Whitgift, Trinity or Emanuel?

[IvyLynn]

I would love some help with deciding between these schools as we are in the very fortunate position of being offered 11+ spaces at each for DS. I think all three schools are absolutely brilliant in their own right but am trying to figure out which school DS would have a happier time at.

We need to figure out the mixed V single sex question ourselves. Emanuel would be the much more sensible choice in terms of logistics/journey as we live nearby. So I need to figure out if I think he would have a happier time/different/better experiences at Trinity or Whitgift to make the 50min journey worthwhile.

DS is very keen on Whitgift from the 'feeling" he got at the open day but I think he has made this decision from quite random 10 year old boy observations (think food & wallabies). He is insisting that the journey will be worth it for him for the facilities/extras. He is not particularly good at sport but enjoys having a go at a wide variety and we are hoping he will find 'his thing' or at least have a lot of fun being active and trying different things. He has quite a spikey profile. He can seem reasonably bright in certain subjects/ways and then the complete opposite in others and more confusingly it can flip. Not terribly mature or self driven yet (except on occasion he takes us by surprise). He really knows his own mind, can be very strong willed and stubborn but so far has been utterly opposed to any revision for exams. He can be lazy, easily distracted or fixated if he is interested in something. He's not an alpha, nor a follower, not in the popular set at school but always had a solid group of friends, not particularly musical, loves science, likes maths, great reader and even though normally his maths result has been stronger in the past the school have always said he had a talent for Eng (which apparently came through in 11+ to my surprise).

The biggest question I would love to have answered is in regards to Trinity V Whitgift - I keep hearing that they suit very different boys and that the ethos is quite different. I don't seemed to have grasped this. During the process I really didn't think we would be in this position. DS was very reluctant (understatement) to revise/practice and therefore I didn't want any of us to become too attached to a particular school. Also within the process I unfortunately only got to have a flying visit to Trinity and had a much more indepth tour of the other schools.

How would you describe the different ethos of Trinity V Whitgift? Is there a particular type of boy who you think would not be happy at either school.

I'm keen to make a decision quickly to release places for those who are on the waiting list as I have been on the other side of this situation before (and did get a waitlist place which which has turned out to be a happy and excellent experience for DD).

Don’t they have to travel from Emanuel to sports facilities for lots of sports anyway? So either way some travel time involved, but I appreciate not quite as regularly. The boys I know at all three of these schools socialise in Clapham / Wandsworth - flip out v popular and compared to the Whitgift centre in Croydon I can see why..!

My DS went to Emanuel and did very well there, getting top GCSEs and A levels. Boys from his Prep went to other schools that involved awful journeys, incl. Whitgift and Hampton. In both cases, the Mothers later admitted to me that the journeys were not worth it and their sons grew to loathe the time spent travelling. As it happens, my DS got the best A levels of the 3 of them and had a more enjoyable time, even though theoretically Emanuel is rated ‘‘Lower’ than the others in the London Independent schools pecking order!

Seeline, it’s always done in a supportive way and I feel it is only done to extend the boys and avoid complacency. We love Trinity but to shine you have be exceptional. Just being top at whatever primary you are at doesn’t guarantee an easy ride. It’s to the school’s credit but if you son would find being a small fish in a big pond then maybe not the school for him. My DS has a scholarship offer from Kings college Wimbledon so is quite strong on exams etc but finds a lot of the work at Trinity a stretch which is a good thing. If you are able they push you along.

Allyoudoiscriticize Thanks for all your advice. We seem to be currently leaning between Whitgift & Emanuel. There is a particular niche interest (non academic) of DS which he would be offered exposure to at Whitgift (and to a lesser extent at Trinity) and not Emanuel. He has been quite passionate about it for the past couple of years............but am really not convinced that he will be in 3 years time. We wouldn't be able to offer this to him outside of school. So we are really just weighing up giving him that exposure V the journey time. His DF and himself are pretty much swaying towards Whitgift, so I seem to be the more practical one, largely because I'm the one who will be facilitating his commute/picking up the pieces if it goes wrong.

Champagne I've been looking into the the jouney options/times all morning and we will do some test runs. I'm afraid to bring him back to Whitgift to be honest. I had to drag him out of the place on interview day.

