SW London girls independent/grammars thread 2020

[autumnnightsaredrawingin]

Last year, there were two amazing threads which were super helpful about exactly this, so I wanted to start a thread for girls due to start September 2020. If anyone from last year wants to contribute please do!

We have narrowed our choices down to 5, sadly not in the right postcode for Tiffin, and decided not to do the Sutton grammars.

So, she will be doing PHS, WHS, LEH, SHS and Woldingham. Also registered for Emanuel but we may pull that one.

@autumnnightsaredrawingin totally agree with the commute decision. Is so important. One of mine is at PHS and absolutely loves it. Sometimes she leaves at 7am to arrive at 7.15 to be with her friends in the morning. I was worried about the all girls thing and alpha female bitchiness but have not experienced anything of the sort. Congrats to all the kids. Well well done

Thanks everyone, especially @Expo as you have a DD there. Is she in year 7? My DD now can’t wait to go and is really excited. Really excited for her, too.

Well done @autumnnightsaredrawingin. Fantastic decision made quickly - I like your style!

We're weighing up WHS v FHSS at the moment. We're on the wait list for G&L and PHS, so an offer could potentially change things.

I'll post separately for views on WHS and FHSS, but if anyone on here has any insight would be very grateful to hear.

Good luck to all those making decisions.

@77seven

Thank you for sharing your insights! You have been most helpful. Would it be possible to pm you re: G&L? I would love to hear your views.

I’m happy to be pm’d about WHS. As per my user name I have dc there

Similarly PM me about PHS - very happy to share info.

I'd echo what others have said about GO LOCAL!

We had the option of JAGS (lovely school) for DD but it would have involved the dreaded Thameslink. Brilliant when it works but when it doesn't it's a nightmare journey for us.

Much better to go for a local bus and/or walk. Think carefully about relying on school buses as well, expensive and quite restricting.

@sandybayley thanks so much- have PMd you.

Similarly, if anyone has questions about SPGS, I’m very happy to be pm’d.

I know this has been much debated in previous years but we're stuck choosing between G&L, LU and LEH (with academic & partial music scholarship) so any experiences or thoughts would be gratefully received.

Distance:
LU & G&L door to door c. 25mins walking/bus; LEH c. 50mins door to door (about 10mins walk to coach and 40ish mins journey) - dare I say it but she often feels a bit car sick, though is never actually sick ... it's so long since I've been on a coach but I presume this could be a big issue on a 2x per day 40min coach journey?

Before the LEH scholarships, I'll admit we previously had G&L and LU as our hoped for top options but I can see her thriving at LEH with the boost of the scholarships.

Dd is a gentle girl but v enthusiastic and determined so she will sign up for every club and team possible in anything (except dissection club ).

I can really see her in the nurturing, happy atmosphere of LEH but I just feel she might outgrow it in 3 or 4 years when she might prefer to be in the social hub of Hammersmith which is local to us (she's v independent and social). But Dd is very excited by the kudos of the LEH scholarships. Always loved G&L and instantly felt it was the school for her when we first visited. Love the outward looking, exciting curriculum of LU - but worried she will be lost in the big year group, however she's pretty resilient so I think she would in reality be fine. She doesn't have a preference for single sex or co-Ed, which doesn't help!

She's v strong in English, history, art, music and she'll really want to play all sports possible (unlikely to be A team material but will be v keen to play lots of fixtures).

Any thoughts?

@givemesomewineplease , re LEH, the coach journey can take ages as it's such a congested area in all directions. LEH has a late coach service for after school sports clubs (I don't know if they charge extra for this). The boat house for rowing is in Sunbury with no public transport links. Just be aware you may need to drive to Sunbury on a Friday pm to collect from rowing & back to school on Sat am for a sports match. (Im not an LEH parent but live locally).

Hi @givemesomewineplease - based on what you've said, I get the impression G&L would be a great fit for your DD. I say this with gritted teeth as we are on the waiting list !

Seriously though - for a gentle girl, it seems a lovely close-knit environment and everyone seems to comment on it being kind and nuturing. I'd be ruling LEH out because of the distance/coach, especially as you have two amazing options closer to home.

I haven't visited LU, so can't comment.

Hopefully someone will be along who has first hand experience of these schools. Good luck !

