Did you choose LU over GL and SPGS for sporty DD?

[Alexia234]

Would love to get in contact if you chose LU over the 2 Hammersmith girls schools for a sporty DD. My DD got all 3 and we really loved LU for her but having second thoughts when other 2 Schools thrown into the mix and Concerned the sports isn’t as strong for girls in latymer and that dreaded great western road with the pollution . Any parents out there who wouldn’t mind me PMing them?

Calm down ladies and gentlemen! I think everybody needs to attend some PSHE and well-being lessons.

Every year, parents get surprised how their clever child gets an offer from SPGS and this puts them in a dilemma. Similarly, other parents are baffled how their likely similar bright child does not get an offer – yet, has offers from comparably top-notch schools like G&L, LU, NLCS, CLSG and SHHS (South Hamspstead). Parents wonder about the pressurised environment in these schools.

Every year, SPGS parents are fast in discrediting hearsays and second hand information; the disputing comes so quickly … so quickly. But I do not want my child to be called ‘sad’ or be mocked if she does not get an offer. I also would not want to be questioned why I am reconsidering another school if my child has an offer. If you look at the leavers destinations of some of the prep schools, kids will have multiple offers and a few decline SPGS (and the other schools as well). Nonetheless, those I know who are at SPGS are happy and thriving.

Year on year, there are threads asking about the co-ed nature of LU and how girls may grow up faster than when in single-sex environment, and all those negative things you hear in mainstream media. Still, a full cohort enter the school each year. Similarly, other threads ask about the pastoral care at G&L. Similarly, those I know who are at LU and G&L are happy and thriving.

Having experiences with these schools, some are more relaxed than others. However, I reckon that much of the pressure comes from the girls (and parents) themselves. When we used to visit schools, I normally ask students if they are happy and what challenges they are encountering. Some girls have to travel more than 1 hour using public transportation just to attend one of these schools. A few girls transferred from one school to another at Year 8/9, just because of the lack of pastoral care in their previous schools. Eating disorder was an issue in a particular school – but this happens in many schools. More recently with the lockdowns, a few girls had challenges engaging in online learning and the school had to intervene.

I hope the stresses of 11+ (and covid, league tables and their parents) do not seriously permeate into the general wellbeing of these smart girls.

@Glaciferous I think you have lost any moral high ground you possessed by attacking Grandjany's daughter. Decidedly not a good advertisement for Paulinas. Why can't you accept that Grandjany simply has had a different experience to you, and is talking about what she and her contacts know? There doesn't need to be any lying involved.

(And I have no daughter-horse in this race; I only skim the Education boards because I find the topic interesting in general. I know numerous Old Paulinas socially, and I don't think many of them would stoop to picking on a child for not being admitted to the school.)

@TheWindsorKnot Nobody is saying that people shouldn't choose another school. No SPGS parents bothered to comment until Grandjany started telling fibs and peddling the same tired stereotypes that we all know are just that. We are sick of it.

@Innocenta I can't see where I've said that not being admitted to the school is in any way a detriment to Grandjany's kid. Or where I've attacked the child. A questions as to whether her child not getting anywhere with St Paul's is related to her obvious problem with the school isn't an attack on the child, strangely enough. It's interesting that you see it that way though!

And yes, there absolutely is lying going on, even if she's only lying to herself with ludicrous statements like 'I chatted to a mother at G&L and she said there was no bitching or cliques. She said the alpha females went to SPGS.' We all know no school on God's green earth can guarantee no bad behaviour from any of its students and that there is good and bad behaviour at every school on the planet. The idea that every 'alpha female' is just straight up funnelled through to St Paul's so they can all go off and play the Hunger Games together until there's a winner is bonkers.

The thing about weighing food is a straight up lie, though, and one moment of thought would have led her to realise that it cannot possibly be true.

