Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Secondary education

Connect with other parents whose children are starting secondary school on this forum.

15 yr old permanently excluded from school.

65 replies

caringdad66 · 19/01/2018 20:36

Looking for advice guys.
Been told it will be 6 weeks before the local authority can place him in another mainstream school.
Therefore for the next 6 weeks they want him to attend our local Pupil referral unit.
Am very wary of sending him here, due to its poor reputation.

Are these places ' schools of crime', or will he be better of going for 6 weeks whilst he awaits his new school placement?

Just to add , he was permanently excluded for assualting another student, who is thankfully not hurt or injured, but didn't deserve what my son did.

OP posts:
strangerhoesagain · 19/01/2018 20:38

Pupil referral too ‘criminal?’
A violent person who assaulted someone?

Might do him good

caringdad66 · 19/01/2018 20:40

Point taken👍

OP posts:
PerfectPenquins · 19/01/2018 20:40

SOme PRU’s are absolute shit and yes the kids do often feed off each other and revel in shit behaviour. Can he go to college for a 14 years + course?

caringdad66 · 19/01/2018 20:44

Thanks for message- will look into 14+ courses- but it's only for 6 weeks until new mainstream school comes thru.

OP posts:
youarenotkiddingme · 19/01/2018 20:53

The intention of PRU is to work with students unable to access MS education and rehabilitate them as such.

I would have thought it beneficial for your DS to attend. Surely you want him to develop strategies so he doesn't get into the situation he violently assaults someone again? Next time could be worse and he could get a criminal record.

As he's been PEX I am assuming this wasn't first offence and the exclusion is because his behaviour has been poor for a period of time. It's very unusual - however severe the crime - for schools to PEX at first instance.

PerfectPenquins · 19/01/2018 20:56

THE intentions may be there but from experience that doesn’t always become reality. No strategies, minimal work done if any and kids ruling the place. Staff holding on until those kids are moved on which almost always goes past deadlines. Do you think another mainstream at this point in time will be beneficial? He could go to college in September full time, it’s a very different atmosphere to school and feels a lot more grown up.

Is there any issues that CAMHS could help him with? Has he said why he assaulted the other pupil?

GreenTulips · 19/01/2018 20:59

Am very wary of sending him here, due to its poor reputation

It's going to have a poor reputation!

They do tons of good work and have access to all sorts of well qualified staff and can do all sorts of referrals

It may also be a wake up call for your child

Embrace it - give it a go

blueCanvas · 19/01/2018 21:01

embrace the experience, it might scare him straight.

Hercules12 · 19/01/2018 21:03

Is he easily led? I think it depends on his personality which only yo7 know. Good luck what ever you decide.

CosmicCanary · 19/01/2018 21:08

Hi OP

I have already been through this.
DS15 is on his 3rd PRU.

He has an anxiety disorder which was only diagnosed last year but by then he had been excluded from mainstream school, his first PRU had its funding cut so closed but it was a good unit. The second which was the most suitable and the one he was happy at ended as they cut my sons funding so he ended up at a 3rd.

It was terrible. They are billed as a behavioural specialist school. They are not.
I could list all the fuck ups but i would be here all day.
We ended up asking SS for support and a few meetings later ( This week actually) they gave back my sons funding so he can return to his second placement.

I am not trying to scare you but more show you that out of 3 PRU 2 were great only 1 was shit.
The advice I was given by SS was keep my son in education cos the second you remove them the LA wash their hands of your child.

6 weeks at home bored he will probably get up to all sorts.
Send him to the PRU and keep the continuation of education.

lljkk · 19/01/2018 21:08

This might work.. Radio 5 live feature on PRUs. I imagine PRUs vary, some great, some mediocre or worse.

I know someone who works in our local one; says you've got to have a great sense of humour. A lot of resources are thrown at the kids & many of the kids get a healthy shock about "I do not want to end up with the problems all these other kids have, I need to do better."

llangennith · 19/01/2018 21:10

Do you really want him home 24/7 for the next six weeks?!Confused

BoneyBackJefferson · 19/01/2018 21:11

your son either assaulted someone badly or has a long list of bad behaviour.

The PRU could be the making of him, and it will enable people to put help in place for him.

BubblesBuddy · 19/01/2018 21:26

It’s like any other educational provision, some good some not. Like anywhere else it will depend on the leadership. Obviously the pupils are not angels but some will be wanting to start again. Others will be staring at a custodial sentence down the line. Few pupils in them will be doing well at school and many wil have difficult backgrounds. (I used to work for a LA and negotiated for pupils to return to mainstream school).

They rarely have the resources to teach everything. So you will have to see how you can help make up any deficiencies. If your DC is really keen to make a new start, then hopefully he wil be wise enough to steer clear of any real troublemakers and keep his head down. They are holding institutions but good ones can work well. If he is repeating unacceptable behaviour, which led to the PE, you need to try and work with the Pru to stop this or the next school won’t want him either.

The next school will have his details and no doubt you will be asked to sign a contract of behaviour when he starts. It will be a very difficult time and he will attract attention from other children who may goad him. They will sniff out that he was excluded from another school. Children always do! So he needs to be robust and not take offence or join in. I wish you well. I think the pru is the least if your worries though.

caringdad66 · 19/01/2018 21:31

Am very grateful for all these comments.
Love Mumsnet at times like this.

OP posts:
catlovingdoctor · 19/01/2018 21:36

He sounds like a little charmer.

rcit · 19/01/2018 21:36

Personally, I'd try to get therapist and/or an educational psychologist to see what the issue is and how to help it. Maybe the PRU would do this for you for free, I don't know as they are so expensive to access (for the state) that it's almost impossible to send a child there in my area anyway. Perhaps they are so expensive because there is good help in there.

Do you know why he assaulted another student?

caringdad66 · 19/01/2018 21:39

He assaulted the other student because they had set up a fake social media profile in son's name.
They then mocked and questioned his sexuality.
Son overreacted and got himself permanently excluded.

OP posts:
caringdad66 · 19/01/2018 21:40

Always one unhelpful one😞

OP posts:
CosmicCanary · 19/01/2018 21:42

Just ignore the OP.
For some unless your child is perfect they will have a dig.

ASauvignonADay · 19/01/2018 21:43

Is it that the process in your LA is 6 weeks in a PRU, or just that it will be 6 weeks into a place is available?

In our LA you have to go to the PRU if pex'd, unless you go out of the city.

Some PRUs are brilliant, but I would avoid it if it's a possibility.

CosmicCanary · 19/01/2018 21:43

Can I ask why the 6 week wait?

catlovingdoctor · 19/01/2018 21:43

I am sorry for my earlier comment. It sounds like he was victimised terribly and reacted after a lot of pressure.
When I was 15, I was attacked (assaulted) horribly by another student in front of everyone. It was really horrible and humiliating. So I tend to just react sweepingly when I hear about it happening.
I am sorry for the situation he and you are both in; I hate injustice.

Cauliflowersqueeze · 19/01/2018 21:43

Try not to worry. The PRU will give him access to a huge amount of support from many different agencies. Go there with an open mind. If he’s prepared to help himself it could be a really excellent experience. They will be very keen to help him get back on track.

CosmicCanary · 19/01/2018 21:44

Just ignore the OP.

I meant just ignore THEM OP. Sorry Blush