Quite honestly - I would let your daughter decide. She did all the work, sat the exams, aced the interviews. .. let her choose if she has a preference. It’s her dream first and foremost . She’s the one who has to attend and will be receiving the education.

@givemesomewineplease If it weren’t for the scholarship which would you choose? Assuming it doesn’t make a huge financial difference I would advise you judge the schools and other factors like distance without the scholarships as a factor. How much kudos do the scholarships carry once in the school? Both my DDs have academic scholarships at a similar school and tbh it makes little to no difference and if anything it’s something they do not broadcast to their friends! If she is strong in music there will be ample opportunity to get involved at any of the schools. At the moment it feels like LEH want her more and it’s difficult to turn that down. I would be more focussed on her everyday life for the next 5/7 years and your head is telling you LEH is not the best option. Personally I wouldn’t leave it up to your DD, you need to make the best decision for her, whilst involving her in the discussion of course. She needs to be happy with the decision absolutely. Discuss with her how her day would pan out timewise at each school, starting with what time she would need to get up!

For lovely close knit environment, you should go to FHSS or WHS. G&L is a much larger school with its pros and cons. As a consequence, it is more of a machine compared to smaller schools that I mentioned. Have friends at all three schools and it is very clear that “nurturing” is more applicable to WHS and FHSS where your education experience is almost personal.

I think G&L is not that much bigger than WHS but LU is quite a lot bigger than both? Can anyone with experience of the Maths and computing provision at WHS or G&L possibly offer some advice. Will a girl very strong in these subjects be equally challenged at both schools? Also is the building work at WHS still quite disruptive for a couple of years or is the phase for the next 2 years less intrusive than this year? Thank you!

You are right. It is all relative. You will get 85-90 girls in a year group at WHS vs c120 at G&L. 30-40% larger is quite meaningful in my view. LU is even larger, of course.

@givemesomewineplease you have to ask yourself whether the extra time in journey day in day out (as well as the enticing scholarship) is worth it to attend LEH. My dd is at LEH and loves it but has a much shorter journey time. She finishes at 6pm on 2 nights a week (after optional sports clubs) but there is an option of a late coach (at extra cost). By the time she’s eaten, she starts her homework fairly late and I often wonder about those with longer journeys home. There are also sports matches on Saturdays not to mention parents evenings to attend. Lots of her friends take coaches from all over the place including Hammersmith and they can be quite sociable. I wouldn’t be swayed by the offer of a scholarship. It obviously makes it harder to turn down but her daily life for the next 7 years must be considered. The coach journey is definitely doable. LEH is a lovely school and I’m sure she’d be happy there if she and you are prepared for the commute!

Not sure if my input will help regarding commuting for school.
Sorry for being long winded.

Both Daughters have travelled for school since reception class.

We travel in from SE London to Charing Cross and then on from there.

we catch an early train to allows an hour to get to school. When they were younger school didn't open until 8.30 so we would go to Leon's on route for porridge etc (No breakfast club at school) I'd then drop off DD1 and carry on to work. Then by time DD2 started Husband was also London based so we would breakfast at Leons together. Then he'd drop em off.
we moved DD2 to a new primary for start Yr4 & DD1 stayed to complete Yr6 (her choice) This meant travelling in opposite directions. So DD1 took herself to school (They now had Breakfast Club) Husband dropped DD2.
DD1 moved to Secondary Nr DD's primary so back to commuting together.
Yr 5 DD2 given permission by school to travel on her own. So both go off together via tube or bus to school.

So from this we have learnt.

Family Chat on WhatsApp is extremely helpful. We send a message when kids leave our company so other parent knows they are flying solo.
Either parent can step in to help if there is a problem eg. DD1 zip stopped working on her way home Friday.
If they have delays on Journey can very quickly let us know.
Most tube stations have wifi even on platforms.
If we have a change of plans in the evening we can leave them a message on it to pick up and acknowledge as soon as they turn phone on.
(Both ours do professional acting so last minute castings are not usual!)

Alternative routes : Make sure they know how to get to school if tube isn't running or buses being diverted.
It is far less stressful to know in advance than plan on the fly.

Safe space : Ours are both near Houses of Parliament so risks are possibly higher than most for an incident to occur. Plan for it.
Sometimes schools will get them to leave early or could be locked down.
Find somewhere you would be comfortable for them to head to if the proverbial really hits the fan.
A museum/Library/Church or cafe where they could wait for you to meet them. Hopefully never need it, but piece of mind if you do.

