School for Bright and Quirky Boy Hants/Surrey/West Sussex borders

[Traci1229]

Hello! I never thought finding the right school would be so hard and I need your help. DS12 is quite bright (ed.psych. gave IQ of 142) and has learning challenges (sensory processing issues, social anxiety, poor working memory and organisational skills). He attended a mainstream local school until Y2, then the placement fell apart and we home educated until Y6. DS wanted to return to school so we enrolled him in an independent school with support for SEN students in Hindhead; DS HATES it and wants to leave. We looked at another school for more academic boys with additional needs in Farnham but were turned away. Does anyone else find themselves in a similar situation, past or present, and how are you going forward? Any school recommendations? Thank you so, so much for any help.

I would also echo the Box Hill suggestion. It's not known for being academic necessarily but it does get the best out of pupils by being nuturing and supportive which it sounds like your son needs.

OP, I really feel for you. The issue you have is that your boy is twice exceptional and a “nurturing” school may not meet his academic needs and may not provide the quiet, structured classroom he needs.

Could you move or have you considered boarding? A Quaker school like Sibford might be an option?

Thank you! Everyone has been so helpful and supportive.

worriedaboutmygirl-thank you for mentioning “twice exceptional”. I avoided mentioning 2e as it has provoked some heated responses on MN before but you clearly understand the situation. Boarding would be a last resort but we have thought of moving. I have never heard of Quaker schools but will investigate.

Ditcham is certainly close by but Box Hill would be quite a commute. I hadn’t really considered Ditcham a strong possibility but I will certainly look now.

Box Hill is a boarding school. My DC is very dyslexic and enjoyed his time there, academically he did OK but not brilliantly.

Thank you for clarifying redredrobins. 😊

I'm with worriedaboutmygirl and feel you should definitely revisit More House. There are so few suitable placements available. I have several friends with highly anxious kids there. I went to visit in case it was an option and thought it was a fantastic place and where each child was enabled to reached their academic potential. Could you persuade them that you can work on his anxiety with a clinical psychologist? It may be the case that if it's the right place his anxiety will dampen down. It's awful having to beg a school to reconsider but I know many who have resorted to that and have been successful. Those who shout the loudest etc
If you were more SW London way I'd also also recommend The Moat in Fulham. Worth a look
Good luck - really feel for you. I know how hard anxiety is to manage

Be a little wary of mainstream schools such as Box Hill, many of the less academic schools will accept most pupils (it's a business and most are not full despite what they say) and not necessarily provide the support. Why would you think another mainstream school would be different and he wouldn't hate it? What does he hate about his current school?

Just seen your question above...going to try and PM you

Thanks Puffty-I have emailed them to plead our case (so hard) and will see what they say. I think they can afford to be so selective now with an outstanding Ofsted and oversubscribed school but we can only try.

Yetanotherdiagnosis-I could not agree with you more! I feel many of the heads and sencos I speak with are more salespeople than educators and I struggle to know how much to believe. I am very sceptical at how well he would do in mainstream but part of me thinks I should focus on the “bright” part and less on the “quirky” part in the hopes that being challenged and engaged will improve the situation. I could be very, very wrong though...

Various options
Would somewhere like Unsted Park be suitable. Very expensive so would need EHCP
Seaford is a mainstream indi that maybe worth a look.
Is your son proud of his academic ability. If so looking at super selective may be a good idea.
I am guessing New Forest Small School is too far away but I believe you can flexischool there.
What is it he hates at his current school?
The other option is online schooling such as inter high.

part of me thinks I should focus on the “bright” part and less on the “quirky” part in the hopes that being challenged and engaged will improve the situation.

In that case, take a serious look at RGS and ask what they can offer. I think it's an outstanding school in every way but that's because they more than met the needs of my SEN son. But every SEN is different and what they offer may not fit.

I think he’s going into year 8 so RGS and other very academic independents might not be an option at this point unfortunately. Have you looked at King Edwards Witley?

Why would rGS not be suitable. They might consider a yr8 intake and they certainly have a yr 9 one.

worriedaboutmygirl-is this because they tend to have intake for specific year groups? I think I saw King Edward Witley took in at Y7 and Y11 so I eliminated them. I will check for RGS and others.

Mary19-New Forest is a hike as we considered it when home educating. Flexischooling at our current provision is our immediate hope until we find something better. Have you used InterHigh? A friend suggested this but I suspected the students need to be highly self-motivated, which is not a point we have reached yet.

Thanks growlingbear-I will check them out and see about the intake. If they def do Y9 then maybe flexischool and therapy for Y8 and fresh start in Y9...

KEW may not be oversubscribed whereas RGS undoubtedly is. Lots of schools locally have Year 7 and Year 9 intake but the oversubscribed ones will have offered year 9 places last year for the Op’s DS’s cohort. Less full schools may be able to offer places out of normal intake years. I’ve PMd you

Hi
Seaford I don’t think is going to offer you the academic rigour. Have pm’d you also

Which school is he at presently?

Where is RGS & what does it stand for please?

It's Reigate Grammar School - mixed and private. On these threads (this 1 is very old) it can also stand for Royal Grammar School in Guildford which is all boys private. I

RGS stands for Royal Grammar School in Guildford (not Reigate) and this is a very old thread