Ds in year 11 and considering dropping Spanish. Yay/ nay in his position(10 other GCSEs) and do unis insist on a language? *edited by MNHQ*

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Ds 16 has had a hideous couple of years, won’t list it all as it’s a thread in itself but bullying and grief were involved and he’s now wrestling with anxiety, self hatred and very low. Just about to start counselling. He is doing maths, further maths, computer science, triple science, history, Re, Eng lit and Eng Lang.

The year 10 exam results weren’t great as he wasn’t in a good place to revise. 8s in the maths subjects but nowhere where he should be for everything else(8/9swhere he should be aiming).Eng really not good and now a concern as very necessary.

School suggested dropping Spanish but we weren’t keen as felt it was a bit unfair. Had time to reflect. Just had a wobble (after a recent crash which he’s now coming out of )re revising for mocks as there is so much and he kind of messed up covering everything in the way he was revising. Also due to the recent crash started proper revision late and struggled to focus.

Anyway he simply hasn’t been able to do any Spanish and mocks have started. Spanish teacher suggested switching to Foundation which we rejected as doesn’t seem worth all the work. Now thinking the initial idea of dropping it completely might be a good idea as it would clear a huge work load and he could focus more and really bring up his grades in everything else.

No longer fussed about 8/9s for everything as just want him happy.Thinks 6s would be pretty doable on very little revision but 7s with decent revision attainable.

Doesn’t need a Lang for 6th form but will get that in writing. Would prob do maths, economics or computer science at uni and would like to study ideally in London.

So yay/ nay to dropping? Would it be a big mistake and have an impact on later life choices?

That is really helpful. We get very little info. Had no idea re it not being recorded as either. Thank you.

If the school have offered it, take it with both hands. Y11 is a difficult and stressful enough year as it is without the mental health issues he is already suffering. Anything that will give him a bit of a breather should be welcome.

I agree with Noblegiraffe. She is a teacher and always gives excellent advice. It is far better to do 10 GCSEs and get better grades, than take 11 subjects and get lower grades.

Also, his mental health is much more inportant than a GCSE he doesn't need.

Aw thanks Gin!

OP, I really don’t understand your dilemma. What does he get if he keeps it up? A possible grade 5 in a GCSE he doesn’t need, worry about revising for it, ongoing uncertainty about foundation or higher tier entry, having to attend the classes and do the revision on top of everything else.

Dropping it: An instant end to the concerns about revision and tier of entry. The chance to spend the time he would have been in Spanish lessons improving his grade in English, less pressure on him for revision. You talked about 20 minutes of Spanish revision a day - he could use that time for going for a run/meditating/relaxing and working on his mental health instead.

His mental health is so precious - prioritise it over a GCSE. He’s telling you it’s too much for him to cope with.

noble is right. If the last year with my Ds has taught me anything its that mental health is a priority. He is a high achieving student who will not meet his potential, but that's fine. He is doing the best he can with everything that is going on and that is all that is important.

Noble you are right. Just spoke to him and he said a complete ditch would help with grades but not his mental health as his anxiety isn’t about school. Then I got a shrug🤔

What does he need for his chosen 6th form?

Doesn’t need it for 6th form.

Sorry- I meant what grades generally does he need for 6th form? Because you said in your OP that his grades need to go up, but unless he’s aiming at Oxbridge, frankly whatever he needs to get into the 6th is all he needs and perfectly fine in the circumstances.

ditching it will give him time/break and lessen his load.......

I would wonder if he needs to do others as well especially as he is planning on going into STEM - why does he need 10gcse?

why RS/History - if their not something he loves /is passionate about about then maybe drop one or both of those as well...History is a big load !

It is more important his key marks are as good as they can be so maths/english and science......what is the minimum he needs to do the A levels he wants ?
If he's not in a great place you will need to help him/school prioritise.... whta subjects are really important - I feel parents and schools get caught into xm must do this is its important/the bright kids so need to acheive 8./9 potential blah blah ... better to have good results that get hom to where he wants to go next and bugger the school stats

this is about reducing the overall load on him......

Although he may say that his anxiety isn't about school, the worry about grades is likely to not make things any better so I would advise he drop the subject. I know a couple people I went to school with who dropped GCSE language, and having that extra study time during school hours for other subjects helped them have a little more of a breather when at home. Like PP suggested, maybe going for a run/meditation or socialising in the saved time.

On the flip side, I wasn't allowed to drop my language at GCSE (I didn't have a valid enough reason other than it was the only subject I couldn't get along with and wanted to focus on subjects that would help my chosen career), but they did suggest I dropped to foundation. This was a few years ago now but the highest I could get was a C, which I got with minimal revision because it was very basic stuff compared to what we were being taught. I then got the C and it is just like any other GCSE on my certificates, it doesn't state that I did foundation level, just "GSCE German" but it's just capped on how high the grade can be.

Think he only needs 6s and a 7 for maths and 8 for further maths. Eng Lang 5 I think, need to check. Should get the grades for the maths A levels easily enough. No idea what to do for a third as he doesn’t know what he wants to do in life and everything seems pointless.

