Single parents and bursary applications for independent schools - any experience?

[Jangle4]

DD is currently in Y5 and I'm looking at both state and indy secondary schools as possibilities for Y7.

If I apply to the independent schools, I would also apply for a bursary. I'm currently on a career break for family / personal reasons and while I will have enough coming in from a lodger, p/t freelancing and savings to cover current living expenses, I'm in the earnings and assets category which private schools consider low-income. This may not be true in future, if circumstances change and I can return to full-time employment, but in Y7 and possibly Y8, we would need some level of bursary for these schools to be realistic options if DD passes the entrance exams.

Looking around on the net last night, I realised that I would probably have to provide some sort of information about DD's father. He is an alcoholic in poor health, long-term unemployed, and lives overseas with some of his relatives. He has never provided child support, financial or otherwise and DD has seen him maybe five times in five years (when other family members have paid for a flight and hotel).

Am I likely to need him to fill in forms about his (lack of) income and assets? I believe he receives unemployment benefit in his country of residence but that's about it. He's not good at filling in forms or keeping records of any description and this could be a major stress for everyone.

Do schools accept any other proof that the non-resident parent does not contribute? What documents have other single parents applying for bursaries been asked to provide? Happy to hand over all my own financial info going back years if necessary.

I will obviously ask the schools themselves if I decide to apply but would be interested in the experience of others first so I can be prepared for what answers I might get.

The father bit would be reasonably easy to prove and a bursar would accept several bits of information, however “non standard”.

More pressing would be proving the reasons why you don’t work full time. For example, Health reasons or acting as a carer would need to be backed up by medical records, receipt of carers allowance etc. If that’s the case then your bursary application would be very strong based on what you have said.

Unfortunately, a chartered accountant on a career break to look after younger siblings doesn’t cut the mustard as you have the earnings potential to afford at least some of the fees - you have just made a lifestyle choice.

Our experience is that bursars are usually pretty approachable, so you could ask to have an informal chat with the bursar at the schools you are considering.
I have a chronic health issue that prevents me working full time, and we simply explained this in a covering letter - I have never been asked to prove it.
You will either be offered a bursary or you won't, so there's nothing to lose by applying.

Thanks both.

"You will either be offered a bursary or you won't, so there's nothing to lose by applying." - Yes, that's how I'm thinking. I'm happy to just provide all our information and see if we meet the criteria. At the end of the day, if I can't afford a place on the basis offered, we would walk away and find another option. If we get a place at a good state secondary near our home, we may take the independent schools off the table anyway.

I don't expect we would qualify for a full bursary even if I wasn't working at all as I have some savings (not enough to pay for more than a few terms at full rate), equity in our flat (on a fixed mortgage for three years so I'm not clear what would be expected) and the understanding that my previous employer will probably take me back in a similar role in a year or two, once life is on an even keel.

Both of the independent schools we're looking at seem to offer a number of % fee reductions for Y7 joiners on a sliding scale for families with incomes below a certain level, if children are successful in the entrance exam. I am just wondering how I will be required to demonstrate that I'm the only significant adult in the means assessment.

@Jangle4 I've sent you a PM

Jangle4 I'm also a single parent whose DD is non contact with her father (court ordered, he doesn't know where we live now and long may that continue). I can't work due to being a carer for DD1.

The bursar at DD2's school was lovely, really friendly which allowed me to be completely honest prior to DD sitting the entrance exams - that anything less than 75% bursary was impossible, and even then it wasn't definitely doable. DD only wanted to sit the exams to see how she would do - she was home schooled prior to this.

Anyway, she did well in the exams and was offered a full fees bursary for the full 7 years as my situation wasn't going to change - DD1 is always going to need a carer.

It was completely unexpected they'd offer this, so without applying you'll never know what they may offer Oh, and re DD's dad, they accepted that there was no contact and a significant risk so I didn't have to provide any details

Good luck!

You'd likely need to be working to get any bursary, unless ill health or caring responsibilities completely prevented it (e.g.disabled child) so if you're going to apply I would get back to work asap.

The main thing which might preclude a bursary being offered from what you have said is that you are not working but are able to earn a significant salary when you do (as you say when you return to work you would not need a bursary). So you would need really good reasons why you are not working - ill health, caring responsibilities etc.

Having equity in your home is not necessarily a reason not to offer a bursary - they know you need somewhere to live and are not likely to suggest you selling your main residence in order to pay fees. If you had a second property, that would be different and they would expect you to liquidise available assets in order to fund the fees. Equally, unless your savings are hundreds of thousands of pounds, it's unlikely to be a major problem.

