Extra curricular at Surbiton High School

[Mycatslovedreamies]

Hi - we are considering Surbiton High School for DD (assuming she is offered a place) and absolutely loved it when we visited last year pre-Covid. DD is above average academically and a really likes to get involved in a large number of activities. She is in all the “a” teams at her small prep school and plays hockey and cricket at club level. She also loves drama and dance and has numerous grades in ballet, Lamda and musical theatre. At first I thought surbiton was the perfect school because they offer so many of the things she loves to do but a few people have warned me that unless you are at the “top” of your game (I.e. playing a sport for your county) then it’s very hard to get involved in anything. If I’m honest, I don’t she she is “exceptional” at any of the things she loves to do but I thought the whole point was being able to participate whatever your level? Can anyone who has DDs at this school tell me what it’s really like?....and is this just what it’s like at senior schools in general?

Same for all senior schools. Wherever you go you have to accept there will be more girls and therefore not everyone will be able to get into A team. A girl at DD's primary was top of cross country but when she got to borough level she came 40 out of 200. She was devastated. I'd suggest nurturing self-esteem that comes from an internal basis, not just self-esteem based on a yardstick from external success, always measuring yourself against others. There will always be someone who is better than you but you can do these things for a sense of personal accomplishment, not always to be number one? It's something every child has to face at some point. It's even worse if you have a DS as boys/men are even more competitive and stake their self-worth even more on winning.

That said, Surbiton HS from what I've heard has very good sports (they got an award last year or the year before?) and have heard there is even an H team for netball so sounds like they like to include as many as possible in a team if they can.

I don't know about plays etc but again from hearsay the performance they put on at Wimbledon Theatre every year (though not this year of course) is said to be absolutely outstanding. Not sure how parts are allocated, maybe someone else can help.

Everyone I know with a DD there seems overall very happy with the place. If you can, go to a virtual open day and ask your questions there.

My DD has been at Surbiton for four years, is very sporty (seven days a week - now down to two sports) and has had ample opportunities there to play for the school. While there are definitely county standard (and higher) girls there in most sports (eg, hockey, tennis, gymnastics) there are still plenty of chances for girls to play a lot of good quality sports. My daughter has played for the A team in one sport and B in another. She is decent but she isn’t national or even county standard. There are multiple teams in most sports and if you are playing for the SHS B or C team you are often playing another school’s A team. If your daughter is sporty, there is a very good chance she will really enjoy SHS and find plenty of chances to play for the school.

I have dd’s at SHS and am increasingly disillusioned with it. Academically it’s good, but the extra opportunities are for the elites who have been coached outside of the school but school take the credit. The opportunities hugely decrease as your child goes through the school with few teams higher up. There is much less in reality than at other schools, for example tennis which doesn’t really exist except for scholars. Drama is good but again so many girls, coached from a young age it’s nigh on impossible to get a part. You are very much a number at the school. I am not alone in this opinion, nearly 50 left this year rather than joining the sixth form and have not been replaced, and that’s with Covid allowing all to go through regardless of grades.

@fauconberg Interesting to hear another opinion. Were the 50 leaving a big reduction compared to the year before? How many usually leave? Where did the 50 all go? A lot leave at 6th form, places like WHS and PHS have this problem - especially if they've been there since the age of 4, which often half have. They want to try something new - and often - with boys!

The only other thing, isn't it normal for there to be a reduction in extra curricula activities as you go higher in any school - as they focus more and more on schoolwork for exams?

Do you feel it is different at other schools, possibly its size is against it?

@fauconberg - wow that’s a lot leaving. I had also heard of girls leaving because of the lack of extracurricular activities and choosing to go to places like Reeds/st Johns/Epsom, sometimes in year 9 as well as after GCSEs. The brochure does make it look like there is so much on offer but if they are just creaming off the top talent then where does they leave the girls who don’t make the cut. Playing sports matches internally is one thing but it’s not quite same as having a match with another school and feeling part of a proper team? I would be interested in knowing if this is particularly problematic at surbiton because of its size and lack of space/facilities or if it is just the “norm” for all the girls schools like GHS, LEH, WHS etc