UntamedShrew They do but I believe its not the same drain as the commute.

Jeanne Its interesting to hear the perspective of someone who has been through this and come out the other side. To be honest, I don't have any concerns about Emanuel in terms of academics. Its become so difficult to get into in recent years. I think its results are rising year on year. We actually started this process with Emanuel as our first choice.
We have close family friends with 3 children there, boys and girls, and they all love it and are generally having a happy time with great friends and relationships with their teachers.

If it was just down to academics, we wouldn't even hesitate going with Emanuel. Its the extra space and consequently the wider variety of sports on offer and opportunities which the boys can avail of. I'm just trying to weigh that against the journey. I have definitely taken on board your point about your friends who felt the journey wasn't worth it at the end of their schooling. Its the opportunities V quality of life question?

"Don’t they have to travel from Emanuel to sports facilities for lots of sports anyway?"

Nope Emanuel site is 18 acres (big for central London) and most sport is on-site (everything in the sports hall, fives courts and swimming pool, plus Astro and grass pitches for rugby/cricket, some hockey and hard netball courts. Overspill is at Blagdons (20 mins away) and Barnes, which is also where their boathouse is.

They produce national standard players in sport - notably in rowing. I wouldn't write the school off as non-sporty

My DS is a sports and academic scholar at Whitgift. He is exceptionally quiet but does very well and is respected for being an introvert. At primary I was constantly told he was too quiet.

Contrary to reputation we have not found that sports is shoved down the boys' throats. Natural talent is always identified.

We turned down a Scholarship at Trinity.

My DS came in one sport and given a scholarship for that sport but they have identified that he is good at others too.

There are so many clubs that all personalities, interests are catered for. Many boys from DS's previous school did choose Trinity because of the supposed better pastoral care and rigorous academics.

But I couldn't be happier with the academics. The work is rigorous and the boys are well supported. He is getting very good grades.

I would go with what your DS wants as he'll be the one that needs to be motivated to go there.

@IvyLynn, It's a really difficult decision. Did you visit these schools during a normal 'working day'? We found that to be the deal breaker when we chose T after being offered W and a couple others as well.
You really get a feel of the children and see them in their social groups.
We were initially concerned when we heard that lessons at T are only 35 mins long, but this really seems to work and they have a good range of subjects to choose from
My DH trawled through their websites, sporting fixtures, and social media feeds to gain more insight.
Emanuel was boys only around 20 years ago and produced great sporting talent, especially in rowing as previously mentioned.
We found that in the top sports such as rugby T @ W do particularly well, as there is just a wider talent pool to chose from.
My DS has a friend at W and he said that the best food was laid on for the open days and they don't get food like that on regular days

I'm going to have to disagree on the lunch comment - DS is at Whitgift and boasts about his lunch every day. He is very happy indeed with his lunches.

I agree with the lunch comments at W . My DS has allergies and is a fussy eater but has never complained about the food and leaves home early in the morning so he can have breakfast there

I meant I agree with Walkingtheplank comments about lunch

DS has been at Whitgift for three and a half years and loves it. He's not particularly sporty or academic; he's very quiet and gentle, and I worried that Whitgift would be too much of an alpha male environment for him. But he fell in love with the place and I have to say it has been great for him. The other boys are kind and friendly and the pastoral care has been brilliant.

Having said that, I would be reluctant to give a kid a long commute. I really think there's a lot to be said for going local.

My son had a 50 to 60 minute journey to school. He is an adult now and says he would never send his own kids to a school with that commute time. Makes me sad really, it was a lovely school and he did well there. I never realised how much he resented the journey.

Hopefully all the schools have good food. Whitgift does put on a good spread on open days and assessment days. But to be honest every day is a good food day. I’ve got no complaints when they provide parents with food on match days. Desserts aren’t bad too!

Re journey: as others said do consider this. My son has a 45 min commute door to door. At the moment he’s enjoying it. He gets on the train with a group of friends and more pile on nearer Croydon. It’s this bit he loves.

He doesn’t love it as much when trains are cancelled after a training session and he’s getting home at 6.30pm though. That’s when he wishes we lived nearer. He’s happy to move as long as a train journey is involved. He likes the social aspect where he’s having fun with friends or doing their homework in the way home.

