I really, really want dd to join an after school maths club, but I can't convince her.

[MaureenMLovesmincepies]

Here's the thing. She's in year 7 and she's good at maths. She's in a school which caters for both selective and non selective children and although she didn't get a selective place, she has been put in the shaddow grammar class and has a very real chance of moving into the grammar stream in year 8. One of the main reasons is because her maths is good. They are streamed for maths already and she's in the top set. However, she doesn't like doing maths! Her primary teachers and her new teacher can't understand why, because she's good at it. They both say/have said, its a confidence thing. Her form tutor has 'suggested' that one of the things that would help to ensure a place in the grammar stream next year, is if she is seen to take part in extra curricular activities and not just the fun sporty ones. Hint, hint!

What do I do, should I just leave it? The last thing I want is for her to be labeled the 'geek' because I know that's what she's thinking. None of her friends are doing it. She's still only new at this school and I don't want to spoil friendships for her. I'm sure the maths club will be fun learning, not like extra lessons because you can't do maths. I just think it will give her the confidence to do it.

God, I hate being the grown up sometimes!

Do you know any details of what they do? At my dcs school it's 'maths in motion' run by Jaguar cars and it's supposed to be good fun, so if it is that you could tell her it will be much less dull than 'maths club' sounds. To be honest though, unless you can find a friend to go with her I reckon you're fighting a losing battle.

She sounds a lot like my dd.

She is very good at maths but lacks confidence in her ability.

Teachers have been saying this for years.

SHe did maths gcse last year a yr early and got an A ,so she was very pleased.

She's now complaining that she's finding As level too difficult but her tutor says she's panicking unnecessarily because of her lack of confidence.

I have decided to get a tutor to help her gain the vital confidence to help her with exams.

People will probably think I'm a pushy mum for doing it but I think it will enable dd to flourish in a subject she is naturally good at.

So my recommendation is to get some help for her to gain confidence.

Saying that it is nigh on impossible to get them to do something if they deem it uncool at this stage.
Good LUck

I have a feeling they do things like puzzle solving. She's got maths tomorrow and she has said she'll ask her teacher, since she runs the club. We've both suggested to her that she just gives it a go. If its really bad, I won't force her. You're right though, she'll probably not go! Such a shame, that she can do it, but doesn't enjoy it. You can't tell a 12 year old that she'll benefit from it though, can you? Lets face it, the only thing that will drag her there, is McFly atm! Ho hum.

She can tell her mates her mum makes her do it - give her a cop out.

Nice one ggirl! A grade A, a year early. I bet you were beaming for days!

yes I was very proud

It is difficult to get your DCs to join after school clubs that may not be considered cool. However, the best way to succeed in Maths is to practise, practise, practise.

And dd would say. Yeah, whatever!

If she doesn't like maths then I don't see the point in going to a maths club.

Not everyone who is good at maths actually likes the subject. It's not necessarily a matter of confidence.

Does she actually want to be in the grammar stream? If so, that could be used as an argument in favour of joining the maths club.

Otherwise I'd go for encouraging her to try it once, and allowing her to stop if she doesn't like it.

My DS1 had a choice last year between lunchtime cricket and a maths club, and chose the cricket despite having rather more talent for maths. I didn't even try to persuade him, and nor (to their credit) did the school.

She does want to be in the grammar stream, but that maybe because she thinks I want her there! I don't put any pressure on her what so ever, but you can't help but want the best for them, can you? Its not a guarantee that she will go into the grammar stream, but on the other hand, the teacher has suggested that her & her new 3 friends are the ones he think have a very good chance. What I don't want is for her to continue to loose confidence as the work obviously gets harder and her friends to move up without her. Of course, on the other hand what if she does go up and her friends don't, because she has done the work! We need to have another chat I think!

I won't push her, maybe I'll find website at home, that might help her instead.

DD1 is good at maths. They have an after school club which is called the maths homework club and I thought it sounded like a great idea because it is an opportunity for her to do her maths homework, surrounded by school resources and with a maths teacher present to help if she is stuck. I suggested it to her and she replied "and why would I want to do that?"

I'm sure it comes down to just not being the cool thing to be seen to be doing. She is very conscientious about homework, but she doesn't want to be seen to be!

I have bought her a copy of the text book they use at school (they are not allowed to bring the school ones home) and she uses websites too.

ggirl -
I was exactly like your dd but I did actually like maths.
Tell her from me that A-Level is a bit of a nightmare after GCSE's(it was o-levels for me) but it gets better.I got 14% in my first test at A-Level (my Mum & Dad went loopy!!) and then I ended up getting a B eventually (I'll always regret not working hard enough to get the A).
Anyway, Now I'm doing a maths dgree with the OU and I love it. You're not being a pushy parent, you're just doing what you think is right - your daughter will thank you in the end.

oh god yes, dion't make her do something where she's just going to get ribbed for being the teacher's pet. Don't do that.