Advice Please: Son was assaulted during Induction Day

[SarahG28]

Yesterday my 10 yo was on his last ‘Induction Day’ at the secondary school he will be attending in September when he was subjected to an assault by another boy, also on his induction day. The incident happened during morning break time when my son who was stood alone was approached by a group of lads, surrounding him and quite aggressively saying he had been saying things about one of these boys mothers! My child doesn’t know, has never seen or spoke with any of these kids before and definitely has not been saying anything about anybody’s mother so was obviously scared when he was ganged up on. With this he then tried to get away from the situation by running away, only to be chased down by the group who when caught up with him then carried out a totally unprovoked assault. He was grabbed on the back of the neck and forcefully pushed to the ground or in the words of my son ‘taken down’ by one of the boys who then repeatedly called my son a ‘pussy’.

Unfortunately my child was too scared to report this incident at the new school yesterday and now sadly fears that there will be further attacks in September when he starts and is therefore fearful of starting.

Witnesses have come forward and we have the first name and class teachers name of the child who carried out the assault, along with details of the school he currently attends. I have emailed this school to report the incident and I will be phoning the secondary school where the attack took place this morning. My question is.....have I done enough?

Thanks

Yes, you have acted appropriately. Think what you want to ask them for - him not to be in a tutor or learning group with them

• him to have a further induction opportunity eg could a group of them from primary go up for an extra sports event with a teacher or something (so he gets to revisit and attach new memories to the school before sept)
• a buddy to be allocated

Also as this is quite a traumatic incident, listen when your son talks about it, and gently help him process it and work through his feelings. I’m so sorry this happened. How do you think he is coping with it?

I think you have done the right thing at the moment. Await responses and follow up if necessary. Someone will know the legal side of it but it’s my belief the HT of the primary school is responsible for the behaviour of pupils off site. The child was on an officially organised trip off site. However whether it had the same status as a normal school trip is a matter for debate. I assume DC make their own way to the school and no teachers actually accompany the DC.

Heads can certainly punish DC on their way to and from school so I would expect the primary school to act because it would seem to fall into this area of responsibility for the Primary Head.

Additionally, I would ask about supervision at the secondary school. This took place on their premises so the Head does have responsibility for the safety of visitors. Were young visitors adequately supervised? Obviously the secondary staff don’t know these DC and trusted them but were they left alone too much? However, these DC are on roll at a primary and they can only be punished by them.

I hope you get a suitable and timely response.

@EvaHarknessRose Thank you for your help and suggestions. My son was already taking extra visits as part of a transition group as he was already anxious about the 'big move' and worried about being bullied. When asked about the incident he retracts and doesn't want to talk about it so I daren't push him too much, I just hope he'll open up and talk when he's ready? My son is a thinker, he'll bottle things up rather than speak about it. I just prey this doesn't impact his learning when he starts in September.

Is there another Senior School you can look st if this Senior School doesn’t tell those boys they’re no longer welcome to join that school? I wouldn’t be sending my DC into a school with these kids who are bold enough to do that on an induction day visit. No way.

I’d make an appointment to see both Heads

DS is going to need to speak up

Once he was on the ground did they hit or kick him or were they just verbally abusive?

@BubblesBuddy thank you for your reply. I will definitely be asking about the supervision, or lack of yesterday as one of my questions along with a long list of others I have!
I just hope the primary schools HT acts on this incident and speaks/does something about the child as I was horrified by the way another year 6 child attacked my son in such a grown up manner. This wasn't just some playground shove or punch on the arm but a vicious move that you would expect someone much older to perform, not a 10-11 yo! It scares me to think what this child could be capable of in another year or two's time!

@IncrediblySadToo not really no as all his friends from primary are going to the same school and I feel if moved to a different school he wouldn't adjust well due to being autistic.

Thankfully he was just verbally abused once on the ground but this will stay lodged in his mind now as he is quite a sensitive boy.

Just received this email from the attackers school HT - Gobsmacked!

'Thank you for alerting to me to this incident. Obviously this is not the behaviour we expect from our pupils and it will be addressed in school. However, as this incident took place at *(Secondary School), I would suggest that you contact the school directly to discuss the matter, as that is the educational establishment which had responsibility for the children yesterday. They also need to be aware of both yours and your son’s concerns for September.

I have alerted Mrs , Headteacher, to your email, and she is expecting contact from you regarding this matter so that it can be dealt with appropriately for all parties involved.

With Regards,

What's wrong with the reply? You really should contact the secondary school so that they can look into what happened and put strategies in place to stop it from happening in September.

