Queen Ethelburga's - opinions please

[MichelleC69]

Hello everyone, I'm new here. My daughter is 15 and in her GCSE year, studying at Leeds Grammar School. She is unhappy there because of the pressure she's under and is desperate to move for A levels. And that's where my problems began....top of her list is Queen Ethelburga's (as a boarder) and I am against it for so many reasons. I think if she feels under pressure now this will only make things worse, in a strange environment and having to make new friends. Plus I don't want my 16 year old away from home all week. Am interested in hearing the opinions of others who may have kids there or have looked at it.

Thanks in advance,
Michelle

Just a brief warning to say you probably won't find honest reviews of Queen Ethelburga's here (or probably elsewhere) because they are very keen to threaten legal action at the drop of a hat.

My DDs went to state schools but both moved to different ones for sixth form. They were fine. There was a lot of movement at this stage and even those in established friendships seemed keen to welcome newcomers.

Thanks, that's partly what worries me tbh. What are they hiding?!

It is still worth using the search function - both on MN (to find other threads which include links and some, in my humble personal opinion, alarming facts), and on Google News.

Past safeguarding issues might be of interest to you, some of which, according to the prosecutor, arose directly from the beneficial owner of the school (via offshore trusts, but still) who used to have a senior role at the school and whose court case's conclusion may now have been reached (I don't know the outcome, check local papers/online for the verdict and what it was about)

I have no info other than from reading MN threads and public sources. The school will no doubt say that all the issues have been addressed. Do your own research!

I once looked round it.

You had to drive through a pig farm to get to it.

I'd have sooner dropped my kids off at the pig farm.

HTH

You could try PMing talkingpeace or maybe talkinpeace search her user name. She might be able to link you into the thread. It was very big and with many posts deleted as the school threatened legal action against them.
I do think you have to be realistic, most 6th formers at independent schools are going to feel under pressure to achieve. Many parents believe that they are paying for better results and that these results are going to be better they think their DC’s are going to get in the state sector. Both the parents and the school are hoping for and aiming for top grades and admissions into top unis. Schools use these top grades/admission % in top unis to market themselves to potential parents and of course they market themselves with league table positions be it local or national. You could argue that it’s easier to get top grades and thus apply less pressure to your pupils if your a international big name super selective that’s carefully selected its pupils at yr 7/9 and chucked out those who aren’t performing along the way than a less selective school but whose who have pupils who still have high expectations.
In your situation I’d google the school then go and look at it with an open mind, try and see through the clever marketing that all schools use to the real school. Don’t be impressed with en suit bathroom, manicured lawns, Olympic sized swimming pools or endless Astro turf pitches, it’s the schools ethos you’re interested in, watch the staff and the pupils, do they look relaxed and happy you are in their home, the relationship between pupils and staff should be more informal than that you’d see in a state or day school, do you like the staff you meet and what you see, they will be acting on your place when she’s at the school.
Look at other options to get a comparison look at somewhere neither of you like the look of. At any school check they actually offer what you want be it A level choices or the tiddlywinks club never assume it’s going to be there. When my DS’s were at boarding school it never ceased to amaze me how many intelligent sensible parents often with lots of experience of schools would fail to find out important things for them e.g. that’s they could flexi board (in a school that clearly states its full boarding only) or find out only on arrival that there is no golf course for their golf mad DC and then proceed to moan and complain about it.

Never forget that bar a handful of very big names all schools want your DC and you money so ask difficult questions and check that it’s what you want.

Thanks for all of your replies, particularly the latest (very comprehensive) one. My fundamental problem (aside from all of the bad things I've heard about the school) is that I don't want my daughter to board at such a young age. I don't like the idea of not seeing her every night and not knowing how she's feeling. 16 is still so young. This is putting me off from even looking as it's not an option for her to commute - it's too far away. And if I agree to her boarding and then she doesn't like it, we don't have a back-up plan. She's in a private school now (GSAL) and I just feel that all of the things she doesn't like about it (ie the pressure, the rules etc) are going to be magnified by moving schools to another private school and boarding. It's very difficult as she's been sucked in by the facilites, and her father (my ex-husband) is encouraging her.

My daughter has just gone off to board at age 16 without a second glance. She is however very independent minded and she has gone away to access a highly specialist course that is only available at a handful of colleges.