I’d be quite surprised if he needs an 8 for anything, or a total of 11 GCSEs. Can I suggest you check what the exact requirements are then help him concentrate on getting what he needs for the next stage. Do everything you can t stop him putting pressure on himself- 8s and 9s might be nice to have- but unless he has his sights on Oxbridge not even remotely necessary.

Just looked. It’s 36 points over 6 GCSEs including 5s in maths and Eng Lang. Further maths Alevel will need an 8.

He’s naturally good at maths so not as onerous as it sounds. Not thinking of Oxbridge but would be looking at some of the other weightier unis. Dare not discuss this as need to take one step at a time. Trying not even to talk about A level choices as the not knowing what he wants to do doesn’t help with the anxiety.

So he needs 3 6s, 2 5s and an 8.

Obviously he won’t be happy with that but it’s all he needs. Make sure he knows that- in my experience kids can get bogged down in thinking they have to get top grades. But both of you knowing that he doesn’t- even if things do go wrong the chances are it won’t be a disaster. Can I suggest - I have supported children, both mine and other people’s, with mental health issues at school- that you try (hard, I know!) to forget about grades and just focus on keeping him at school and trogging on. And drop Spanish if he can. Maybe drop something else as well if the school will let him. Nobody needs 11 GCSEs.

Will do. To his( and my credit as frankly it’s been incredibly hard) he hasn’t missed a day. Can’t say I’d win parent of the year getting him out of the house some days but we‘ve managed it.

DD dropped Spanish in Yr 10 because she was quite frankly terrible at it. It would have brought her average grades down and was taking far too much revision time for something she may have scrapped a 4 in. She doesn't have a MFL but she did take Latin in Yr 10. She's now in Yr 13 and rang UCL who said it wouldn't count against her but she needed to do a term of MFL in one/any year, wouldn't need to pass but would need to turn up in order to graduate. Sign language was also an option. She has reduced offers from all the RG Unis she applied to and a Cambridge interview for a humanities subject.

So no, you don't need a MFL and no it won't limit your options (unless you want to do MFLs of course!!)

Ask him what he wants to do steer him towards dropping it.

Poor boy. He's had it very tough. Hope you are getting support for you too.

“ Will do. To his( and my credit as frankly it’s been incredibly hard) he hasn’t missed a day. Can’t say I’d win parent of the year getting him out of the house some days blush but we‘ve managed it.”
I’m sure you’re in the running!

Another point. I suggest having a deal with him that if he feels he needs a day or a morning or an afternoon off, then let him. We did this with my ds and it helped him so much to know that if he asked I would just say yes, no questions asked. He hardly ever did, in fact, but the safety net was a godsend.
Have you/he considered medication?

Top Unis requiring GCSEs in an MFL and a Humanity etc are long gone.
They used to have a list of "facilitating" subjects which had to be taken into account, but even then you never needed to take more than one or two of them, see www.thecompleteuniversityguide.co.uk/a-levels-and-highers/choosing-a-levels/university-courses-requiring-specific-a-level-subjects-or-grades
(Although I bet they will continue to consider this, but will just keep it quiet).
Just one slight rider on what an another poster has said, if your dc wants to take up a language later at A level there may be a minimum requirement at GCSE. This is what I did then changed to full time French and then became a French teacher but that was back in 1976 and things will have changed a bit.

I get the impression your DS is not at all interested in continuing with Spanish so my advice is the same as other teachers and ex-teachers on this thread. Let him drop it and make good use of the time thus freed up.

Sorry, stupidly said "want to take up a language at A level" of course I meant "once he has got to uni". Dooooooh!

My dd graduated with a first class masters degree in the summer and is now teaching in a secondary school. She only did 9 month of a language in her school life. Let him drop it.

ds1 is year 11 due to health issues he's struggled alot but school have been brilliant with interventions using pe and pshe sessions to do intensive learning when highlighting an area of concern we're just waiting on his mock results next but rather than cancelling a subject it's looking like each registration he will have English literature and then pe and pshe sessions to top up science/re/geography he also has extra lessons tue - Thurs and will add in Monday after Christmas. He also was stopped from doing languages at end of year 8 as it was felt he'd be better off concentrating on fewer subjects but gaining better grades. He's had to work harder than a lot of his peers (attendance about 80%) worst case scenario he has to retake a few. I've always said his health comes first and if it takes him slightly longer to get somewhere so be it - he'll get there because he is motivated and has a good work ethic. Please don't worry about dropping a subject he could always finish studying it along side his a levels if he wanted.

He can do a Spanish GCSE alongside his A levels and continue or take joint Spanish at university if he is enthusiastic. It would be sad for him to not pursue it but no reason why he can't pause to get back on his feet.

B100 it sounds like you are doing really well in a difficult situation 💐. My Ds thinks everything is pointless too. We persuaded him to go to his school's career evening a couple of weeks ago. It was a complete disaster. Ds couldn't cope. Someone at a stand asked him what he is good at and ds said nothing and that he was useless.

Make sure you look after yourself too. I don't have much advice really but you are not alone with this. I hope things improve for your Ds soon.

I’d drop it, dd dropped Latin before half term so she now has 9. It feels like a good number of subjects for her to cope with and she will only have 18 exams in the summer.