It's good that the primary school are going to address it but they can't do anything come September.

I’m sorry this has happened to your DS but it is an absolutely ok response and the secondary school are who you need to be dealing with.

I think the primary school have taken the correct approach. They can't tell you what action they will be taking so can only tell you that the behaviour will be addressed. The secondary school is the one that will need to really deal with it.

A fight broke out between two Year 6 boys during my DD's induction day a couple of years ago. One boy was from DD's primary school. The secondary school teachers made it very clear that they would not tolerate that behaviour. DD's primary school were also apparently furious with the boy.

It wasn't brushed aside at all, even though the two boys were apparently equally to blame. In the situation you describe, I would imagine it would be taken very seriously indeed.

I would use this as an opportunity to find out exactly what measures they will be putting into place to support your DS in September.

That sounds a good response.
The primary school hasn't got responsibility at that point-nor can they reasonably be expected to investigate. What if the other boy says that your dc hit first and all his friends back him up? Would you expect your dc's head to punish him on that sayso? No, that would be unfair.

They're not going to, nor would they be allowed, to tell the other boys that they're not welcome-assuming they're state not private. That is a unrealistic expectation.
What they can do is be aware that there was an issue between the children, and check they're not immediately in the same subject groups for anything. But actually, the chances are that they won't remember your dc once they're all dressed in the same uniform.

@DecomposingComposers yes I will be phoning the Secondary School on my break shorty. I'm not sure what to think about the reply from the primary school tbh as he's an only child and ive never had to deal with anything like this before but I suppose I was just expecting more of an acknowledgment? After re-reading it a few times I am understanding where there coming from though.

The reply from the HT at other kids school sounds fine to me, she's sorting him out at her end and has alerted the High school head who is expecting you to talk with them also.
Hopefully the High school head will be able to place your Ds in a class that is better suited to him and away from other boy.

I think you have received a good prompt reply from the primary saying it will be addressed.
They have gone above and beyond by contacting the secondary school HT on your behalf.

What do you 'need' from the secondary?

• contacting the miscreant to say they have marked their card, that type of behaviour is totally unacceptable and will lead to BIG TROUBLE if there is a repeat of it
• an extra transition session perhaps
• not to be in same tutor group
• a more senior pupil buddy to turn to
• support in reporting stuff in the future

UPDATE
I have spoken with the Secondary school and the HT was very understanding and has proposed an action plan which I am happy about so hopefully this has been nipped in the bud and nothing further will come of it. The boy(s) who assaulted my son have admitted what has happened and are being dealt with accordingly by their school. The HT is concerned however that the staff on duty during this break time failed to notice what had happened and is going to investigate further in order to hopefully prevent an incident like this happening again. I will continue to support my son and with any luck over the school holiday he will put this matter behind him and start his journey into secondary education on a positive note! Thanks to everyone who has taken the time to comment, really appreciate it! x

I'm so glad you have had a good outcome and that both HTs have been helpful.

Just to be clear, as these boys are identifiable as coming from another school and have acted in such a manner which harmed another person, they can. and should, be disciplined by their school. The original message from the primary school was incorrect and shows no understanding of the legal powers of the Head to act. They cannot push responsibility for discipline on to the other school. It appears they have now taken responsibility and hopefully they were put right on this situation by the secondary school! The DofE has clear guidance on this.

I am glad you are relieved and that the secondary school is putting a plan in place.

Your poor son. What an awful intro to big school. I hope this is the end of it and that the school take all bullying seriously.

@TeenTimesTwo yes thank you. Overall I am pleased with the outcome and feel a lot more positive now for my son starting in September

@BubblesBuddy this was my original thinking which is what gobsmacked me but I am glad things look like they are going to be worked out and measures are being put in place. Overall I think its a good outcome for everyone involved.

@chilling19 I know it was awful seeing him upset, especially when he was worried about bullying anyway. I'll have a talk with him later and update him on everything that has been talked about and agreed today and hopefully that will put his mind at rest.

SarahG: I think a lot of teachers and parents do not know the up to date legislation regarding school discipline and what Heads can do about discipline and behaviour outside their own premises. I needed to look it up to make sure I was correct! It was complicated slightly by being on the premises of another school but the primary DC are not on roll at that school so ultimately punishment isn’t down to them. They might, of course, now review their supervision on familiarisation visits.

Oh OP I have no solution to offer but how horrible for your DS .

I am so sad this happened to him . He sounds like a nice kid .