Any experience of Winchester College or Sherborne school?

[Smulen]

Don’t shoot me down here as I know there’s a LOT going on in the world right now but... DS is in year 4 and next year we have to think seriously about secondary schools. We’re currently in the state system and don’t currently know anybody with children at either of these schools. Would be very grateful for your views if you have them - the good, the bad and the ugly.

[Parsley1234]

Terrible bullying at Sherborne over the last few years pretty endemic across the year groups. Children have been removed from the school due to lack of pastoral care

[Panicmode1]

Shocking that bullying is STILL an issue at Sherborne. I knew several boys who were mercilessly bullied there in the late 80s when I was at a nearby boarding school which used to have dances with the Sherborne boys.....

[Smulen]

Thankyou Parsley1234, do you know anything about other schools in that neck of the woods?

[Parsley1234]

The school with good pastoral care is nearby but I can’t remember the name ! Let me think the woman I met at a match whose child was mercilessly bullied at Sherborne had jumped ship there. He was not the only child I had heard was bullied there my friend sent her son there and I have been less than impressed

[mateysmum]

I have a friend whose son was at Sherborne, left last year.

I get the impression that it is a VERY traditional school which is focussed on boarding. Are you looking at day or boarding? What area does your "neck of the woods" cover?

Day pupils are expected to stay till pretty late in the evening and have little home life. Fees are pretty high, but if you're also looking at Winchester then looks like that's not an issue for you.

My friend had a lot of "debates" with the school about how they supported her son whenever he didn't wan't to pursue life in the way the school thought he should, even though he is a bright and sporty boy.

But of course others will say it's an excellent school.

[TheCatsHouse]

@Parsley1234 would that be Clayesmore that they moved to?

[Parsley1234]

No they went to Kings Bruton I was completely wrong. Good luck with what you choose

[Greenfinch50]

Hi, my DS has several friends at Sherborne and a couple at Winchester. Sherborne attracts families who want old school name, traditional. I can confirm bullying is an issue. One of his friends left and one changed house after a lot of fuss. Winchester took two bright academic boys from his prep, it is a bit tired from a facilities point of view but they are still there and doing well. Best advice I can give is visit the schools you are interested in and go with where you feel comfortable, an hour away is my limit.

As regards coming from state, the days are much longer and school on Saturday, lots of sport (to suit all sorts, not just rugby). Even if the child is day they will be expected to stay in for prep until late evening. Best of luck.

[PerditaProvokesEnmity]

I don't know Sherborne at all. I know Winchester a little (we considered it, and know several former and current pupils). Extrapolating from close observation of life at a similar school, I'd say both the child's and their parents' experience will be wholly shaped by the character of the house and the housemaster they end up with.

Which makes it horribly difficult to consider as far in advance as the process determines. Almost inevitably the house leadership will change either before or during your child's time there - which can lead to a fundamental reversal in their enjoyment of school.

Setting that aside, although I found some areas rather cramped and tired looking, Winchester seemed, on the whole, gloriously civilised - and somewhere this middle aged female would have loved to spend her formative years. (The family child preferred a brasher alternative.)

Obviously at this stage you won't know if your son is cut out for boarding at senior level. If he is, but would prefer some escape from ever present people, the school over the bridge from Windsor - where they all have their own rooms - might be a better fit.

[Smulen]

Thank you everyone your comments have been really helpful. We currently live in Kent and are planning a move to Dorset in a few years time. Sherborne seemed geographically right so I’m very grateful for the warnings. It’s difficult to see schools with Covid restrictions. Although only 8 my son actually wants to be in a dorm but that’s probably due to his love of Harry Potter . He’s bright and needs somewhere more academic than his current school but now I’m at a bit of a loss. Winchester is a bit of a long shot as I know how hard it is to get a place. Any schools you’d recommend? We need somewhere boarding with 1 1/2 hours from West Dorset which has good pastoral care and is academic (he’s not sporty but enjoys cricket).

[PerditaProvokesEnmity]

I'm sure you're aware (but just in case you are not) that there are an infinite number of threads here on Winchester - and comparisons to other schools?

[mateysmum]

If you're looking at West Dorset then you have quite a lot of choices. Dauntsey.'s in Wiltshire, King's Bruton, the various Taunton and Wellington schools, Milfield even Blundell's at Tiverton. There are probably more. Have you checked out the Good Schools Guide?

[Greenfinch50]

Canford? Co-Ed, good exam results.

[Smulen]

PerditaProvokesEnmity, greatly appreciate your help. We’re pretty much set on applying to Winchester but need to apply elsewhere as there’s every likelihood he won’t get in. I’ll have a look at the threads though. He’s not ready for boarding school yet so I don’t think places like Horris Hill would work at the moment.
Mateysmum, thank you. I looked at the good schools guide at Millfield and Bryanston but they seem REALLY sporty. I’ll have a look at your suggestions.