[quote Innocenta]@Glaciferous I think you have lost any moral high ground you possessed by attacking Grandjany's daughter. Decidedly not a good advertisement for Paulinas. Why can't you accept that Grandjany simply has had a different experience to you, and is talking about what she and her contacts know? There doesn't need to be any lying involved.

(And I have no daughter-horse in this race; I only skim the Education boards because I find the topic interesting in general. I know numerous Old Paulinas socially, and I don't think many of them would stoop to picking on a child for not being admitted to the school.) [/quote]
@innocenta

I commented to one of @Grandjany comments, to be fair they are all gossipy and nonsense, I don't think @glaciferous attacked anyone's daughter, it's clear (to me anyway) that @grandjany is stirring things up with lies and gossip about SPGS after posting their DD didn't get in- and got called out. That's not on. OP doesn't help by mentioning gossipy nonsense herself in some of her posts.

From what I see @grandjany hasn't got a DD at any of the schools (I may be wrong) but seems to offer lots of advice about the three of them...

Oh, @Glaciferous - you brought it up, with convenient citation, to put down her child. Perhaps you feel that me describing that as an attack is too strongly worded: fair enough. But making any rebarbative allusion to a child not gaining admission (even couching it in terms that fly under the radar of talk guidelines) is so unnecessary, I think.

Fwiw, I was (silently) on the SPGS side when reading this thread until the recent turn things have taken.

See, this is what we are struggling with here when a statement of fact appears to be taken as an attack. Nobody would say this in the context of other schools. I'm quite sure Grandjany's child will do just fine wherever she goes. This doesn't mean I'm OK with Grandjany posting unpleasant nonsense about a school she has absolutely no direct experience of with no context as to why she might be doing that.

This is riveting!!!

Sorry. I feel a bit like that XKCD cartoon now but actually there is a point worth sticking up for here which is that just because this is the internet, it doesn't mean you can just go around telling lies for no good reason.

These kind of attacks and attitude have made mumsnet becomes sad!

Morning, everyone. We've had to delete a few personal attacks on this thread and we'd really like to get it back on track as it's rather unfair on the OP. Can we draw a line under all this now and just get back to answering the OP's original question?

Thanks

So.
Back to the hockey?
Is it a better sport than lacrosse?

The same lazy cliches about all these schools are peddled every year

@ForeverbyJudyBlume

The same lazy cliches about all these schools are peddled every year

I know. I don't know why it annoys me so much. You'd think I'd be used to it by now.

Re lacrosse, it is a genuinely AWFUL game and I would recommend avoiding it where possible. Luckily, they only have to do a couple of years of it these days at SPGS. I had to suffer five.

I have a daughter in the middle school at G&L and a son in the lower school at Latymer. DD has been incredibly happy at G&L. She is a quiet, bookish child who has come out of her shell there. Pastoral care has been amazing, especially during covid. There is a real emphasis on well being which is reflected in PSHE lessons and general support from form tutors as well as in parent webinars with mental health professionals. DD is sporty (Middlesex and club netball) and the sport is to a high standard. Sports facilities on site are exceptional. DD has made a solid group of friends. Certainly there is a lot of wealth at the school - eg emails from school reminding drivers not to park on zigzag lines outside the school gates. This isn’t limited to G&L, perhaps it’s just more visible than at other schools? DD chose G&L because she wanted the IB option, loved the sports facilities and preferred an all girls school. She never considered applying to Latymer, it being co-ed, nor SPGS, as she thought it had a very different vibe from G&L, granted this was based on a one-off open day experience at SPGS. Alternatively, DS preferred a co-ed school, coming from a small boys primary, and Latymer was the only real choice (Highgate not being a realistic option commute wise). To me, Latymer feels like a boys school that now excepts girls. The girls I know have fairly strong personalities, not at all like my own DD. DS is outgoing, confident and independent which suits him well at a school of Latymer’s size. Sports, aside from swimming, are mostly played off site at the grounds near Westfield. This should be a consideration for Saturday morning logistics and commute. DS is dyslexic and the learning support has been fantastic. Overall, Latymer is great for our DS but wouldn’t have worked for our DD. Hopefully the offers holders day will make the choice clearer. You have 3 great schools so you can’t go wrong. Good luck!

