X Box Usage in the week for a 12 year old boy

[Crouchendmumoftwo]

Hello,
Just to give you a bit of background. I am the parent of a 12 year old bright boy who does his work in the morning until lunchtime and then goes on his X Box to play with his friends or goes to play tennis or have a kick around in the park. In the evenings he plays with his friends on the X Box chatting away. I have told him to be off at 10.00am he then pleads to stay on until 10.30 and invariably I have to turn the wifi off which leads to him getting cross and stomping around angrily and we have a row etc. I think 10.30am is far too late but in this unusual lock down period I have been a bit lax and he has a lot of fun playing with his friends so I'm of the mindset he is happy and having fun so that is great. But, it goes on later and there are always arguments about him coming off and it is stressing me out and he wont go to bed as he remains angry. I wondered what other parents/carers limits are and how they controlled it and any subsequent bad behaviour. Thanks for any advice, it's really appreciated.

Prepare in advance of the situation.

So explain earlier on in the day that his behaviour is upsetting to you and that you don't want to have a nightly quarrel. He has school the next morning and he's very lucky to be allowed all that time on the computer.

Ask him to understand more about taking responsibility for his own health and sleep - that you aren't there to do it all for him!

It sounds like a lot of time on the screen. I'd suggest saying he can play only until 9pm and then read until 10pm.

10:30pm playing games into the night at 12 years old sounds like a recipe for disaster. By then he'll be hyped up from being on even longer and tired too. Far more likely up for a fight and less able to restrain his emotions and see reason.

Boundaries are there for a reason. They are there to keep him healthy and also protect him from himself. He's only 12. Help him learn healthy sleep habits and healthy gaming time.

Offer 10pm ONLY on weekends but during the week 9pm.

Does he want to be playing until ten thirty because that’s when his friends are playing until? I agree completely that ten thirty is really late in normal times.

I think at the moment it’s very difficult to have the rules that we would usually have. If that’s how his group of friends are spending time together then you need to take that into consideration. Rather than a time he finishes, might it work better to have a number of hours he’s allowed on so he needs to go on much later in the day. I think it’s a good idea to talk with him about it beforehand.

He’s still doing g his school work and he’s going out too so I think what he’s doing is ok. As long as he knows it’s not going to Be like this forever.

These are really useful replies so thank you very much, really helpful.