Winchester vs St. Paul's School

[Montmajour]

DS has received 13+ offers from both these schools and we're really struggling to decide between them.

DS is quiet and laid-back, with a quirky sense of humour, interested in lots of things but hasn't really found his passion yet, currently happy but rather bored/not being stretched at his prep school. He's academically strong across all subjects, possibly leaning slightly more towards maths and sciences than humanities. He's only recently discovered an enthusiasm for sport (mainly football) but is philosophical that he's never going to be A team material. He's a bit of an introvert and likes his own company at times, but is mature and rubs along well with most of his classmates and has a small group of good friends. When applying to senior schools, he was adamant that he wanted somewhere very academic, and he achieved offers from both schools without any tutoring.

Because of Covid, we've had limited opportunities to visit either school or meet other prospective students in person, which isn't helping the decision process.

DS's prep school think that Winchester would be a great fit, but find it difficult to give an opinion on St. Paul's because it isn't a common destination for their leavers. DS is worried that Winchester will be full of intense intellectual types who won't like to do "ordinary" things like football or Warhammer (despite knowing older boys from his prep school who have gone to Winchester who aren't like this at all!).

St. Paul's seems to have a pushier, more "corporate" vibe, and I have heard that sporting prowess is a big factor in determining social pecking order. I worry that DS, as a middling sportsman and quieter personality, will get lost in the crowd.

DS doesn't have a clear preference for day vs boarding. Fees at both are just about manageable but a big stretch.; I get the impression that socially this would matter more at St. Paul's than Winchester, but happy to be corrected on that.

If any parents with experience of either school would be willing to share their insights, I'd be very grateful. Really stuck for a decision at the moment!

Hopeful bump, especially for any parents with experience of St. Paul's School.

Both are academic schools but the biggest difference is that one is full boarding and the other is a day school. Have you considered if you want your DS to board?

Yiyur2615, DS doesn't have a clear preference for day vs boarding. He seems happy to do either as long as the school is the right fit (he does board at his current school so has some idea what is involved, though senior school would be a different experience).

@Montmajour my DS chose SPS for the fact that (1) he wanted to be around people who would inspire him academically and there seem to be a bias towards sciences versus humanities, (2) it was a day school and he was very adamant that he does not want to board (not to mention we are rather relieved as boarding will add to our expenses) (3) it had a 5-day week, (4) it has bright modern buildings. The other schools we shortlisted had beautiful old buildings (other than Sevenoaks which we also visited) but that was not what he liked. For example, he visited Westminster School and was quite determined he didn’t like it. Your DS’ considerations might be different. Both are big schools so I believe in both schools, he will be able to find a group of friends who will bond well with him. And I think both are similarly academic. So I think his main consideration should be whether he wants to board, assuming like you say, the fees are not a big consideration.

“DS is worried that Winchester will be full of intense intellectual types who won't like to do "ordinary" things like football or Warhammer“.

Winchester is not like that… he sounds a great fit for Winchester if he would like to board. It can be more laid back boarding, because there is far less interference from pushy parents. However, are the boarding fees not much more expensive?

I have friends who teach at both schools and friends who have children there. Both great schools.
I do think you have to think about London day school life and where he will be happier both in the short and long term. A Sixth Former is quite different from a 13 year old and it can be hard to predict how they will turn out.

My nephew also greatly disliked the atmosphere at Westminster but liked St Paul’s, Winchester and Eton (which I thought strange at the time but it does make sense, Westminster has a very academic atmosphere and we didn’t get that at Winchester from the boys themselves). In the end, he went to Eton because he is quite driven and competitive and wanted boarding and those special friendships which come with boarding. He is quietish but alpha in that he needs competition to avoid coasting. I think you will get that at all the schools so poster above are right, it is really down to boarding or not and nice genteel life in Winchester/more old fashioned feel vs London modern buzzing day school.

Thankyou, Yiyur2615 and Abuildingwith4wallsandtmrinsid, very helpful perspectives.

Interesting about Westminster - we didn't like it either when we toured, though I have friends whose children are extremely happy there.

it is really down to boarding or not and nice genteel life in Winchester/more old fashioned feel vs London modern buzzing day school
This is a key part of the dilemma, and it's really difficult to compare such different schools. DS was initially drawn towards the old-fashioned feel of Winchester, but I think now might be leaning more towards modern and buzzing. We have plans to visit both schools again, and hopefully that will give us more of a steer in one direction or the other.

I was at Wincoll nearly 20 years ago (dads are allowed on Mumsnet right?) so certain things may have changed since my time. Having spoken to younger old Wykehamists, I think key characteristics of the place are still the same. Winchester was quite a unique place where being respected wasn't really about being good at sport but a lot to do with academic ability as well. So if you were the top scholar or in the A set for many subjects, people would respect you even if you didn't play any sport.

Outside of the 2 hours of homework time each evening (=toytime), we were free to do most things. This gave a lot of free time, maybe too much free time if you didn't play sports. Most would play in house teams which were pretty easy to get into. So don't worry about sports, most people did play something. A popular activity during breaks would be playing football or a variation of winkies (=Wincoll football) in the yard at the house. All were welcome to join, many kids were not that sporty so it never got too competitive. Some people chose to read books and listen to music in their spare time and that was OK too.

There were some weirder kids but most weren't that weird. Maybe we were less normal than most but normal means average and who wants to be average? Main thing was we treated others relatively decently, even though some were on the autism spectrum. Serious bullying wasn't tolerated by the school (or by the boys).

I think the workload at St Paul's might be more and people would be encouraged to work hard. Personally, I think that's a good thing. If there's a big downside to Wincoll, I would say the atmosphese did encourage you to develop a bad work ethic.. The less work you did, the cooler you were to your peers. Doing lots of work in your free time was viewed as not cool. Of course it was only cool if you could then answer all the questions in class and ace the exams. The aim was effortless high achievement. That led to many people developing a bad habit of doing the bare minimum at the last minute. It can take years of conscious effort to get rid of this.

If you're looking for somewhere academic then Winchester would be a decent choice. He may become quite a non conformist but that's not such a bad thing. The sixth form is turning coed so maybe some of the quirkiness will be less pronounced when there are more girls around.