Advice needed - mental health problem in GCSE year

[QGMum]

I’m looking for some advice on how to interact with my dad’s school regarding her mental health. She has been diagnosed with depression and anxiety and is seeing a therapist, but not on medication.

Despite this she is still doing well at school (year 11 so GCSE year) although her motivation and performance has dropped in one subject she was previously very good at and engaged with. I’ve told the school she is depressed and anxious. Since then they email me when there is an issue, like her seeming tired in class or being upset, describing the issue and say do let us know if there is anything we can do to support her. It’s good that they let me know but am I being unreasonable to think that perhaps they could come up with some ideas? I have no idea other than to tell them to back off having a go at her for academic performance and just be kind to her. The school is a small, private all girls day school, not overly academic but they like to get the best out of their girls. Any advice? I have no previous experience of mental health illness and feel completely out of my depth.

I do appreciate that teachers are not mental health specialists either.

My dd won’t discuss with me what happens at school or how she’s feeling.

Sorry for rambling a bit and thanks for reading if you got this far.

Hi Op

No real advice from me because I have been through similar and ended up withdrawing my DD from the school after I realised her anxiety would be relieved by doing so. I found ours to be rather keen on ringing me to report that DD needed "support" (undefined) which I should arrange. But that was about it and I never really found a way to work with them.

In practical terms I wonder if you should have a meeting with your DD's therapist. They won't be able to tell you anything confidential but still might be able to give some pointers.

Does your DD like her school? If not, have you given her the option of leaving, after GCSEs at least? It may help, assuming school is the source of some of her anxiety.

@Polly99 Thank you so much for your reply. It seems like I need to work out the support needed for myself. Fortunately, she does like her school and is looking forward to joining the sixth form there. The option to leave has always been there for her but she prefers to stay.

I will follow up on your suggestion to speak to the therapist for pointers.

Hope your dd is doing better now.