[mateysmum]

I don't know Bryanston but yes Millfield is very sporty. I went there for an equestrian evening recently and the horsey facilities were gobsmacking.

As an aside, my son went to the (short lived)day school for Horris Hill in the early 2000s. HH always struck us as being traditional to the point of old fashioned. Of course it may well have changed since then.

I guess the point is that within 1 1/2 hours of Dorset, there is plenty of choice. Depending on where you end up living, within 2 hrs, you could reach schools such as Radley (know nothing about it)or even Marlborough (approx 11/2 hr drive from Sherborne).

Good luck with your search.

[Mummy195]

OP I came on here a while back to ask about the boarding houses for Sherborne for one of my DS.

I don't know about the bullying. Before we applied I asked some friends and a relative who had or have DC at the school, and this issue was never bought up. Considering DS is soft spoken and academic, I would have thought I would have been pre-warned, and I did directly ask as he is at a day school currently, so it is a concern.

When I asked my question here on MN, I did get DM replies and I have now mentioned your post, hopefully, one of the parents who currently have DC there can give you direct information.

You still have plenty of time if your DS is still only 8, to go back again and again, especially to speak to the Housemasters. Everyone I spoke to said the Headmaster is very encouraging about being kind and would not tolerate bullying behaviour. As a side note, I just wanted to say that Sherborne is one of the very few old top traditional schools to publicly show support for BLM - just something I noted as I saw it as a sign of empathy.

Have you thought of getting your DS to Pilgrims for y6? since they are probably the biggest feeder to Winchester. And I guess it would help if your DS is a chorister too - I don't think its too late to get into various choir programmes at his age.

Good luck.

[Smulen]

Thank you Mummy195 for your post and for mentioning me to your contacts. I’d be very happy to hear from anyone with DC at Sherborne.

[Vaughan32]

Don't write Sherborne off, OP. We know lots of boys there from DS's prep school and all are happy- I honestly think their pastoral care is high priority. That may not always have been the case- it was probably more 'robust' a generation ago but there's much more emphasis on kindness and mutual support today. The Head is one of the best in the country and strongly 'anti-entitlement' and pro-social responsibilty. You have plenty of time to make your choice, and there are lots of options if you move to Dorset. For Winchester you'll need to engage in Y5 to secure a place on a House list, but for almost anywhere else you have a couple more years to research options and see how your DS develops . Good luck with your decisions, OP.

[Darbishire27]

The problem with asking parents about schools is that they (we) are generally over-invested in our own choices, so it can quickly descend into competitive arguing- you'll particularly see this when the question relates to two or more rival or directly comparable schools. The reality is that these leading schools are all excellent in terms of their educational provision, so it really has to boil down to what works and feels right to you and your child, and no one on MN can tell you that. There really is no substitute for personal contact with the school- visits of course, but also converstion with the Headmaster, Houseparents and other staff. I think Admissions teams are also very instructive- do they behave as though they are doing you a favour, or the other way around? Because this could point to whether the school culture places the child first, or the institution. For most of us this is one of the biggest investments we ever make, and any school you consider should be generous with its time and led by you in terms of the time and input you require to understand their school community and whether it suits your DS. Admission should be a process of discernment- it shouldn't necessarily be linear and it's not objective. If feels too much of a set-piece, that limits your view and suggests a lack of respect for you, your child , your decision-making role and choice.

[Wonderwall80]

Agree with Vaughan... we have been really happy with Sherborne and my DS is currently there . I have PM’d you. He is choosing to stay for 6th, and has been super happy with the on-line live lessons during both lockdowns.

They may have ups and downs, but where doesn’t! Committed staff and they do have a handle and deal with issues as they arise from our experience. It helps if you have faith in the HMs.

[SomethingInTheWaySheCooks]

I have a ds at Winchester and he is very happy there. It is an unashamedly academic school, with all sorts of interesting learning taking place. Happy to answer any specifics.

[Hellothere48928492]

Ok so a little bit of advice on Winchester: I went there for three years and then left. I was admitted as a scholar. Was bullied for my entire time there; I developed several mental health problems and it was a complete disaster for me personally. Facilities are rather lacking, but not too bad. Pastoral care is awful, and notoriously so. The master in college is particularly bad and tends to deal with things in an old-fashioned sort of way. Quite academic, but definitely on the decline. Do let me know if there’s anything you want to know, I know better than most.

[Darbishire27]

I'm so sorry you had an awful experience, @Hellothere48928492, particularly having achieved so much in winning Election. I very much hope things are better for you now in whatever you are doing with your undoubted gifts.

[Oscarbravo]

Late to the question but I wanted to confirm the pastoral care is very, very poor at this school to the point that pupils may suffer long term damage.

[Nantucketview]

@Oscarbravo Which of these schools are you referring to? We are considering one for DS.