Disappointing Gcse results

[verydisappointedteen]

My Ds was predicted all a stars & 8s; hovever reality is a lot different. He got 6 a & 4 b & 1c and now feels results are worthless and universities won't consider him. Am trying to console him but would be useful to hear any stories about people with similar results getting into well regarded universities to give him hope that this is not a career defining moment! Thanks

The pressure doesn't come from us or her school but from herself and her group of similarly high-achieving friends

This is very true. I am so glad to not be a teenager anymore.

He didn't work very hard.

So he didn't work very hard and didn't get the grades he was expected to? This is an excellent lesson to learn. Instead of saying 'gosh, what wonderful results', because they're not, for him, say 'well now you're doing your A-levels if you don't want to be in the same position if 'I could have done better' on A-level results day, you'll need to actually put the work in'.

Unless he was hoping for some ultra competitive university place, what will matter is his A-level results for university entrance, and at the moment he has full control of those.

Onwards and upwards!

If he got those results by not working very hard, he should actually be pleased. It shows what he is capable of if he does work hard.

I'd rather get less good marks than I thought I would get because I didn't work hard enough. Because that is something that is within my control. If you do worse than you thought you would and you don't know why, that's hard because you don't know what to do to change it.

I did a lot better at A level than I did in my GCSEs partly because I worked harder and partly because I was doing subjects that I was good at and had got rid of all the subjects I was less good at.

Mayhemandmadness lovely to read your post.

My DS was disappointed and has equivalent of 4Bs, 4Cs (was predicted higher).

He is now likely to go down the BTEC extended diploma route which had previously never occurred to us. Sounds like your DS did Business? And has clearly done well

Thanks everyone but have to say not too chuffed with the implication that I'm too competitive and plying pressure on him! I asked for people in same boat in the hope that real stories will help him manage his disappointment which is very real for him and I accept that. He needs to deal with this feeling in a positive way so something can be gained from it ( we all experience disappointment on occasion whatever the trigger and have to learn to cope and move on). Thanks again everyone for taking the time to comment :)

From the title I thought someone was in the same boat as my DC who scrapped by with the equivalent of 4 Cs and 5 5Ds. Luckily their college place is secure, but seriously get a grip those are bloody brilliant results OP.

The problem is that one cannot get top grades by being in the top 1% of ability any longer! Pupils have to put some effort in too!
Yes, 6As may well be disappointing if he's actually capable of 10 A*s, just because it's better than 90% doesn't mean it's a good performance for him.
He needs to buck up no, as the step-up to a level is huge, and there is no way on earth to pass those without some graft nowadays. And he needs to recognise his coasting for what it is, and learn to make an effort.
He can obviously still do very well at a level, but not if he doesn't change his approach.

The pressure doesn't come from us or her school but from herself and her group of similarly high-achieving friends

That is so true. Dd is struggling a bit because she didn't match up to those in her group who did exceptionally well. Whereas there are others who had lower aspirations and are very happy to have exceeded them. Think she just feels deflated after all that hard work rather than as proud as she should be of herself.

Think she just feels deflated after all that hard work rather than as proud as she should be of herself

I think this is how DS is feeling- he revised so hard, so so hard. Very little by way of any social life, hours everynight after school- long hours across the weekend. He said that he did all this and 'only' got Bs. He certainly hasn't had this attitude from me because I think he has done really well.
The attitude comes from his peer group and its really sad.

There's nothing wrong with his results. I got 3As, 4Bs and 5Cs, went on to get ABB at A Level and got into a top 10 University.

As PPs have said, what is good is relative. We are just as pleased with DS's grade C resit GCSE English as we are with DD's A grade A level maths. They were equally important for what each wants to do next.

When DD1 bombed her AS levels through lack of work we encouraged her to bank the feeling of disappointment and remember it. She has worked far harder since and is now working towards a good degree in her chosen subject.

If he performed significantly below his predictions of course he's disappointed! Give him a day or two to get over it and he'll be fine.
My dS said yesterday that we need a word to describe the emotion that's a mixture of disappointment and relief......

I also opened this, thinking this might be similar to my son's.
He worked really hard. But this is what he got.
English Language Grade 3 - Predicted Grade 5
English Literature Grade 4 - Predicted Grade 6
Mathematics Grade 4 - Predicted Grade 5
Science - Core Grade C- Predicted Grade C
Science - Additional Grade C - Predicted Grade C
Computing Grade D - Predicted Grade B
DT - Graphics Grade E - Predicted Grade E
Geography. Grade D - Predicted Grade C
Religious Education Grade D - Predicted Grade B
No chance of sixth form. Fortunately, his Plan B, College have agreed to take him, although he did not meet the conditions of his offer.
I have spent the last 24 hours being "Postive Mum", taking him to talk to the College, reassuring him. But writing this, I can feel the tears coming. I'm so disappointed for him (never disappointed with him), that despite all his work, he has little to show for it.

Bugger, that shoud be Positive Mum

I also think the OP is being given a hard time (perhaps the thread could be reworded?)

My ds is in a similar position, predicted grades mostly a lot higher than he achieved. We live in an area with lots of excellent state schools with high achieving pupils. With the added factor of having a high achieving older sibling. But luckily ds is quite laid back about it, happy that he can still do the subjects he wanted at A Level. He does come from a long line of contented underachievers!

I suppose I am the one wondering whether I should have done more to restrict screen time etc!