Also, he’s learnt to navigate his way through Croydon whether by bus or train now. But on most days he’s home by 4.30pm.

Interesed in this thread as my son was called for academic interviews for both T and W ( did ot apply to E). Still waiting to hearf the offers will come through but I am trying to understand more about the schools. Had a good chatwith the TRinity head that we really like. I also like Coed 6th frm at Trinity. Whtgift is slighlty nearer and easier to get too but they are ot trek on the public transport so will ned the school bus. My son loved W as he had an enrichment day instead of the academic interview and that was fun. He si sporty and very academic, outgoing, makes friends easily, state school educated. I am sure both schools are gret but wonder if he will thrive more in one than the other. Fingers crossed we wil get offers!An insights from current parents are very much appreciated!

What's your DS's energy levels like? If he's high energy, doesn't need loads of sleep you could go for W.

If he's naturally a bit more lazy and genuinely needs more down-time to process, think, needs more sleep and falls on the lower side of energy, I'd go for the local school E.

Journey times do matter depending on your physicality, stamina etc.

For us DS is lower energy and needs processing, quiet time. We will probably discount W & T for that reason and only apply to E. He needs a shorter journey so as not to become overwhelmed.

And yes although parents evenings are now often online - you do still have to go to things so you'd better also be comfortable with coming home from work, or possibly going straight on from work to an event at the school you have to be at. They don't happen all the time - but I find it annoying! I'm glad my DC that is at secondary - that it's not too far away.

Well done to your DS. I wonder what his CAT scores were like with a flip-like profile like that? It describes my DS very well, he flips all the time. We can't work out whether there's more to him or not. Fingers crossed! Your post gives me hope. :)

@NoMoreFries I am not sure your post was a response to mine?
If so, I do not have his CAT score ( what is it? He is i state schools and will do SATA soon- excuse my ignorane!)
WEe applied for grammar scholls and he passed all the Sutton Grammars including Wilsons. So probably VR and NVR are high.
We are not a family of early birds I am afraid and yiur DS souds pretty much like mine... I struggle to get him up and out on time by 8.40am so the idead of a bus at 7.15am is dreaful...but some neighbours do the journey and they adapted to it.
Our local is Dulwich College, but not sure if he will get a place ( 50/50) and academi cscholarshio is more far fetched.
We like Emanuel when we visited though. I just had to narrow down to 4 choices. Journey was easier in terms if transport but ot much less in terms of time. Good luck!!!!

@IvyLynn we have the same dilemma at the moment choosing between the two schools and came across your post. Curious to know which way you went in the end?

Hi Mammamia7

We went for Whitgift in the end. To be honest it felt like a 'flip a coin' situation to the adults and DS had a strong feeling towards Whitgift. Although interestingly, as I suspected his very strong interests at age 10 (which is what drew him to Whitgift) have been totally dropped and now in year 8 he has new passions.

I honestly feel all the schools discussed in my threads are excellent and any child has the capability to do well academically at them. With the benefit of hindsight, I would choose the school that you DS will enjoy the extras most at (if there is a particular sport/interest), best commute and finally as has been said lots here - your gut feel/impression of the culture of the school.

Whitgift was not the best commute for us and as predicted DS has found that part tough at times. He leaves at 7am and home between 4.45pm - 6.45pm depending on sport. In year 8 he had to cut down from doing an activity at school every evening (as he did in year 7) as he was struggling with homework when he was tired. Although, he is absolutely delighted with the school and very happy with his choice. He has transformed from being slightly neutral about sport at his prep school to loving it at Whitgift. Despite the standard being very high and not making the top teams, he has is playing lots of sport, has tried lots of new activities, plays most Saturday mornings and is desperate to go back to school during half term for sports clubs.

I think there is capability for any boy to be stretched academically if they are up for the challenge. DS is not keen to be stretched! I've also been very happy with the pastoral care and ethos of the school. Although to completely confuse you, I think DS/us would have been equally happy with Trinity/Emanuel.

@IvyLynn. That’s so lovely to hear, it sounds like your son is really thriving… and happy (which is what would really matter most to me at end of the day). Thank you so much for coming back to share!