Suspended from school

[sassym69]

My daughter has been escorted publically and humiliatingly from school and suspended as a photo shared on her private group (snapchat) has been copied by someone and passed to the head. The photo is an innocent pic of her teacher at the board, thats it ! Granted she shouldnt be using her phone, she was ordered to leave school immediately and not given any real explanations. She was treated with complete disrepect in front of fellow pupils too and made to feel like a criminal. Any school governors out there that can offer advice as I am sure there should be a proceedure on this where they should actually speak to the child first ?

[Ginger1982]

"your children obvs do no wrong"

People aren't saying they or their kids are perfect, but it's the fact you've come on here totally blaming the school and completing minimising your daughter's actions.

[IWorkAtTheCheesecakeFactory]

She was treated with complete disrepect

but to be publically humiliated for doing so is also not on.

But rich when you consider what she did. A disrespectful and humiliating thing.

[Littlemeadow123]

You do realise that taking someone's picture without their permission and putting it online/on social media
is illegal don't you?

[Spitsandspots]

she was ordered to leave school immediately and not given any real explanations. She was treated with complete disrepect in front of fellow pupils too and made to feel like a criminal

Your op was completely ‘poor, poor disrespected DD’ yet when pp point out that she was out ot order, and the schools response was correct, it’s snarky comments

as fabulous and sparkly as all you parents out there are and the ones that are A1 parents who are quite obviously perfection personified at being parents yourselves as your children obvs do no wrong

If you had come on saying you were making her write a formal apology and asking what else can you do to make it right you would be getting a different response.

[Ginfordinner]

I'm not going to give you a bashing, but I don't believe that your DD didn't realise that what she was doing was wrong in every way.

Schools make rules about phone use in lessons very clear, so I don't understand why your DD thought it was a good idea.

I agree that writing an apology to the teacher is a good idea. Can everyone on the group delete the photo? And who reported her?

[Lovemenorca]

Given your responses in this thread, I have a very clear idea of you and your daughter

bitchy, defensive, rude, entitled

Your daughter was given an appropriate punishment

You have been given an appropriate response on this thread

[sassym69]

:) YEP ALL THOSE THIINGS

[Lovemenorca]

As I thought

[sassym69]

XX

[donquixotedelamancha]

My daughter has been escorted publically and humiliatingly from school

Not sure how you can be escorted privately and empoweringly but the outcome would be the same. If your daughter feels ashamed then good, it shows she knows right from wrong. Teach her to take responsibility for the harm she did and that it's ok to fuck up when you learn from it.

And as fabulous and sparkly as all you parents out there are and the ones that are A1 parents...

Nobody is a perfect parent. Focus on your daughter's needs instead of your embarrassment and worries. Fake the right response even though it's not how you feel. Show her how not to make excuses by example. Show her resilience.

And, kind of maybe have reassurances that she wont be completely excluded.

It will be news for two days, kids forget quickly.

[LolaSmiles]

And as fabulous and sparkly as all you parents out there are and the ones that are A1 parents who are quite obviously perfection personified at being parents yourselves as your children obvs do no wrong - thank you for all your comments, helpful and snide
Nobody has to be a perfect child or perfect parent to see quite clearly your child was wrong.

I'd love someone to look at the overlap between:

1. Parents who are permissive / think nobody should reprimand their precious child / downplays their child's behaviour
   
2. People who accuse other parents of thinking their perfect with perfect children all the time
   

This thread it's "my child is almost an adult but took photos of a teacher at college and I'm annoyed they've been pulled up... Anyone who disagrees with me Clearly thinks there so perfect". Other threads it's "I allow my children to run around Costa and the manager had the nerve to speak to me about it... Oh, some of you think I was out of order... It must be nice having perfect children who are perfectly silent all the time".

[BrokenWing]

My daughter has been escorted publically and humiliatingly from school

Maybe a bit over dramatic from your dd? Assuming they didn't take all the other kids out of classes, lined them up in the playground and made her walk past them as they shook their heads in disapproval, she has been given an appropriate punishment so far.

I hope for her sake you haven't even hinted at otherwise and are making sure she recognises how wrong she was, how the school have done the right thing and she is now considering how she will sincerely apologise to the teacher and school, rather that thinking she is being unfairly treated.

And no, my ds isn't perfect, I made sure he understood the impact his actions would have had on a teacher last week (15 year old, 5ft 10in plus boys in class being low level disruptive with a new, young female PSE teacher who was struggling keep order generally). Once he understood his 'joking' could have been seen as intimidating, upsetting, and disrespectful to a teacher that is there for their benefit and that he had left himself down, and although he didn't start it he encouraged it to continue, he found her the next day and genuinely apologised (I hope! But at least he got the right message from me)

[mynameisigglepiggle]

You do realise that taking someone's picture without their permission and putting it online/on social media
is illegal don't you?