But, from my research into the various options available I have to say buyer beware. In her world we know young people who have had awful times with poor safeguarding and pastoral care. There is a school in her subject area that have a similar threaten legal action ethos to QE for example and I would be very, very wary.

Google 'ethelburgas school court'.

There are two Ethelburga schools on the same site:

The Faculty of Queen Ethelburga's
www.compare-school-performance.service.gov.uk/school/131124?tab=ks5-16-to-18

Average A level grade B-

Queen Ethelburga's College
www.compare-school-performance.service.gov.uk/school/121743?tab=ks5-16-to-18

Average A level grade A-

My DD has just moved for sixth form and has had no problem fitting into her new school. There's a lot of new students in her year.

Do you live close to GSAL now? What about Bradford Grammar or Woodhouse Grove where she can go on the bus each day? Or there's Harrogate Ladies College or The Mount in York? Both of those seem to be walkable from their respective railway stations.

Or there's Harrogate Grammar (state school)? I know someone whose daughter goes there and they live in Leeds.

I can’t objectively advise you about boarding as my DS’s have boarded from prep. Some may find this difficult to believe but I used to be very anti boarding I couldn’t imagine what type of parents send their DC’s to boarding school.
My DS’s have thrived at boarding school DS2 boarded for 10 years, contrary to what some will tell you about the impact of boarding he’s a normal well adjusted emotionally intelligent popular young man who has have an excellent loving relationship with his parents. I genuinely believed that what his boarding schools offered in particular his secondary school could not be found in any day schools so although I missed him massively I felt it was the best option for him.

Sorry, i forgot to add that my DC have been occasional boarders when work takes me away from home. DD loves it, DS tolerates it but he doesn't like being there over weekends.

Thanks...I live a mile or so from GSAL (actually moved here to be closer to the school). I never wanted her in private education, it was her dad's choice. And I just feel that moving her to another private school is not going to solve the issues she believes she currently has at GSAL. She has a lovely group of friends, has never been bullied, so I just kinda feel like what's the point in going through all of that upheaval if she could end up in exactly the same situation as she is now?

I'm not judging anyone who sends their child to board, I just don't feel that it's for us as a family.

Principal's daughter now runs the school.

Should just add that I have also worked in boarding schools if I’m being honest some who join in the 6th form find it hard to settle. It’s a massive cultural shift and the you have to get your head around a new school boarding the jump to A levels (or whatever) and make new friends in a relatively short time. Many happily do it but over the years I’ve seen a significant small minority who struggle. A lot depends on your DD’s personality, you have to be resilient, adaptable, happy for little privacy, be a team player even if in reality you’re a lone wolf, accept rules that are made to make life work for the majority even though you might think are ridiculous. It’s not for everyone but I genuinely believe for those it works for they will develop life skills that will stay with and benefit throughout their adult life so it’s a very positive life changing experience.

I know someone who did a placement there while training and then reported several issues to the local authority safeguarding board - she was horrified

My niece went to Ethelburga's. She is a forces child and they get a good financial deal?

It seemed horrendous

Most sixth forms have open days in the Autumn and you could take your DD to a range of different ones though perhaps not the one she wants. If she wants to move for A levels have you looked at sixth form colleges? Much less pressured and more of a college atmosphere than a school. My DC both thrived at one and it was a bridge between school and university.

Thanks - yes, one of the options is a 6th form college in Leeds (Notre Dam) however my ex isn't keen as it's not private. My eldest stepson is doing A levels there and really loves it.

Family member went age 12
We live about an hour away and she would beg to come to our house at weekends. The first time I went to collect her from there I was very reluctant to take her back
I’m anti boarding school anyway except in certain circumstances but it had a very unpleasant vibe

I moved my ds from a high pressure private school to the state system and he is so much happier. Private isn't always better and even the same school can suit one child and not the other.

If you want to stay in the private system but with less pressure you could look at Woodhouse Grove. It is accessible from Leeds and gets great results from students with a broad range of abilities. Your DD could flexiboard if boarding appeals to her.

I have known students and families who found what they perceived as a pressurised environment at Bradford Grammar did not suit them but who thrived at Woodhouse Grove.

My cousin's daughter went to Queen Margaret's from 11 to 18 and was very happy there.

Ripon Grammar is state but has boarding places. I believe that some join in 6th form.

Queen Ethelburgas pupils always seem to be buying a lot of food/junk food in Morrison's in Boroughbridge, always makes me wonder what the food is like!