Don’t overthink it.

I recommend clothes. Children will be present and nudity may attract attention . Seriously though smart casual is fine - I veered towards the smarter end for DD's actual interview but have been pretty relaxed for everything else. I don't think your clothes will be part of their judgment about your child (unless Eton!).

The school my daughter attends doesn’t do open days/evenings. They don’t need to. But prospective parents can call and request a tour which is done on a 1-1 basis. I went twice. The first time I wore a jumper and jeans with trainers and the second time it was red hot so we were both in shorts and t-shirts. No one really cares what you’re wearing.

I’m also of the mind that essentially you’re the customer and it shouldn’t matter what you wear - neat and clean, comfortable.
If they’re the type to judge your (the parent) clothes, then possibly not the right school for your child.
Good luck!

Fee paying schools are businesses. You are a potential customer and they need to please you, not you them. So you can pretty much wear what you want and feel comfortable in. Just avoid anything tight or skimpy at boys/mixed schools as you may be shown round by a pair of adolescent boys.

At DC school some of the richest parents (really rich!) turn up in jeans and jumpers. Think of the Queen at Balmoral for example.

I wore whatever I'd worn to work that day (it was pre-covid when I was still in the office every day and I came straight from work), so probably black jeans, trainers, black t shirt and blazer. DH wore jeans, t shirt and trainers. Everyone else was dressed similarly. But it wasn't Eton or Harrow!

Private schools can, at the risk of stating the obvious, be snooty. You and/or your kids might well end up being judged [by some, certainly not all fellow parents] at some point for one or more aspects of your dress, car, address, holidays, accent, academics, etc etc etc.

But you will never, ever, be judged by anyone halfway sensible for what you wear to an open day. It just couldn't ever happen.

Whatever you’d wear to look at any school.

I've been to ones after work where I have been wearing black trousers and a smart top and ones at a weekend where I have been wearing jeans and a t shirt. I've seen everything from gym wear to suits to parents who have come from their farm or construction site!

Be comfortable, there can be a lot of walking if there’s a lot of grounds or stairs if there are old buildings.
There will be a mix of what people wear and only very scruffy or very dressed up people are likely to raise eyebrows

At an open day, it really doesn't matter much. Wear whatever you are comfortable in.
Are school events such as a play or a concert, it's smart casual but not for an open day.

Echoing others to say just wear normal clothes. There will probably be a huge array of outfits depending on what people are doing that day.

Dress down.

Don’t wear big designer labels especially not on your handbag.

Don’t wear a bling watch.

For reasons too outing to mention I know a lot about this topic, and it’s always better to look inconspicuous and low maintenance. Even if people claim not to “judge” they are still reading you sub-consciously.

Depends on whether you want to be memorable or not. I once turned up to a fairly rural school on my bike with sensible clothes and my helmet, and was viewed with a fair amount of bemusement. At the end they said I could email with any further questions and just mention I was the bike lady and they would know who I was!!!!