Year 8 daughters behaviour at school is awful

[Knackerednursey]

Where do I stand regarding getting my daughter moved to another class to get her away from bad influences in her class? She is bright, was put in the top class in year 7, and has never been one bit of bother behaviour wise. She’s always been a really good girl. All through year 7 she did really well, settled into comprehensive fine. Now in year 8, her school has adopted a new policy of mixed ability class groups, so she has been with a completely different set of kids. Right from the start in September her behaviour changed, late to class often, not following rules and not listening. I get messages from school several times a week through another new system they’ve put in place this year. By all accounts the class she’s in is one of the worst for behaviour in the year. I’ve tried everything I can at home, and there have been some improvements but not nearly enough. The girls she spends time with have even worse behaviour, but I can’t control who she is friends with at school. I’m really worried her education is going to go down the drain the way it’s going, and I think she’d benefit from a move into a well behaved class. Has anyone dealt with something like this?

Could you move her schools?

Honestly? Pull her out of the school and start again. That’s what I would do. If not, request that’s he is moved, monitor from hone on reports and use sanctions for poor behaviour.

Every parents assumes it’s the other children who are the bad influence, and not their own badly behaved child.

Have you tried talking to her about why she behaves badly at school? How is her behaviour at home? Any problems at home?

Will she be with this class next year? If not, or if she'll start GCSE options next year, I'll just ride it out.
Only other thing to do is to raise with her tutor/head of year/whoever it is at your school.

I also think you need to speak to your daughter seriously. Your post blames her behaviour on everyone else, but it's not that uncommon for children who were angels in primary school to change dramatically in Year 8. This doesn't sound like a case of she can't work because everyone in the class is disruptive. It sounds like she is one of the disruptive ones. She can't control everyone else's behaviour, but she can control her own. The school is also more likely to be sympathetic if they know she is not one of the students actually causing the problem.

So from my experience with schools (my own children are in primary), Y8 and Y9 girls have always come up in behaviour reports. It's partly her age and development, which is not helped by the company she is keeping.

Either you move her or you put in a lot of work in teaching her to make ether own decision regardless of what others do. Maybe give her a chance? Establish some dos and don'ts, reward her etc. Also look at her joining things out of school with a better crowd.

Definitely speak to Head of Year/ Pastoral lead and let them know you want to work with them. If she's a frequent "offender" the school should want to put some measures in place to interrupt this pattern of behaviour. Some schools will mix up the classes each year to break these unhealthy dynamics. It could also be that she is unhappy and desperately trying to fit in or impress these new "friends"

It's quite likely that last year she was in a top set but this year, due to Covid, she is being taught as part of her tutor group. That is the case in my school. Normally my y8 tutor group would be split up for some subjects but other than for MFL where they have 3 different options, they are all taught together this year. My group is quite literally fed up with it all. The good kids are sick of the naughty ones. They need to be mixed up, and the sooner the better. I suspect the OP's DD is finding something similar.

I have told my lot that if there are any extra behaviour points this week, their seating plan for the remainder of the term will be done by me and non-negotiable and I will actively break up friendship groups as I am fed up of silly misdemeanours. None of them is what could be termed a serious offence e.g. bullying, but not handing work in on time, messing around with their laptop etc, all things that I know they can easily sort but some are making poor choices. I only see them 3x per week as I'm p/t so I'm waiting to see what tomorrow brings.

My heart goes out to you as we are in the same situation. Y8 DD completely unrecognisable. I know part of it is hormones and I'm not expecting it to be plain sailing but it is getting to be beyond a joke.
I ended up writing an email to her head of year outlining my concerns and she has now been moved. Within the last 3 weeks, I've had zero phone calls home.
I know people will say it's your daughter that's the problem, and she is at fault for behaving that way, but the pressure to conform is real and positive role models are hard to come by in some classes. Please request to move her and make it clear that you are considering moving schools as the bahaviour management is clearly lacking.