Urgent, opinions please!

[Busymummy50]

My eldest is in year 5 and we have very little time left to move by October to apply for secondary school.

Our local school is up an coming and results are better than other local schools. Most of my son's friends will be going there. School has a large 3 mile catchment meaning it takes kids from the rougher areas too. We visited the school and deputy head seemed very enthusiastic which we liked. They have TAs working in lower sets to help the struggling kids.

After school and during change of class time, some kids were loud and unruly.

This school we feel our son will fit in more but more chances of being influenced by kids. He's a bit lazy and doesn't like going to school and we've started using a tutor to help him keep up as his mock sats was not good although he's capable but can't be bothered. Not sure if this is normal at this age?

School in new area we are thinking of moving is very different. Academically always have been doing well with good results. Kids seemed very well behaved compared to our local schools. Senior staff (2 we spoke to) seem very cold. Spoken to parents and I gather if the kid is academic then they will do well but if a kid has special needs needing the Senco then it's not good. A year 11 student told me she suffers anxiety and their pastoral care is not good. My son suffers from anxiety (chews fingers) and we have no idea if he would need and help with schoolwork in a few years.

So the dilemma is stay in our current house and go to an up and coming school which covers the rougher areas too with more chance of bad influence but they have TAs to help struggling kids or move to nicer area with school with better results and a tiny 0.8 catchment area and better influences (hopefully) but no TAs who provide help apart from.sppointed TAs for individuals who ate statemented or have an EHCP.

My son is not great socially and we are worried about a move and leaving his friends but we also have to think about what's best for our daughter. And being in a safer area as where we are currently is up and coming but still lots of crime

Is your area really unsafe?
Do you really want to move?
Local school sounds pretty good to me.

Our DD went to our local secondary, which has a reputation for excellent academic results, has a very middle class intake, and is highly lauded locally. She has ADHD - not behavioural so much as learning difficulties - and was absolutely miserable there. The pastoral care was nil, they refused to acknowledge any kind of SEN ( to the point that any child anticipated not to do well in a subject simply wasn't entered for the exam) and she was actually punished for things that were as a direct result of her SEN. As in your case, the senior leaders were cold and unapproachable.
In contrast, the secondary slightly further away is in a 'rougher ' area and has a very mixed intake. The staff were warm and enthusiastic and the pupils seemed to have a good relationship with them. The atmosphere was warmer overall. When we visited, the school itself was shabby and run down, which put us off slightly, but has now moved to a brand new campus. At the time we saw it, it had less students applying than the other school, but we guessed that when it moved into the new buildings, it would become more people's first choice and it has - this year, it is oversubscribed.

So, if I were you, I'd go with your gut instinct about the people who lead the school. They are what make the difference, and exam results aren't the whole story and can come at a cost to pupils ' wellbeing.

I think the ‘rougher areas’ thing is a bit of a red herring. There are plenty of kids from ‘nice areas’ who arse about, don’t pay attention and don’t do what they should be doing.

From your description I can’t see any good reason to go for School 2.

Our area is getting better. We live in a nice part but right next to the rough part. There's been shootings and stabbings and this worries me as my kids will be in or pass these areas. New area is more villagey and quiet and crime rates are lower. Although we feel our son might benefit from the local school here, we have a younger daughter who at the moment is very academic and she might benefit from the other school do it's really hard for us to choose

Also in the other school the actual teachers seem very nice. Students have commented on the nice teaching.

After school and during change of class time, some kids were loud and unruly.

This is quite normal in a secondary school, and not in itself a cause for concern. They are teenagers who have to sit still, be quiet and concentrate for a large part of their day.

Thesecondofhername: yes you're right. Some schools kids are more well behaved than others though. There is another secondary school locally which is near my kids primary school so I see those kids everyday and see them running out on the roads etc, I had to do an emergency stop once or would've run one over. This is not the school I am talking about sending my kids to though. I guess it's hard because I have 2 very different kids and I have to think about both of them.

Also, many years ago I went to the secondary school locally that I am thinking of sending my kids to if we stayed in this area and u didn't do well. Not all the schools fault, I was easily influenced and had a very strict mother so I rebelled. It kind of makes me feel like giving my son a different start than mine

There are other good schools in the new area too, not just this one. It's hard to choose as we have no idea how our son will be in a year or 2

You sound like you have made up your mind.
Careful of basing decision on the school as it was in your day though.

I think you know your child. My ds2 is anxious. He gets stressed when other kids misbehave, when the class gets in trouble, when it's noisy and he can't concentrate. Our school choice sound similar to ours. He will be going to the high achieving, stricter school because it is calmer and he thrives when rules are clear and adhered to.

The non-local school sounds like one of those zero tolerance boot camps.

It’s a personal choice, but mine are doing very well in a school which is slap bang in the middle of the rough area we live in . It is an Outstanding school which does well by students of all abilities, and is run by teachers who seem to like young people rather than tearing them like dangerous beasts.

I'd choose the bigger school whichever it may be, more kids mean more potential friends for your DS and he'll have a better chance of finding like minded people.
Good luck

The local school has 800 approx students and new school in new area has 1600 approx but has a 6th form too.

Students usually make their own way to secondary school or the LA have to provide transport where that is impossible. So why would your children have to go to the same school?

School 1 sounds reasonable. I figure a happy child will learn almost anywhere (and mostly stay out of trouble), an unhappy child won't learn in the best school in the world.

Is say 800 was plenty bit enough. At that size, your child will have plenty of friends to choose from but it's not so huge that he'll get lost in the crowd.