@littlemeadow123
It isn't illegal

[ballsdeep]

I hate this culture, where people take. Pics an d post them online. There was someone on my fb who took a. Picture of a man walking on the running machine with a really bitchy comment underneath. It boils my piss. Why should your child be allowed to take pictures? And why send it? Surely she didn't send a random picture of her teacher. I call. Bollocks and there's more to it.

[LouMumsnet]

Hi, @sassym69, just to let you know that we've moved this to Secondary Education for you as it was in Further Education.

Hope that helps.

[pigeononthegate]

I'm baffled that of all the things to focus on here, you're honing in on the fact that she was publicly escorted off the premises

What were they supposed to do, put a blanket over her fucking head? It's not the Old Bailey and she's not a celebrity.

Teach your daughter some manners.

[KittyMcKitty]

The thing is (ignoring the fact that she shouldn’t have had her phone out etc etc) there is no such thing as an innocent picture of a teacher at a board (as you put it). I’m sure the picture wasn’t shared to show what a great job Ms / Mr X was doing teaching history / maths / French / whatever. These photos are only taken to laugh at the person in the picture.

I’ve had my photo taken and snap chatted by students in a class whilst I was doing my job. My image was shared against my knowledge/ consent and as your dd now knows these images are further shared! It was a hideous thing to happen- a violation is not too strong a word.

Your dd chose to use someone doing their job as a form of entertainment (plus showing how cool she was taking photos in class).

The schools response seems appropriate your dd needs to reflect on how she would feel if the teacher had taken her photo without her knowledge or consent and shared it amongst her mates for the LOLs.

[saraclara]

I'm still curious about why she took the photo and what she was going to do with it.

There are reasons for rules like this. At basic, both staff and pupils are entitled to privacy. But also teachers' photos have been put online with identifying information and insulting comments in the past (possibly still are). There was a whole website for such photos a while back.

And data includes phtographs, so she doesn't get a free pass out of any GDPR consequences.

[saraclara]

...and of course she was escorted out. You expect the head teacher to just let her out of the office and tell her to run along?
Of course they're going to make sure she leaves the premises, and without gobbing off to all her friends before she deigns to leave.

[Mumdiva99]

Another school governor here. Nothing to do with us. Operational business is down to the head teacher and their staff. Only our business if you complain following the complaints procedure and it isn't resolved. Or if the policies aren't fit for purpose.

[Ginfordinner]

I'm an ex governor. We wouldn't have been involved. Something like this might have merited a mention at a meeting, and it would have been recorded in the principal's report, but that's all.

[ChloeDecker]

Actually, mynameisigglepiggle, taking a photo of a person, where they can expect privacy (inside a home or carrying out their job) is a breach of current DPA 2018 privacy laws. The other issue that would be considered if the teacher wished to pursue this, is what the DD planned to do with the photograph afterwards and the fact she uploaded it to Snapchat, with the intent to mock, would be considered by the police as misuse/cyber bullying.

The teacher probably won’t pursue this however, because unlike the OP’s lack of consideration towards the teacher, the teacher probably considers the DD a lot more.

I still don’t think the OP has properly disciplined the DD (as Bluerussian seems to think so) because if the DD even got a whiff of the OP’s outrage at the school’s actions, and was allowed to vent to her mother about the injustice of it all, then the DD will be feeling vindicated and not be focussing in what they did wrong. At all.

[Creamwallscreamfloors]

This is not a photo she has shared, this is a photo that someone has taken of her photo and shared

Hopefully you have calmed down this morning. It makes no difference if someone shared it. Schools are very good at teaching about the dangers of posting on social media nowadays. It's very likely your daughter will know that if she puts something online then it can be shared and she is still responsible.

I assume she broke the rules by a) having her phone out b)taking photos of staff and c) sharing it. The cynic in me also assumes that the reason for taking the photo was not innocent and was to either poke fun at the teacher. I doubt it was "look at this teacher, they are so wonderful" based.

All of this results in a suspension. Staff have the right to be at work and not have their faces plastered online.

[stripeypillowcase]

And, GDPR is DATA Protection,

yes. and photos are data.
especially mobile phone photos with data about location and face recognition.

[BelleSausage]

@ChloeDecker

You’re right. I think teachers need to start pursuing prosecution in cases like this when parents aren’t willing to discipline or even recognise fault in their child.

Teachers are doing their jobs and are being verbally and physically attacked and shamed on trolled online.

It is disgusting behaviour. Any parent who cannot understand this and correct the behaviour should have it taken out of their hands.

You do your kids no good by coddling them.