I need advice - we live in a "black hole"

[MrsMigginsLovelyBaps]

Long story short, we live in an area where our son is very unlikely to get into either of the 3 secondaries in our town. One is a faith school (I actually went there back in the day) but we're not churchgoers so would come right at the bottom of the list on distance only, and there have been no allocations on this basis for several years.

The other two are heavily oversubscribed, one is our 'nearest' school based on the non-faith, co-ed, non-selective criteria, and although we are in the 'priority area' for the other, it is extremely unlikely (though not totally impossible) that we would get into either of them on distance. We also have a 'bulge year' situation.

Looking at other schools for which we are in the priority area, I cannot see that we stand any chance for those either - again all oversubscribed and too far away.

In the last 3 years, children from our area of town have been allocated a CofE school in a nearby town, which although has a good reputation for the pastoral side of things, and is much smaller than a traditional secondary (around 600 pupils I believe), doesn't have the greatest progress 8 or GCSE results. Last Ofsted in 2017 was 'Good'. It also has spaces in years 7, 9 and 11, so you can see that very few people are choosing it.

We have to put 4 options on the form. Given that we are likely to be allocated this school regardless of what we do, and that I really cannot see how we would get into any of the others based on distance, I don't want to 'waste' a choice on somewhere we have almost zero chance of getting into and would like to put this CofE school as 4th choice. I worry that bearing in mind the bulge year and the act that many of our son's peers are in the same situation, if we don't put it on the form we may end up with somewhere miles away because everyone will have put it as their 4th choice.

My husband is adamant that our son will not go to this school. I am rather more realistic - he hasn't seen it (or any of the others), and just keeps saying 'We'll appeal' if we get it. I've tried explaining that you have to have grounds for appeal, and they need to fall under certain categories, and as our son is just a middle of the road sort of kid I can't see how we could possibly get this to work. Every time I try to talk to him about this, it ends up in an argument, he just keeps saying "he's not going there", and won't listen to reason when I say we have to work with reality not what would happen in an ideal world.

Anyway, husband problem aside (it's me that does all the research, visits the schools, talks to other parents and makes all the applications so I might just tell him to stick it), what would you do? Put the CofE school in 4th, or .... what?

I'm really worried that if we make the wrong decision, we could end up in deep shit - and all the advice I have read says to put a 'safe' choice on the form if you have one, then hope for the best under CI.

Sorry, that was long. Any advice or whatever greatly appreciated.

Your plan is sound. List the schools you are hopeful for but unlikely to get, but also have a good insurance down, to ensure you don't just get whatever is left over.

He can still appeal for the more popular options when the time comes. On what you've said it will do no good, but it might shut him up if he hears it from an independent panel.

Tell your DH in words of one syllable that puutung down the least awful other school is better than random allocation. And that it makes no difference whatsoever to the appeal/s for the school/s in town

As I understand it, the priority you have listed them is not passed to the schools. So you won't be turned down by 2, 3 and 4 because you didn't put them first; that's not how it works.
You may not want the CofE school but you may want it more than another school way across the county, if that's all they have spare to offer you. At least it's reasonably close and sounds nurturing. I'd list it in 4th place if you feel it's your "banker". And you have nothing to lose by putting your other preferences first - you never know. And at least applying for them now gives you the right of an appeal / to go on early waiting lists.
You say you're in the "priority zone" for certain schools - what does that mean exactly? Here in London, where there is a black hole for schools, a few schools name certain roads in the black hole and the few kids from these roads go more or less to the top of the list as they'd not be in line for any other school, living where they do.

Believe me, I've tried. He's just so bloody-minded about it all, despite not having a fucking clue about how it all works.

I just wanted a sense check, because we've been going round in circles, and I was starting to think I was going mad. He keeps saying "believe me, no-one's going to want that school", but doesn't see that actually some people do, and that we don't have a snowball's chance in hell of getting any of the other further away ones so there's no bloody point putting them down.

I think that somewhere in his brain he thinks if you just refuse to engage with the process, or only put down what you want, you get it because they have to give you something you want. It's like talking to a brick wall.

Anyway - thanks for the replies. I shall try and broach it again.

goat priority area here means I have no clue - it's not defined. As far as I can tell, it means there are certain schools that will consider you if they haven't filled all the spaces with children that fit all the other criteria.

Well, you don't need his permission to put it down. So just do it.

Priority area is just another way of saying defined catchment - so the criteria would run (after LAC/SEN) something like siblings in priority area, others in priority area, other siblings, other (with distance as tiebreak in whatever category they reach) clear maps should be provided with other admissions information, as they are not necessarily circular with school in the centre. That is why your nearest school might not be your catchment school.

If you qualify for none of your preferences, then you will be allocated the closest school with a vacancy. That won't be your priority school if it is already full with families who applied