I have two dd at LU, it doesn't feel like a boys' school with girls tacked on to me - it feels like a truly co-ed school. One of the things I love about it is my dd are not remotely intimidated or impressed by boys and hold their own with them as equals. I'd agree the stuff about the school being "street" is nonsense (and I'm sure not all girls at SPGS are neurotic and driven), it's an expensive school in a wealthy part of London - but it does have a significant amount of bursary holders in the sixth form, some from very challenging backgrounds ie refugees, single parent families on benefits etc, and I think it has done my elder dd a HUGE amount of good to get to know them and learn about their lives.

Sportswise, my dds hated hockey (both given it up now), so I can't report but they have friends who have thrived on the teams and others who have done brilliantly at rowing/netball/swimming - opportunities are certainly there in spades. Academically i find the school extremely impressive and the pastoral care has been excellent. However, I'm not going to diss other schools or repeat what I'm sure are also fiction about them - I'm sure they're all fantastic too and OP is lucky to have a choice where she can't really go wrong.

@Grandjany

Hi Alexia234

In your interest and because some of my comments have been skewed by others, I wanted to add that SPGS is a fabulous school with excellent teaching. It is, however, as many well informed heads will tell you, a higher risk option than LU or G&L, the reason being it is a highly selective school for a very driven scholarly type of child. If you never have to nag about homework, and your child is independently driven you should have few issues there. If your child has any nervous issue’s whatsoever (such as tummy aches because of nerves) you should be wary. There is a reason that they weigh the children’s food at lunchtime and a reason for some attrition at 13+; it is not uncommon. The school selects very sensibly and carefully but occasionally with error and obviously moving schools again if it doesn’t work out can be stressful.

I've only just seen this and it's complete rubbish (my polite reply)! They don't weigh the food and a couple of students leave, but from our experience, only because they move cities or countries. My daughter's year had a couple and they all moved out of London with their families. 2 of the new girls appear to have been offered places at 11+, went to other schools and then asked to reapply.

@Grandjany

Hi Alexia234

In your interest and because some of my comments have been skewed by others, I wanted to add that SPGS is a fabulous school with excellent teaching. It is, however, as many well informed heads will tell you, a higher risk option than LU or G&L, the reason being it is a highly selective school for a very driven scholarly type of child. If you never have to nag about homework, and your child is independently driven you should have few issues there. If your child has any nervous issue’s whatsoever (such as tummy aches because of nerves) you should be wary. There is a reason that they weigh the children’s food at lunchtime and a reason for some attrition at 13+; it is not uncommon. The school selects very sensibly and carefully but occasionally with error and obviously moving schools again if it doesn’t work out can be stressful.

SPGS weighs all of the children's food at lunch?

No. They don’t weigh the food at lunch. I asked dd1, and she looked at me blankly and asked how on earth that would work.
Also said that if they did, she wouldn’t be able to sneak thirds of pudding, on occasion .

My daughter just laughed at the weighing food. They encourage them to have seconds and they do. Stop listening to stupid malicious gossip. Complete rubbish!

Of course they don't weigh the food at lunch!

Think about it for a minute. How on earth would you coordinate that for 800 children or however many it is in an hour or so at lunchtime? It's quite plainly completely unworkable and also quite obviously just not anything ANY school would do.

The only thing that is remotely interesting about the food at SPGS is that it is really really good according to my daughter.

Calling a wealthy school like LU "Street" is simply absurd. Just because it might not be as posh as St Paul's or Godolphin does not make it street.

Is it possible this rumour stems from a singular girl weighing her own food (i.e. calorie counting)? There's no way the school is doing that.

It may be an adjustment for one child with an eating disorder or other condition that has caught the attention of peers. It isn't necessarily made up out of whole cloth - something like that is likely to seem 'strange' to other children.