And those of you who say it doesn't matter, it may actually. There are lots of universities & courses now ruled out. Obviously ds may never have wanted to apply to them anyway...

And sometimes it's good to know something has been ruled out at the start rather than applying further down the road & being disappointed then.

OP there are so many unis & courses now (if that's the route your ds wants to take) that as long as he works harder for his A Levels he will be just fine

hedwig2001 a couple of years ago my DS got similar results. Not enough to do his chosen course at college. So he went into the level 2 course (GCSE level) and has just completed the level 3 course (and finally passed his GCSE english) and is going to apply for an apprenticeship in the raf.

It may take a little longer but your DS can still get where he wants to go.

I think a lot of the problems come from predictions by schools that are way off beam because the teachers are too generous about the quality of work they are seeing and the oddities of exam questions year on year that children cannot cope with.

Predicted grades seem to be based on: "if everything goes exactly to plan, with a following wind, you arrive in the exam hall calm and collected, and then you see perfect questions that you have revised accurately for, or, as your teacher, I have accurately predicted will be on the exam paper, and you write down everything you have been told to legibly leaving no important detail out and you finish on time having used your knowledge to answer the applied questions and memorised the texts you need for English ". Does not happen for lots of children.

So children have to manage their sadness and bewilderment when they feel rubbish. It is difficult to be bouyant when you thught you should do better. GCSEs do, and will, count at some more prestigious universities now because of the linear nature of A levels. Some courses weight GCSE results very heavily. No AS results to guide admissions tutors. Course admissions details need to be read very carefully. However, 6 As is no barrier to many courses! Just let him work out he needs to do more work in the 6th form.

Lastly, working hard alone is not going to get good results. Intelligence and talent do have a role to play. So no-one should ever think they should get all top grades. Pressure from within to achieve ridulously highly is a recipe for mental health problems and needs to be countered NOW if young people are anticipating a full basket of 9s in 2 years time and will be devastated if they do not get them.

I don't know of any Uni that looks at people's GCSE/KS4 grades - A Levels is the rate determining step.

Oxbridge do.

Oxford appear to however extract from Cambridge site below for info: (don't think either oxford/Cambridge on his preferred list ;)

There are no GCSE (or equivalent) requirements for entry to Cambridge. GCSE results are looked at as a performance indicator, but within the context of the performance of the school/college they where they were achieved.

Applicants have generally achieved high grades in subjects relevant to their chosen course, and most students who apply have at least four or five As or As at GCSE. However, there are always exceptions and we don’t require a minimum number of As/As at GCSE. One of the strengths of the Cambridge admissions system is its ability to assess all applicants individually.

Our research shows that post-16 examination performance is a much better predictor of degree success at Cambridge. While GCSE results are looked at as a performance indicator, this is within the context of the performance of the school/college where they were attained, and strong performance in Years 12 and 13 can make up for a less stellar performance at GCSE.

I assume his predictions were based on sats and if he worked hard, which you say he didnt. Id ask him if he thought he deserved the highest grades, which he expected, based on his actual work? And ask him what he needs to do differently at A Level in order to improve. Then go from there.

" if most of your friends are celebrating strings of A*s then it's ok to feel down if you don't."

I think it is OK and natural to feel down and disappointed if you got lower grades than you expected and were predicted, when you did the necessary work etc

However, if your friends got a galaxy of A*s it is important to pull out and look at the bigger picture, because 6As and 3 7s is , IS, a GOOD RESULT. Better to look at your results in the bigger picture, where they are a good result, than look at your friends and feel, as the OP says, that your 'results are worthless'. Those results are NOT worthless, not by a long chalk, The are A level entry results, Russell Uni promising results, I don't know much abut Oxbridge, but again, if anyhting other than Oxbridge is 'worthless' then again, you need to look at the bigger picture.

However, OP, I do sympathise with individual disappointment.

I think half the problem is that they are predicted high results, so they almost get too relaxed about it and think they don't have to put the work in to get them. You say you think he coasted, that's something he can't afford to do at A level if he wants to get into a good uni. He really needs to hit the ground running and maintain a really good work ethic all the way through. He certainly sounds like he has the ability to do well at A level as long as he puts the work in. My DS found doing past papers the best form of revision at A level, he used to literally do them every night and go online to mark them. So many students in his year group got really poor marks at the end of year 12 (they don't do AS anymore do they?) and it was simply because they didn't appreciate the jump from gcse to A level. Once he has his A levels his gcse grades won't seem so important!

Oxbridge do

They also look whether you went to the "right" school, the clubs your father was a member of, and whether your mother was a whipper in of the "right" hunt.

And for that reason, I'm out

Yep - my DD is disappointed with a 9, 2x7, 3A,3B - because SHE thought she could do better. (I am bloody delighted she got good grades)

We point out to her that she has done marvellously well, that her grades enable her to follow whatever future she want, she has many choices available to her - we went out for a meal last night to celebrate her achievement, but she still felt a bit down.

Her friends all had a spread of grades A* to D - but she said - "that is fine for them, I know I did better than most of them, but MY better was not good enough for ME".

Which is fair enough I suppose - if she had coasted to top results in everything, then there would be less incentive to push revision etc for A levels, now she knows she has to work harder to get to the top - which is what she strives for, she has ambition - her disappointment with good grades is just part of her.

I don't want to change her, so cannot say to her she is wrong to want to have done better , just that she does not yet realise that she has actually done blooming well.