In all her years in primary DD1 was late once. Someone jumped in front of the train we had just missed when it got to next station.
Since Secondary - twice.
Always major train issues- last week they got to school at 9:45!
The school marked them late but with amnesty (so no punishment) as they felt they had left enough time to get in on time and circs were beyond their control.

Extreme last resort: My DD1 has high anxiety with ADD so she over thinks lots of worst case scenarios.
We took part in an active shooter survival day. It helped her to see that the scenario is not as likely as her overthinking might lead her to believe and that she already had a lot of the common sense skills needed if she were to end up in that.
I did debate for a while on if this would help or make her worse and it has helped.

Because of a central London school all her friends are around there or further out. She meets up with them all in the hols. They usually aim to meet outside of school as its central for all of them.

They will be extremely tired while they adjust to new routes. She is still in bed between 8-9 school nights so she can get up at 6 (on train by 7 in school 8)
She doesn't like it, but she is not a morning person so until she copes better with mornings we do keep an early bed and no phones in bedroom after 8.

Hope some of this helps especially if you have girls that will be travelling for first time.

Hi all, absolutely well done to everyone some really great offers. I’m so proud of all the children it’s been a very hard process.
My son got offers from Emanuel, Ibstock and KGS. KGS was my DS favourite but unfortunately they have not offered him any kind of scholarship or bursary and we can never afford to pay full fees. Now I’m not really sure what school to go for :((

@Sass22 congratulations to your son! Have the other two offered bursaries/scholarships? Both Emanuel and Ibstock are lovely schools.

@Autumnnight thank you. yes both great scholarships and bursary. Now we just don’t know what to decide. I’ve heard good things about both schools. My son is academic and all rounder child.

@Sass22 I think then that you should absolutely take either of those two. Which does your son prefer? Sell it to him! Did he understand beforehand that if KGS didn’t offer a bursary or scholarship then it wouldn’t be an option? It’s really hard, but he will eventually love either of those. I guess you could try ringing KGS and explaining the position, but I have no idea if they’d be able to do anything? Maybe someone else will have experience of this. Good luck to you and your son.

@Chocolatedrops2 - that's good to know about the 2 late optional sports clubs each week finishing at 6pm. My dd will sign up for everything and anything, she already has evenings of 3 clubs in a row, which I've tried to stop but she wants to do everything. Which makes me nervous for a school far away and reliant on a late coach. I really want a true understanding of timings for late clubs and weekends, as right now she's very excited but a few terms in it could all become a drain.

I could be proved wrong but she is about as slight as a girl can get, so the idea of her excelling at rowing seems farcical … however on our tour of LEH she obviously (as usual) showed great enthusiasm, maybe she could be a cox! So it's unlikely the rowing will be an issue for us but obviously we don't know for sure.

@pamplemoussed - that's exactly what I want, for dd to have the final choice. And honestly we would be delighted for her to go to any of these schools. She did all the work so she deserves to have her say. However she herself says she can't choose between them, and I know she would be happy to go with whatever we think. I do know enough about her to know that she has little idea of the strain of a long commute … we currently live a 2 mins walk from her primary school. It's so easy and fabulous as everyone lives close to us and she can roll out of bed and be on time. The contrast to 1 hour 40mins commute in total each day is pretty stark. She is already making suggestions of how she thinks she could cope with the motion sickness in the coach . I also have two younger kids so I am very concerned about the many journeys to attend concerts, sports events, parents eve etc, when they will have to be dragged along.

So my logical side says to forget LEH, but the reduced fees would really really help as we have three kids. And the music seems fantastic. She's also keen to play lacrosse.

re. scholarship kudos - the main thing is the confidence boost for dd, she herself would never ever tell anyone as she's v modest, but LEH have a scholars club called 'The 42', which she would be in. I have no idea how often they meet or how inspiring it is, but there obviously is something provided for the academic scholars.

Any feedback on music at G&L? Especially for string instruments (grade 5+) and choirs?

Watch out with rowing at LEH - in year 8 they are only at the boathouse at weekends, after that they can be there during the week and then can’t get the late coach. Ditto fencing - beginners finish 5.15 but the better ones are 630 after the coach