In your shoes, I would contact the bursars of all the schools you are interested in and get all your financial info together. Ask for a meeting to discuss the likelihood of a bursary and the likely amount you might be eligible for. This is what I did and based on my profit and loss info for my business and tax returns, they offered me a really accurate idea of what we might get. Mostly bursars seem to be immensely kind and helpful people IME! They will absolutely tell you if any of the stuff you have mentioned will affect the result.

I don't think your ex will be a problem. They will want to see bank statements so it will be clear you are not receiving support.

Thanks everyone, especially for the real-life examples. They give me a better idea of how conversations might go and what I should prepare to provide.

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Hello, same experience as others in many ways. I am a single parent, my daughter is in receipt of near full bursary. My bursary was based on household income only - i.e. the money that comes into my home, made by me. I of course included my ex's maintenance payments as part of that household income but they accepted that he does not live with us and only makes child maintenance payments. However, as others have said, you will need a very good reason to not be working - I was told that both parents (in the case of a couple) are expected to work and single parents are expected to work, only exemption being your ill health or if you are a carer (a child who is over 4/5 and at school does not count) So, if it were me, and you can, I'd start looking at getting back into work so you will be looked at more favourably, even if just part time

For DD's school we had to provide court documents or similar to disregard a non resident parent, it's to stop divorced parents claiming their child lives with the lower income parent exclusively to cheat the bursary system. They also expected parents to maximise their income eg if you said you only worked 20 hours a week they would calculate earnings on 37.5 or something like that. Remember bursaries aren't magic money, it's coming from parents working hard to afford school fees

Thanks for the further examples - all really helpful thoughts to take on board.

I name-changed partly because I don't want to go into detailed discussion of personal circumstances. However, the current p/t working seems to be catching more eyes and getting more attention than the single parent question so I'll add a few broad clarifications.

I am working. In the short term this is p/t and freelance, at least for part of the tax year/s likely to be considered and documented for a Y7 bursary. The reasons are the usual multiple, complex and family related issues which hit many of us in middle-life involving the health and age of others, several UK and international moves including our own, and a demanding job with lots of travel in which I'd been working 50-60 hour weeks since before DD was born. I could not keep all the balls in the air in 2019 with everything that needed to be done and chose a career break rather than run the risk of being sacked or giving myself a breakdown, both of which I've seen happen to others.

I have worked full time for my entire post-uni life except for 6 months after DD was born when I was lucky enough to have mat leave on full pay. I am not planning a life of elective p/t working. I do not believe in the magic money tree. I do not receive any benefits. I have no second homes or other assets beyond residence and savings.

In the longer-term it would be great to be able to freelance full-time but I'm only a few months into this and can't guarantee how it will work out. At the point that savings start running low, I would have to either apply to return to my previous employer or look for roles with another company.

I'm not someone who has been planning for private education for years and am very much feeling my way with Mumsnet help...

May I bump this thread as I am in a similar situation. Any advice on what to expect from the home visit would be really appreciated. In particular, what paperwork would they want to see beyond the original application I submitted?

Just to make it clear, bursaries are not paid by the other parents, it's a fund all on its own. Usually from the alumni and other charities, funds raised etc.

OP, you would have to look for a school with a proper trust, foundation etc. Mostly an old established school that also does other significant charity work within the community. Preferably, the fund will be have its own offices etc. and if possible, fund more than one school, charity etc. Be careful of a few schools, with a high reputation, but no real money. If you are in London PM me.

In the examples I have put above, the bursary is not to put you or your DC out, they just want to help and make sure that your DC just gets on with her education.

The government itself cannot chase an absent father, so be careful of schools that insist on the father filling in the form, so how can they then chase the father who is overseas - that is what one of my DC school said when I asked, it was just not in their policy to chase absent fathers, they just went with what the primary parent had applied.
In my case they also understood that I had not worked in years, so not easy to even get a low level job because everyone wants a 20 something graduate, not a nearly 40 mum for that junior office job, just saying. Also looking after small children and it's not easy to get a job that will take you 9.30/10 till 2.30, so that you have enough time to pick up the other kids from school - but in my case it was admin jobs I had, your case may be different as your job is very professional.
What I am basically saying is that some schools, if you look for the right ones will be able to understand your circumstances if you look hard enough and your child is clever.

DS applied to 4 very competitive London schools, and passed all with interviews, but I believe that the 2 that did not take him was because we were looking for bursary and they had a 'lower' pile of acceptance for bursary children than the paying children. Fortunately, DS had chosen the one he got into as his number 1 choice from the get go.

The home visit, the guy did not go through our house, he just sat at the dining table with me and went through what I had already filled out in the forms. He did not ask for other paperwork. Please note this was a guy from a school that did not accept us, not the school that did- they did not bother.