State secondary school yr 10 dilemma - any thoughts please?

[talkingrabbit]

So my middle DS, 15, has come home 'gutted' by his own admission, because one of his best mates from school who is also his closest partner in his sports teams (including county and academy in one particular sport) is leaving immediately to take up a sports scholarship to a well known public school.

My DS is now talking about wanting to attend an open day or have a personal visit at this same school, and discuss with the school whether he could also get a 100% scholarship. The boys are about the same standard at the one sport, but DS's friend excels also at a summer sport whereas my DS probably just has the one area of excellence. My DS is also not amazingly academic, mildly dyslexic (much weaker on paper than orally), a B grade rather than A* student. As far as I know DS friend is more of an A/B student.

Should I just treat this as a knee-jerk teenage eaction to losing a really good mate and mucker, or should I be taking my DS seriously, getting a prospectus etc.? Despite being professional middle classes, we don't earn anywhere near the amount that would allow us to randomly find an additional £30k a year to pay for this kind of education. We also have two other children and it seems unfair on the others to be pursuing this.

My concern is that we take him there, he's completely wowed by it, wants to go with his mate but has not a hope in hell. That then sets him up to be even more negative about his current good-in-parts comp.

Any thoughts on where we go from here, anyone had anything similar?

He is already in year 10 so will already have started his GCSE courses and be a half term into the syllabus or do you mean he is currently in year 9 and the friend will start there next year in year 10?

If the other child is an A* student then possibly he'll be able to make up the work that he may have missed or he may be behind in. The other school may be doing different boards etc, or have approached the course in a different way (having done some topics that your current school do eg. after Easter?) Would your child be able to cope with that?

Some schools for sports scholarship do need to see excellence in more than one sport but some (especially if the child is at a national standard) will look at the one sport.

Few schools will be awarding scholarships to students who are already part of the way through Y10.

I would do some research with him about the possibility of a sports scholarship for sixth form. Then if he meets the criteria, he can apply in Y11.

Potentially leaving in Year 11 would be an appalling idea!

That's really helpful, thanks so much folks. I don't want to say too much more to explain the other boy's situation as it could identify him - there are specific links with the school that mean that he had an offer made that the school had left open to him to take up whenever his family felt they wanted to, and he has just decided this week he's sure he wants to go. My DS isn't in the same situation regards to entry part way through year 10.
And that's a good point about my DS waiting till end of year 11 to see if the interest has waned and also whether he has made national selection for u16s. Catching up would be a significant issue I think, as the language of education he's had so far isn't English in any case.

DS is now talking about taking up boxing seriously as a second sport between now and the end of year 11. Unfortunately for the family dynamic he's very good, I hate boxing with a passion. Is boxing a thing at public schools? (I have this Monty Pythonesque mental image of Edwardian gentlemen in striped shirts trading uppercuts against some Hogwart's type backdrop ).

No! Few public schools Box - if any. Boxing gyms do that under strict rules and conditions. It is a very specialist sport and unlikely to carry any weight at private school. Also, is the sports scholarship worth much? Most are not unless you get a bursary too. These often go to the brightest. I would look but be realistic.